A Lot to Make Up For
by houseprodigy
Summary: Ed and Al just returned home from the other side of the Gate, and it didn't take long for things to return to normal. But are they really? Ed's got a secret, and Al's not about to let him keep it. RoyxEd Postmovie
1. Everything?

_No, come to think of it, I didn't miss you at all._

The words cut Edward deep as he thought about them. Did he really mean them? He had said the words himself, he knew it. Still, there was something that bugged him about it. Had he _really_ said them? He couldn't imagine what had come over him. He'd spent the better part of the past three years trying to get back to Amestris, and the only thing he'd managed to do so far was cause trouble, as always.

He sighed, rolling off of his bed and walking over to place the book he'd been reading back on the shelf. It was no use trying to read right now. No matter what he did, his mind drifted back to the words he'd exchanged with his one-time superior, Roy Mustang, who had just recently been reinstated to his former rank of colonel.

That was good for Ed, since "Bastard Brigadier General" didn't seem to have the same kind of ring as "Bastard Colonel." He smirked as that thought crossed his mind. Though it irritated the dark-haired man to be called that, and Edward knew that fact very well, he'd probably never get sick of calling him as such. Even if he _did_ get around to telling the colonel how he _really_ felt.

_I didn't miss you at all…_

What a lie, and he knew it. There hadn't been a day that had gone by that Edward hadn't thought of the man in some way or another…his eyes, his hair, the way his usual smirk turned more into an actual smile for some reason Ed didn't know…it was always when the dark-haired man thought no one was looking…

"DAMNIT!" Ed shrieked, tapping his finger hard on his forehead as some sort of weak reprimanding for thinking that way yet _again_.

He scratched his head, still cursing himself for being so careless. "One of these days I'm going to be thinking like that when I'm supposed to be doing something important, and then I'll probably be killed or run into something, or drink milk, or--"

"Talk to yourself like a crazy person without knowing someone's watching?" came a voice from the doorway.

"Ahhh!" Ed shouted again, half-lunging in the opposite direction from the origin of the voice, which incidentally, was right into the bookcase. He spun around, ready to attack whoever had surprised him, only to meet the laughing eyes of his younger brother.

"Damnit, Al, how many times do I have to tell you to knock!" he spat, rubbing his shoulder that had gone first into the bookcase.

Al's brow furrowed, his hazel eyes narrowing just slightly as the corners of his small mouth turned downward into a frown. "Brother, you never told me to knock. Besides, we share the same room!"

Edward sighed in defeat. His brother was right, and his frustration had allowed him to act rashly. He knew he'd probably sounded meaner than he'd meant to, but he wasn't ready to admit something so secret just yet. If anyone found out…

"Brother?" Al's quiet voice brought Ed back to reality. He glanced back over at Al, noting that he looked distressed for some reason. Had he been _that_ harsh?

"Yeah?" he asked, trying to soften his voice to show his brother he hadn't meant anything when he'd yelled.

Al's frown only deepened, much to Edward's chagrin. The younger sibling looked at the floor and began to shift his weight from one foot to the other. "Um…you've…I mean, I don't want to seem prying or anything, because it's been so long since I've seen you, but…"

Ed smiled. He hadn't realized how much he'd been used to his brother's previous metal body. Watching the younger blond squirm made him want to laugh. Had he always been like this? Was it just the lack of a flesh physical form to observe that allowed Ed to ignore the subtlety of his brother's reactions?

"Alphonse, whatever you gotta say, just say it," he coaxed gently.

The younger looked up at him. "Promise you won't get mad?"

Edward cocked an eyebrow. "Mad? Why would I get mad, Al? Whatever it is that's got you so nervous can't be _that_ bad."

Al shrugged slightly, visibly calming but still feeling nervous inside. "Well, it's just that it's been so long since we've been together, and I didn't know if things were still like before, you know…since I got my body back and all…"

The elder blond smiled and walked over to his brother, throwing his flesh arm around his shoulders. "Listen, nothing's different. Well, not _nothing_, but you know what I mean. Everything's the same as it was. We're still brothers, and you can ask me anything you want. I promise I won't get mad."

The younger alchemist smiled and nodded to say he understood. "Well, it's just that you seem to get lost inside your thoughts quite a bit lately, and I was just wondering what it is that has you staring off into space?"

Edward's eyes widened, partially from surprise that his brother would think he'd be mad about that, and partially because he was embarrassed the younger alchemist had noticed. Was it that obvious, or was Al just perceptive?

"Uh…well…it's just…," he stammered, trying to think of a viable excuse to fend off his brother's suspicions, if only long enough to figure out how to come out and actually say it himself in a way that didn't sound…odd.

Al sighed heavily, shaking his head. "Brother, you don't have to lie. I know everything."

Ed swallowed hard. _Everything?_


	2. Close Call

**A/N: AHHHH!!! A small detail was brought to my attention by the wonderful ****BlackMercifulFaerie****. Seems I didn't explain much about how long Ed and Al had been back home, so there was a huge gap between the end of the movie and the beginning of my story that needed some serious explaining. Thanks a TON, Lina…this totally made a whole chapter I couldn't have covered by myself.**

**Disclaimer: Not mine. Duh. But, I would happily take either of the Elric brothers anytime, because they both look awesomely cuddly and I need something to help me sleep at night. **

"Everything? What're you talking about, Al? There isn't anything to know!"

Edward tried laughing off what his younger sibling had just said as if he was completely oblivious to what it could mean. It was half-true--he really wasn't entirely sure what his brother had meant when he said "everything." Just what was "everything," anyway? There was a lot to know, after all. Edward wasn't just some simple-minded idiot who could be read like a book. No, Edward Elric, Fullmetal Alchemist, was as complicated as the arrays and methods he studied.

Alphonse shot him a look that could not be mistaken. He wasn't fooled in the least. "Brother, you talk in your sleep, and not too quietly, either."

Okay, maybe he _wasn't_ so complicated that his own brother couldn't figure him out. But when had Al heard him talking in his sleep? They hadn't been back in Amestris long. They had only spent a short time on the other side before getting back to their world.

He frowned as he remembered the young gypsy girl who had risked everything to get them home, even though she knew they couldn't take her with them…

_It hadn't taken Ed and Al long to find Huskisson's bomb, though it was apparent to them that Huskisson did not make it himself. His attempt at human transmutation hadn't worked out the way he wanted it to, and thus it had cost him, though his creation had made it through just fine. Of course, it hadn't gone unaccounted for; a country by the name of the "United States of America" was supposedly working on such a thing as well, so they traveled there to find that it was indeed true, and they managed to steal the bomb and escape almost unscathed._

_Needless to say, Edward had to change his automail back into a prosthetic, since it couldn't handle the abuse of the onslaught they suffered after barely escaping back to Germany, where they then hid the bomb until late one night, when Noa had roused Edward from sleep, nearly giving him a heart attack._

"_Noa? Wha…what are you doing? It's nearly…well, I don't know what time it is, but I do know it's too damn early to be up! What's going on?" he complained groggily, trying to shake the sleep from his mind long enough to listen. Noa never usually bothered him at this time of night unless it was important._

"_Sssh, Edward, you'll wake your brother," she whispered, gesturing over to Alphonse, who was sleeping soundly in the bed across the room. She turned back to Ed, a strange expression of mixed excitement and anxiety on her face. "I had a dream," she said simply, sitting on the edge of Ed's bed._

"_A dream?" the blond asked in disbelief, trying to force his already scrambled brain to work just long enough to figure out what it was she was talking about._

_She nodded mutely, before rising and walking out the bedroom door and down the stairs to the kitchen area. Ed, still unsure of what was going on, begrudgingly got out of bed and followed her, quietly shutting the bedroom door behind him so that Alphonse would go undisturbed._

_It hadn't been long that Alphonse and he had been together, a mere six months to be exact, and he still felt a growing unease between them, though he could never bring himself to talk to his brother about it. Still, not much had changed. He still wanted to protect his younger sibling however possible, especially since he was not yet accustomed to the ways of the world they were currently residing in._

_As he reached the kitchen, he sighed, noting that Noa was already making coffee. This meant he probably wouldn't be getting any more sleep that night. He already hadn't been sleeping well as it was. He'd be lucky if he could stay awake and on his feet._

"_So, this dream," he said, sitting down at the table as Noa set a cup of coffee in front of him, "what was it about? It must be pretty important if you thought it couldn't wait until morning,"_

_The Roma girl nodded, sitting across the table from him and folding her hands in front of her, a serious expression crossing her face. Edward could feel his impatience growing. Usually, he was willing to listen to anything she had to say, but he was tired, which meant his already naturally-short attention span was waning quicker than usual. It was then that she said something that snapped him into full alertness more than any amount of caffeinated beverage ever could:_

"_I know a way for you to return home."_

_He had to check several times to make sure he was hearing correctly, which he was. Noa had a dream in which she saw how the uranium bomb could be used in order to close the Gate that they'd held so secret and were still figuring out how to close. In honor of his late partner and friend, Alfons Heiderich, Edward had returned to working on perfecting the model of rocket they themselves had been so proud of._

_Noa had dreamt that the rocket could be used as it had before, to take both Ed and Al to the other side, back home. On their side, she could use the bomb to close the Gate. At first, Edward didn't believe her, but the more she spoke, the more he thought, and the more he thought, the more real it became to him. Even in his vast studies of physics and rocketry, nothing seemed to make more sense to him than the words the woman was speaking…and she knew nothing of science in the least._

_The only thing that was missing from her theory was the alchemy part. In order for them to actually make it through the Gate, there had to be some kind of reaction on the other side. Noa said not to worry, that everything would be all right, and that it would be taken care of, though she didn't say how. He had a feeling he didn't want to know anyway, if it wasn't something she was up to discussing._

_The next day, he told his brother everything of what had been discussed the night before. He wanted Al to know everything, because it concerned him just as much as it did Edward, and he wanted him to have a say in whatever was going on. The younger Elric, of course, was ecstatic._

_With Al's excitement fueling him, Edward automatically started on a simple rocket model to seat two, since the younger of the two had no formal flight training, and it would take up too much time to try and teach him. That, and it would be easier just to do it in one shot. That way, he would feel better knowing his brother was safe with him._

_It didn't take long before the rocket was designed and completed. According to Noa, it was just in time, because just six months later, a year to the day since what Edward referred to as the "Shamballa incident." As the brothers prepared to leave, all the elder could think about was how they were leaving Noa behind. It had taken a little while, but he was really starting to think of the place as his home._

"_This is not home for you, Edward," Noa said softly, holding both of his hands in hers. "Your home is back on the other side of the Gate."_

"_But you…" Ed began, feeling the guilt increasing tenfold with each passing second._

"_My place is here," she interrupted. "I've already been offered a place to stay…with Gracia and Officer Hughes. It won't be so bad, you know. I think we're actually going to get along nicely." She smiled, though he could see in her eyes that she was sad. Those feelings started to manifest in physical form as tears began to well up in her eyes._

_Edward smiled softly. "Aw, don't start crying on my account, Noa. Just think, you'll have less mess to clean up after!"_

_Noa smiled slightly, bringing a hand to Ed's face. "I love you, Edward Elric," she whispered, dropping her hand to her side._

_For a moment, the blond alchemist was stunned. He didn't know quite what to say. He tried to form some kind of words in his throat but he was cut off by a single slender finger to his lips._

_She shook her head slowly, smiling at him wistfully. "You needn't say anything, Edward. I know of your thoughts of another…the man with the dark hair and deep scars, like your own…"_

_Ed bowed his head and looked over to make sure his brother hadn't heard anything of their conversation. Indeed, the younger Elric was busy doing last-minute checks to make sure everything was in order. In the small time that they'd been working on the rocket, Al had learned a lot about them, with as much fervor and curiosity as Edward had when he began._

_He glanced back to Noa and nodded. It was actually his first acceptance of what he himself had already privately confirmed a while back, when he first started having the dreams of his former commanding officer. Still, it felt good to actually admit it to another person, even if that person had no idea who he was talking about._

_She nodded, motioning towards the rocket. "Better get moving. Don't worry, I remember how to do everything as it was done before. I saw it while you were sleeping, remember? So I can take care of everything from here."_

_Edward nodded, remembering vaguely the time she had "borrowed" his knowledge of alchemy while he slept, unbeknownst to him at the time. She had done the same thing with his knowledge of rocketry, though he had specifically told her to do so this time._

_Before he could really wrap his mind around it, he and Alphonse had said their goodbyes, climbing into the rocket and taking off. As they spun through the Gate at unimaginable speed, he wasn't entirely certain of his own calculations as a fear crept into the back of his mind. What if he had been wrong about the entire thing? What if the laws of physics simply did not work in the Gate? What if they had both been wrong, and instead of making it into the other side, they were to be tossed to the dark creatures of the Gate, to be dismembered as their souls remained trapped inside the Gate? Or worse, what if they were destined to be thrown through the swirling mass of blinding colors forever? Edward was certain the rocket wouldn't last that long, for the entire thing was shaking so badly that he imagined it to be much like the ground when the zeppelins had flown over London the first time he had passed through the Gate to the other side. The roaring was much like the explosions as well, and they were almost enough to drown out his brother's whimpers, but he heard them clear enough from where he was sitting._

_He wanted more than anything to reach back and comfort Al, to tell him that no matter what, they were together, and that was all that counted, but before he knew it, they were "landing" in a field not far from what appeared to be Central. Why they had landed outside of Central was completely beyond Edward's comprehension, but before they knew it, they were surrounded by military forces and dropped right in front of a very enthused-yet-confused Lieutenant Riza Hawkeye, who looked as if she didn't know whether to jump for joy or whip out her gun to shoot at their feet. Edward feverishly hoped for the former._

_It wasn't much longer than that when they were both taken back into the military, since technically, Alphonse was still a state alchemist, and Edward really hadn't died, so it only stood to reason that they both be kept. Besides, they were both so skilled at what they did that it would have been foolish to let either or them get away._

_Which eventually led Edward to see him again, where he uttered the words he never should have said. The words he wished vainly he could take back…_

"Brother!" Alphonse said for what seemed like the thousandth time.

Ed shook his head, his brother's calls finally reaching his ears and pulling him out of his musings. Al shook his head sorrowfully at his brother. Surely he was beginning to lose his mind. Maybe it was just one too many trips through the Gate, and in exchange, his brother was becoming a dim-witted, half-brained moron doomed to lose concentration for the rest of his life.

The older, amber-eyed alchemist sighed, ruffling his younger sibling's hair. "You know what, Al? It's nothing to worry about. I just get to thinking about things and I get so wrapped up in it that I forget myself, that's all. I'll try to be more mindful from now on, okay?" He walked over and picked out the book he'd been trying to read before and resumed lying on his bed as he'd been previously.

Alphonse sighed. His brother would have to come out and say it sooner or later. He just hoped that he would do something about his feelings before they started to affect other things as well. He turned and walked back out the door, deciding to take a walk to clear his own mind.

Edward watched as his younger brother walked out of the room. When he was certain he was out of earshot, he sighed audibly. That was far too close. He knew he couldn't hide it forever. Sooner or later, someone was going to find out, and it was sure to end badly.


	3. Old Habits Die Hard

_No, come to think of it, I didn't miss you at all._

Roy Mustang sat at his desk, tapping away at the stack of papers in front of him as if completing it with Morse code instead of writing. It was getting late, and yet, the stack of papers seemed never-ending, and didn't show signs of diminishing anytime soon. For some reason, he hadn't been able to focus for the past couple of days. Ever since he'd gotten back from Liore, he could feel something different about the place he'd left only two weeks before. Everyone seemed…unusually high-spirited. He could have sworn he even caught Havoc whistling, which was something he hadn't done in years. Not since…

That's what should have tipped him off. He was usually sharp-minded about these things, but everyone's seemingly sudden change in attitude had thrown him off balance. He had been completely stumped as to why Lt. Hawkeye hadn't been so apt to shoot at him when he automatically started slacking off on his first day back. Instead, she'd looked at him with a sort of knowing gleam in her eye, and it had made him uneasy. When he'd asked what was up with everyone lately, trying to sound as if it barely bothered him (when it was really driving him up the proverbial wall), she had shrugged and said something about the weather. Roy had not noticed any change in the weather at all, so he found that to be unbelievable.

It eventually nagged at him so badly that he almost considered checking all back records from when he'd been gone, just to see if anything unusual had happed. Whenever he wanted to get down to the bottom of something, he did, and it was usually never good. His self-control got the best of him, however, and he convinced himself that the answer would eventually become apparent to him, as if appearing right in front of his desk.

Sure enough, the answer did appear. Literally. In the form of not one something, but two…two some_ones_, to be exact. Two someones he never thought he'd ever see again. He'd been sure of it.

He shook his head, trying to clear his thoughts. Paperwork needed to be done; he had no _time_ for trying to remember every small detail of what had happened the day before. He didn't have the _time_ to try and figure out how much the young alchemist he'd thought he'd lost years ago had changed--from the way he wore his hair, to the seemingly-more adult clothes he wore, to his subtle height change that only the most meticulous of observers could note…

The dark-haired colonel mentally slapped himself. He couldn't be thinking about him like that _again_, could he? Just when he thought he'd gotten over the hard-to-ignore absence of the younger alchemist, he'd popped--no _flown_--right back into Roy's life as if he'd never been gone at all. As soon as he'd come, however, he was gone again, taking his brother with him. Knowing he was alive should have been enough to help Roy sleep better at night.

It wasn't. In fact, it made it more unbearable, knowing that the blond was somewhere else, living a life that the colonel knew nothing about, in a place where he couldn't protect either of the brothers.

He sighed heavily, finally ceasing the tapping of his pen and laying it down on top of the papers. He wasn't sure if it had been worse having the young alchemists in another dimension, or having them standing in front of his desk the day before, where he was unable to push aside the emotions that were welling up inside him at the sight of both boys.

The change in each of the brothers was more than obvious to anyone who knew them well before. They were both dressed in rough-looking suits, with crisp, white dress shirts peering out from under their heavy jackets. Alphonse was clad in a light beige suit, while the older Elric was suited in a dark olive color. Both boys wore their hair in ponytails, and both of them had grown considerably.

He'd done what he could to maintain a straight face as both of them stood before his desk, Alphonse looking at him with a sort of reverence, while his brother looked irked at having to even be in the same room as him.

_Same old Edward,_ Roy had thought.

_Edward…_ Just _thinking_ his name caused a kind of tension to arise within the older man, for there were so many things he wanted to say to him, but he couldn't even think of where to begin. He did know that the way he had begun had been the wrong way entirely, ending in a way quite opposite the way he'd imagined in his dreams.

"_Didn't take you long to get back here, Fullmetal," he said teasingly. "Did they tire of you already?"_

_Edward scowled, showing his still-existing resentment towards the dark-haired military man. "Isn't it a little early to be making jokes, old man?"_

_No surprise, their first exchange of words had been insults, Roy's light-hearted yet seemingly arrogant, and Edward's bitter and indignant. It was obvious they could go all day in an unending battle of wit and frustration, but Alphonse, being the voice of reason, had broken in, diffusing the tension, if only a little._

"_You wanted to see us, Colonel?" he asked, his tone lighter and lined with the respect his brother simply didn't have._

_Roy sat, stunned for a moment, before Lt. Hawkeye cut in._

"_Sir, perhaps their papers are beneath the stack I placed on your desk this morning," she said pointedly, which really said, "You would have known this was coming if you'd only done your paperwork from yesterday."_

_Roy sighed. Sure enough, beneath the stack of papers he'd been slowly working through that day was a smaller set of papers--a report as to the whereabouts of the Elric brothers since their reappearance only a year earlier. No doubt, Hawkeye had probably constructed a very foolproof alibi, free of any loopholes that could cause someone to question the credibility of the story._

_He nodded to silently confirm to the blonde lieutenant, who was eyeing him suspiciously, that he did indeed find said documents and he glanced over them briefly, before looking back up to the two brothers. Now he had to figure out what to do with them, because he sure as hell wasn't going to let them escape him this time._

"_Well, since I can't very well let you run the streets, I imagine you'll probably have to stay in the barracks until we know just what to do with the both of you," he said nonchalantly, as if he had more important things to worry about than what to do with two teenagers. "I'll get Fuery and Breda to escort you there and make sure everything gets settled."_

_Before Edward could shoot off a smart remark--which Roy knew he was going to, he could see the expression crossing his face, that "I'm going to make life difficult for you if it's the last thing I do" look that Roy knew all too well--Alphonse interrupted him._

"_Thank you very much, sir," he said with a slight bow. However, before he could usher his brother out the door, Edward turned to him and smiled in a way that made Roy a tad uncomfortable. The smile looked almost uncharacteristic for the young alchemist._

"_Hey Al, you mind waiting outside? I got something I really need to talk to the colonel about. I promise it won't take too long," he said, using a tone he reserved only for his younger sibling._

_Alphonse nodded hesitantly, but did as he was asked. After all, he understood his role as the younger of the two, and he fulfilled it without complaint, something Roy had always marveled at. The boy was obedient, but by no means subservient. It wasn't something that had to be worked at, either. It just was. Both boys balanced one another out in a way Roy couldn't help but admire and appreciate. After all, Alphonse did keep Edward out of his hair sometimes. Not that Roy actually minded the blond, but he'd never admit that._

_As soon as the younger brother was gone, Edward turned back to Roy, his expression one of suppressed irritation. "I don't think I need to make it clear that I have no intention of coming back to the military, Colonel. I also don't intend to let Al get sucked back into it either, so don't even try it."_

_Roy was taken aback. Of all the things he could imagine Edward having to say, that wouldn't have been his first choice. Then again, maybe it would have, he just didn't want to admit it._

"_Well, Fullmetal," he said, stressing Edward's alias, "I don't think you realize that you're still technically under contract and can't just come and go as you seem to feel like doing lately."_

"_Under contract? I don't remember signing any damned contract," the blond spat, crossing his arms in defiance. "As far as I'm concerned, the minute you considered me dead was my cue to leave."_

_Roy sighed mentally, doing all that he could not to open the small drawer in the front of his desk and remove his gloves. Since returning to his former position, he'd made a promise to himself: to use his gloves sparingly, and only in times of dire need._

_This was turning out to be one of those times._

_He shrugged, pushing away the amusing mental image of a charbroiled Ed. He'd muse over it later, and maybe actually laugh at it. Now, however, was not the time for such thoughts. He stood from his chair and walked over to the window behind him, looking out. He couldn't look at the younger alchemist if he was going to do what he intended to._

_See, Roy knew exactly what to do to make the blond comply with whatever it was he wanted. He'd known Edward Elric long enough to know what made him tick, and he was going to go for a low blow. It was for the greater good, after all, if not for Roy's own personal amusement._

"_I guess you could leave if you really wanted to, since we don't really need you, and we're not really short of a supply of willing and able bodies around here, so do what you want," he said with an air of indifference._

_If it had been anyone else, they would have caught on to the colonel's obvious ploy. This, however, was not just anyone. It was Ed, and being who he was, all he heard were the words "short" and "able bodies."_

"_WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT EVEN THE MILITARY WOULDN'T WANT HIM?!" Ed shouted, clenching his fists and making what Roy was certain was one of the most comical displays of unnecessary anger he'd ever seen…which was one of the reasons he'd chosen to look out the window._

_That, and the blond was simply too cute when he was fuming._

_The Flame Alchemist smirked, knowing he had Ed right where he wanted him…for now, anyway. He turned back around, trying hard not to look too amused, though he was certain the more amused he looked, the more eager the teen would be to do whatever he could to set his elder straight._

_The dark-haired man shrugged, sitting back at his desk and folding his hands in front of him. All he had to do was wait for Edward's temper to get the best of him, and then things would go back to the way they had been before._

_Almost. The younger alchemist wasn't smart enough to catch on that he was being baited, so he soon found himself reinstated, as well as his brother, but it became obvious that he had gotten much more clever in the past few years, even if he didn't know it._

"_Glad to have you back, Fullmetal," Roy said, filling out the last of the papers necessary to make the Elric brothers officially part of the military once again. "You get a week to get settled before coming to work, so if there's anything you need--"_

"_Don't need any help, thanks," Edward interrupted, looking very piqued, as he had just realized what he'd gotten himself--and his brother, no doubt--into._

_Roy sighed. It'd only been half an hour since the brothers had come in to see him, and already he was getting a nagging sense of déjà vu. He put his signature on the last paper and slid it to the front of his desk. "Make sure you give those to Lt. Hawkeye on your way out. She'll see to it that everything is in order."_

_Ed grabbed the papers in a not-too-delicate way, rolling his eyes. "Yeah sure, whatever."_

_The older man sat back in his chair, crossing his arms, and feeling slightly fatigued from the exertion that had been necessary to get the teen to comply. Though he felt it would ultimately be worth it, he also had a feeling that it was going to cost him dearly--most likely in the form of sleep deprivation or an increase in paperwork…probably both. The fatigue was obviously beginning to affect him, since he felt his usually well-kept defenses sliding just a bit. Either that, or he'd been around the blond too long and the emotions he was trying to keep bottled up were causing his brain to melt._

"_Honestly, Edward, it's been a year since we've seen each other, and a few years before that," he said tiredly. Actually, he knew exactly how long it had been. He'd been counting. Not that he'd admit that, either._

"_And?" Ed said sourly, narrowing his eyes at the colonel, as though expecting another clever assault that might somehow end up getting him in even more trouble._

_Roy sighed heavily for what felt like the millionth time that hour. He made a mental note to stop sighing so much, though he knew he'd probably forget anyway. The teen made him sigh…in more ways than one._

_Mental slap. At this rate, his poor brain was going to be bruised. He was getting tired of riding the emotional elevator. Where could he get off, anyway?_

_Getting off…another mental slap. Roy mentally rolled his eyes. It was a good thing it was just him and the anger-blinded Fullmetal Alchemist in the room. Had someone like say, Riza been in the room, he would have been figured out already._

"_Aaaaand?" Edward repeated irritably, tapping his foot impatiently, and bringing Roy back to reality, which he was all-too grateful for._

"_Aaaaand you'd think we could go for more than five minutes without biting each other's heads off," he finished, sitting up and folding his arms in front of him on the desk. He smirked, feeling a little elation as he watched the blond slowly realize that though he was angry, the older man was right. Roy knew he'd never get Ed to admit it, but just knowing from watching him was enough._

_Of course, being the kind of man he was, he couldn't leave it be. No, he was starting to let his hidden affection for the young prodigy get the best of him, and he ultimately said the very thing that gave the teen the upper hand._

"_C'mon, you had to have missed me just a little," he said, the familiar teasing tone to his voice that he should have known better than to use, but it had been too long and he was just glad to have the blond in his office instead of an entire world away. It was clouding his better judgment._

_Edward appeared to give it some thought for a moment before looking at the colonel and, grinning, said. "No, come to think of it, I didn't miss you at all."_

_It had been a sharp blow to Roy's ego, even if he didn't show it. In all honesty, it had cut him deeper than he was willing to admit, even to himself, though he couldn't say he was surprised at the response._

_The younger alchemist simply turned on his heel and walked out, leaving the dark-haired man to his own self-torturing devices. When he recovered, he'd convince himself that he wasn't bothered by it, as he always did._

Or so he'd thought. Truth was, it still bothered him, more so than he was willing to admit, though he knew he couldn't lie to himself for too long. He never could. There was no sense in trying, anyway. He could run from everyone else, but he couldn't run from himself.

"Colonel Mustang, sir?" Lt. Hawkeye said, standing before his desk expectantly.

How long had she been there? No matter, it wasn't as if he had anything to give her anyway. Somehow, he sensed that she knew that. He nodded and grabbed his jacket that had made its way to the back of his chair, putting it on and pushing the chair in.

"I'll get those tomorrow," he said casually, grabbing his keys to lock up for the night. "I'm going home. See you in the morning." He watched as the woman nodded in understanding and turned to leave for the night herself.

As he turned to close the door behind him, he couldn't help but notice how his office was slowly starting to look as it had not so long ago, before everything had managed to break loose and wreak havoc on his seemingly structured life.

He smirked, locking the door, and heading down the corridor towards the exit, his mind wandering to thoughts of a certain blond alchemist who was no doubt getting settled into the dorms at that moment. He shook his head and sighed, acknowledging that his personal memo did indeed go unnoticed.

Old habits really do die hard.


	4. Rain

**A/N: I know, this is short, and probably pretty boring, but I wanted to draw things out before actually getting to the better part of the story. It wouldn't be very good if I just dove into the crazy parts without doing some kind of annoying inner-psyche torture. Just bear with me. I promise it won't be boring for long.**

**Disclaimer: Pointless to say, but to avoid any kind of offense, I must state that this is not mine, for I have am in no way capable of original thought. I simply borrow what is not mine to use for my own devices in hopes of amusing someone--usually myself. **

Edward was almost certain he hated the rain, though he could never really understand his reasoning behind it. It wasn't that thunderstorms scared him; it was actually the exact opposite. He loved the power that came with thunderstorms, loved to hear the rumbling thunder and watch the lightning chase across the sky. He just hated the rain. It reminded him too much of crying. It was like the sky was crying.

Another thing he hated about the rain is that it always seemed to know when he felt like crying. It was like the sky was mocking him by doing what he himself could not. Edward's brow furrowed. He couldn't remember the last time he cried. It had been awhile, that he knew. When Alfons died…had he cried then? He couldn't remember. Perhaps he had.

Either way, though he didn't cry, he still sometimes felt like doing so. He never could bring himself to do it. He wasn't sure if it was that he was no longer physically capable or if he somehow knew that, if he started crying, he'd never be able to stop.

Yeah, he wanted to cry. He wanted to cry very badly, especially since he'd spent the last couple of days sulking over what he'd said. It had been just a few words, no more than a dozen . . . and he'd said so many more that had been far worse, he was sure. Why did these words bother him so much?

_Because they're lies, and you know it._ Of course. Before had been different. Before he'd left the first time, whenever he'd spoken to the dark-eyed man, even at their last meeting when he'd tried to "commandeer" the vehicle the colonel and Hawkeye had been in, he really did believe that he hated the man. Respected him a little more towards the end, yes, but he still hated him…or so he believed. He no longer thought that to be true and he knew that he had to come clean sooner or later, because he didn't know how much longer he could keep up the act. Plus, he had a feeling Alphonse was going to bring it up again. It wasn't like his brother to press things, but this was no normal circumstance, either.

He didn't know what to do. He'd never felt this way about anyone before, so he didn't really know how to handle things. He was pretty sure that it was not a normal thing, since a) the man was like, twice his age, b) he was his ranking superior in the _military_, and c) he was…well…a _man!_ He was sure no one would understand, including his brother.

But…if his brother already knew, then…well, what was the problem?

Edward shook his head, falling back against his pillow and resigning to staring out the window and watching the rain fall. There was no way he was going to be able to admit it to anyone, let alone the object of said affections. He could only _imagine_ how that would go over. He would just walk over to Mustang's office--no, _skip_—

If he was dreaming, then he might as well make it as _ridiculous_ as possible.

So, he would skip over to Mustang's office, sit—no _stand_ on his desk, and confess everything down to how he had a hard time following what the colonel had said because he wasn't listening; he just liked to watch Roy's lips move.

The blond groaned in exasperation. It was a nice thought, even worth entertaining for a second or two, but he knew how it would really go. He would walk as slowly as possible before lingering around the colonel's door as long as he could until someone finally started inquiring as to what he wanted. Then, he would go into Roy's office, sit in the chair in front of his desk and stare at the floor in front of him until he suddenly "remembered" something he had to do and run out of there as quick as his legs would carry him.

If he _did_ happen to say anything, it would be so incoherent that neither of them would be able to understand it, and that would give the older alchemist yet _another_ thing to use against him. Either way, he lost. It would be best for everyone if he just kept his big mouth shut.

It wasn't as if Mustang would actually feel anything for someone like him anyway, not when he was practically half a person and a complete waste of time. He had ruined enough people's lives as it was; why add another? He felt the familiar tightness wrap around his throat, causing him to swallow the giant lump that was beginning to form behind his Adam's apple. He sniffed and took to staring out the window again.

He really did hate it when it rained.


	5. Do Unto Others

Alphonse loved the rain. Watching the small droplets hit the pavement before him, he couldn't help but dance inwardly as he as he stood beneath the eaves of a building, waiting for the weather to at least clear up a little.

Not that he minded getting wet. No, he loved it, and for months after regaining his memory, he cherished it and every other small thing that most people took for granted. Of course, most people had never known what it was like to be attached to a suit of armor for the better part of four years, either. It seemed like such a small amount of time, really, but it was something he simply couldn't forget.

It was one of the reasons he loved the rain so much. For the longest time, he feared it, worried that his blood seal would wash away, effectively ending what pathetic existence he was leading. Eventually, it became less of an ordeal, but like the cats he loved, he couldn't help but shy away from water at times, out of pure habit.

Al heaved a sigh, leaning against the wall behind him. The walk he'd been taking when it had started raining wasn't helping clear his mind, as he'd hoped it would. He was still extremely conflicted about what to do about his elder brother's odd behavior. He knew Ed had always been a bit…odd, but he was acting more so than was common for him as of late.

At first, he'd thought it might've had something to do with the death of Edward's friend, this Alfons who was supposed to be the "otherworld" image of himself. Al could understand being a little thrown off by the sudden death of someone his brother had grown to be so close to over the few years he'd been there, but there was something not-quite-right about it. After all, they had known Lt. Colonel—nay, Brigadier General—Hughes for quite some time before his death, and his brother hadn't acted that way after they discovered he'd died.

No, there was something else, and Alphonse had been dead-set determined to find out what was making his brother act the way he was. Though he'd been a bit wary of her at first, he eventually asked Noa for her aid in helping him find out what was up with Ed. He'd known that she would be able to find out something; according to his brother, she could "see things" just by touching a person. Though he'd seen some extraordinary things throughout his young life, he'd been a little skeptical about the supposed powers of the woman, but he'd always thought that a little help never hurt anyone.

What he hadn't counted on was the kinds of things she would discover. In fact, if he'd been asked to make a list of all the things his brother could have been hiding, the fact that Ed harbored feelings for a certain Flame Alchemist would have been at the very bottom of that list, if even on it at all.

It wasn't that Alphonse minded; in fact, he was more than thrilled for his brother, who had never shown affection for anyone—at least, not _that_ kind of affection. Sure, a couple times the younger Elric thought his brother had feelings for their childhood friend, Winry Rockbell, but it was made clear to him soon after arriving on the other side of the Gate as a "stowaway" that Ed had nothing but platonic tendencies towards the female mechanic.

All in all, it was a good thing for him, since he'd developed a bit of a crush for the girl over time and it was just easier on him if he didn't have to compete with his brother. Not that he was worried about winning; when it came to competitions with his brother, he always won for some reason. But, even still, he didn't like to compete with his older brother, not even a little. They were too close for that.

He frowned, shoving his hands into his trouser pockets. He couldn't lie, no matter how hard he tried. Though he could remember being extremely close with his brother at one time, he couldn't help but feel a wedge between them. But what was it for? Guilt? Anger? Was there another secret Noa had failed to mention?

No, if there had been no mentioning of such a thing, it was most likely intentional, which irked Al just a bit. It wasn't as if he was a child anymore. He could handle things just fine.

_Like how you handled your brother earlier?_

Alphonse mentally rolled his eyes at his inner-voice, which sounded suspiciously like one trapped inside a metal suit of armor. He shrugged it off as best he could. What was he supposed to do, anyway…tie Edward to his bed and threaten to feed him milk every hour if he didn't confess? Somehow, the younger Elric doubted that would go over well. He could still beat his brother in a sparring match, but he hadn't come up against a desperate Ed trying to avoid the two things Al was sure he hated most: admitting to having feelings for the dark-haired colonel (other than complete loathing), and milk.

"What to do…," he murmured to himself, tapping his foot against the pavement, as if the cadence would bring some kind of epiphany. The way he saw it, he had a few options. He could go back to the dorm and force the truth out of his brother (it would take some work, but he was a patient guy), wait for Edward to say something himself (not likely), forget he ever knew about it (less likely), or…

_You could go straight to the colonel and tell him yourself._

Alphonse snorted derisively. There was no way he would get away with that. It presented a multitude of problems. First off, he had no confirmation from his brother that it was actually true. Though he did trust Noa's word—for how could she possibly know about Mustang in the first place?—he had to be certain that it was true before causing any trouble. Besides, whether it was true or not, his brother would kill him if he told, no questions asked. The young alchemist was not too keen on the possibility of being attached to another suit of armor.

Of course, Edward would never actually do that . . . but he would certainly show his unappreciative disposition towards the action and it would undoubtedly be directed at Alphonse. In other words, he'd probably invoke the only other rule besides equivalent exchange that they'd ever considered worth following: the Golden Rule.

_Do unto others…_

He could only imagine how that would pan out: his brother, without a doubt, knew about Al's fondness for his automail mechanic and would waste no time in placing a call to Resembool.

No, he definitely couldn't tell Colonel Mustang a thing. At least, not yet…not until he got an inkling of an indication that Noa had been right, and that his brother really did feel something for their commanding officer. When he did figure everything out for himself, though, he was definitely going to tell. He was going to run and tattle on his brother like he had when they were younger, only this time, he hoped that Edward wouldn't be angry. Even if he was, it wouldn't last long. They could never stay mad at each other. They were brothers. They had to take care of one another, just like Mom said.

_Mom…_

A couple of kids ran by, their feet hitting a puddle and causing some water to hit Al's legs. He grinned and looked up towards the sky to see a rainbow beginning to form in the parting clouds.

Yes, Alphonse really did love the rain.


	6. Confessions

**A/N: Ha! Sorry, just getting some sneak kudos in here. I thought I'd add this _after_ my beta went through it…just in case she should happen to look over this again. So…thank you, thank you very much. I always look back on the things you change and think to myself, "Wow…that was a smooth one. If Lina didn't catch it, you would look like a _total_ idiot." You're basically like, my idiotic-mess filter, so to speak. Thanks for being the best beta ever. Double thanks to my super-awesome reviewers. If I didn't get such wonderful reviews, I would have no drive to actually continue with something to see it through to completion. Thanks a ton.**

**I don't know if you've heard this, but I actually don't own FMA. I _know_, hard to believe, isn't it? I do, however, own three DVDs and an annoying amount of fan art. My devart link is in my profile if you wanna take a peek. Thanks.**

Edward sat on his bed, his flesh leg tucked beneath him and the automail appendage straight out in front of him. He hated to admit it, but sometimes his automail could be a real pain in the butt…_literally_. Which was how he figured out that sitting cross-legged was no longer a good idea. He sighed and closed the book he was reading as he finished it, setting it on top of the other books he'd read that day. Glancing over at the ever-growing stack of literature that had accumulated next to his bed, he shook his head, almost feeling frustrated by the sight.

Though he liked his free time, he was really itching to get something done. He'd never been one to just sit in one place for too long, yet that's all he seemed to be doing lately. He would have gone to HQ by now, but every time he made a move towards acting on that notion, his own imagination quickly put out any ideas of leaving the room, let alone the barracks. He could only picture himself standing before Mustang, babbling like an idiot.

Ed pinched the bridge of his nose irritably. He was beginning to think he'd taken one too many trips through the Gate and it was starting to affect his brain. That thought alone made the headache he had from all the reading worsen. He yawned lazily and looked over at the clock on the wall. It had stopped raining an hour ago, and Al had gone out a little before that. He vaguely wondered what was taking his younger brother so long.

He shrugged, deciding that it wasn't that big a deal, since he knew very well that Alphonse was getting to the age where he didn't really need a babysitter anymore and Edward knew his sibling could take care of himself. After all, he had taken care of the both of them for years. There was no reason to think that he needed any help from Edward.

Al probably didn't need him for anything anymore.

The metal-limbed alchemist sprawled out on his bed, burying his face in his pillow and taking a deep breath. He hated thinking that he and his brother were growing apart, since he couldn't imagine being without him, especially after all they'd been through together. But…he'd been without Al for the few years they lived on separate sides of the Gate, and they'd both done all right for themselves, hadn't they? He'd missed his brother terribly, but that hadn't stopped him from trying to lead a normal existence, had it?

He shrugged to no one in particular and closed his eyes, feeling the urge to sleep creep up on him. No, he had nothing to worry about at the moment. For now, he and Al were together. That's all that mattered. There was no sense in worrying about when they would inevitably separate. They'd cross that bridge when they came to it…or maybe, Ed would just burn it. A peaceful smile started to form on his face as he slowly slipped into slumber.

When he finally woke up, it was dark. He looked around the room, waiting for his eyes to adjust. When things started to become easier to see, he sat up, swinging his legs over the side of the bed. He hated how foreign the automail felt to him. It wasn't that he wasn't used to it—he was just used to _Winry's_ work. What could he say? He was brand-picky about some things, and his automail just happened to be one of them. He made a mental note to place a call in to Resembool in the morning. He had a feeling it wouldn't be necessary, since word traveled faster than people these days, but he'd call anyway.

As he scanned the darkened room, he made out the rising-and-falling silhouette of his brother sleeping in the next bed. He'd probably gotten in while Edward was asleep and, in true Alphonse style, didn't want to wake his older sibling.

Ed smiled. He almost wished everyone could be as thoughtful as his baby brother. The world would probably be a better place. No, it would most _definitely_ be a better place.

He was about to stretch out and try to go back to sleep when he saw movement over in his younger sibling's general direction. He glanced over to see that Alphonse had woken up and was watching him intently, as if waiting for him to do something.

To be honest, it kinda freaked him out. Not that he was bothered by his brother's observation of him, but the idea that he was watching him in the dark and not saying a word…now that bothered him.

Thankfully, the silence didn't last long, as it was in Ed's nature to break it (among other things). He cleared his throat.

"Uh, hey Al…you awake?" he asked stupidly, though he already knew the answer.

He thought he saw Alphonse nod, but that was of no consequence, since it was soon followed with a quiet "yeah."

"You awake?" Al asked timidly, slowly moving to sit upright.

Normally, Edward would have balked at such a ridiculous inquiry, but there had been many of those kinds of moments between the brothers since they'd been reunited the year before. It seemed like neither of them could think of what to say. Either that or they both had something to say and just didn't know how to say it.

A giant rift had been created between the once-close siblings—one that the older Elric was determined to overcome. After all, he was Edward Elric, Fullmetal Alchemist. There had never been a case he couldn't solve, no mystery that could elude him. It wasn't going to be any different in this instance. There had been too much that had happened to and between them for a small matter of a couple years' separation to best them.

He didn't sigh, nor roll his eyes, nor make any indication that he was irritated by his brother's pointless reiteration. He simply replied with a much less timid "yeah."

He stretched his legs out and stood up, making his way to the other side of the room, where his brother still sat in silence. Ed sat down next to Al, leaning against the wall and tucking the knee of his flesh leg up against his chest. The stars and light reflected from the moon illuminated the night sky, shining beams of soft light down through the curtains of the tiny window of their room. The light allowed Edward to see the quizzical look on his brother's face, causing him to smirk in amusement.

"What? I can't come sit next to my brother?" he asked humorously, nudging Al's arm lightly. "You'd think for all the times you invaded my bed in the middle of the night when we were kids that I'd get at least one chance to invade yours."

Al smiled lightly, nudging Ed back a little harder than he'd been nudged. "Well, we were kids. You're a little old to be crawling into people's beds in the middle of the night, don't you think?"

_When did Al get a sense of humor?_ The older blond shoved the thought aside and grinned, poking his brother in the ribs, which caused the younger teen to let out a high-pitched yelp.

"Ow! Hey!" he squeaked, rubbing his side. A wide grin flashed across his face, and in a split second, he launched from his spot beside his older brother to tackle him, causing them both to roll off the bed and onto the floor, where they wrestled until Al finally got the best of Ed. He pinned his brother's arms to the ground with his knees, taking special care to press harder on the automail limb without crushing the flesh one.

Edward sighed, knowing he'd been beaten. "It seems it doesn't matter what kind of body you have. I lose anyway." He smiled to assure his younger sibling that he wasn't sore about having lost.

Alphonse simply shrugged and rolled aside, sprawling out on his back next to Ed. A silence settled between the two for a few moments before Al spoke up again.

"Brother," he said softly, his voice reflecting the inner conflict he'd been dealing with for the past few months, "could I ask you something?"

The older alchemist looked over at his brother, surprised that he'd ask such a thing. "We've been through this, Al. You know you can ask me whatever you want."

The younger Elric suddenly felt nervous. Ever since before he'd gotten back, he'd been trying to think of a way to ask Ed what had been on his mind since Noa had told him of what she had seen in Ed's dreams.

_Do you like—_no, the word "like" only made it seem like less than it really was—_do you have feelings for Colonel Mustang?_ How hard could it be to ask such a simple question, anyway?

Obviously, there was some degree of difficulty to it, because Al couldn't seem to say anything without feeling the words catch in his throat.

Edward sat up and looked down at him, the expression on his face one of concern. "What is it, Al? Something wrong?"

Alphonse shook his head, trying to gather the nerve to say what was on his mind. He'd just…take it slow, one…word…at…a…time…

"Brotheryou'dneverhideanythingfrommewouldyou?" he asked, his words slurring together as he rushed to get the question out.

Edward cocked his eyebrow, wondering what it was that had just happened. He didn't think he'd ever heard his brother speak that fast in his entire life. "Wait, what did you just say?"

The younger teen groaned, reaching up to rub his eyes. Ed, knowing all of his brother's odd habits, reached up and moved his hand away from his face.

"Nu-uh…hand away from the face…tell me what you said," he said slowly, trying to remain calm. One thing that bothered him was the fact that his brother had been holding something in; however, even worse than that was that he seemed almost too nervous to talk to Edward about it. Sure, Al was naturally a little on the shy side, but when it counted, he usually was the first to speak up (well, when Ed didn't beat him to it that is).

Al sighed, clasping his hands together and rubbing his thumbs against each other nervously. He knew that it was now, or…well, _now_. He and his sibling weren't that different when it came to figuring things out. Sure, Ed was a little more oblivious, but eventually he'd find out what was eating at the once armor-bodied teen.

He forced himself to look his worried brother in the eye. However, upon finding that it was too difficult, he simply cast his eyes to the floor. "Um…Brother…y-you…you wouldn't ever…we tell each other everything, right?"

He looked up at Edward, who was staring at him with a confused expression.

_Typical Brother_, he thought in frustration.

The older blond frowned and looked away, surprising his sibling. "As much as I'd like to think that, Alphonse, I know it's not true," he muttered. "A lot has happened in the time that we were on opposite sides of the Gate. There are probably a lot of things you've done that I don't know about, and there are things I've done that you don't know about." He sighed heavily, as if trying to relieve some kind of weight on his chest. "That's the way it has to be sometimes, I guess. We're both going to do things that we won't tell each other about. That's part of growing up…leading separate lives…" He smiled sadly, finally admitting the one thing he'd been denying for years. "We can't always be together, you know."

Alphonse was taken aback by his brother's words. He'd been expecting something completely different. He did notice how Edward seemed lighter after having said those words. It was almost as if…that's what he'd been trying to say all along…

Al smiled and did something he hadn't done in awhile: he sat up and wrapped his arms around Ed's waist, burying his face into the crook of his neck. He hugged his brother and fought the tears that were beginning to well up. He'd been so caught up in how different things were that he hadn't taken the time to really appreciate the fact that they were together again. It might not be forever, but he'd take what he could get.

Edward's mouth turned up into a small smile as he returned the embrace, making small circles on his younger brother's back with his automail hand and smoothing Al's hair with his flesh hand. He made soft hushing sounds, knowing that right now, his precious baby brother was probably fighting back tears.

He was right. As if on cue, Al's small body began to shake as he sobbed into his brother's chest. Ed tightened his hold and waited for the teen to calm down. Finally, the shaking lessened, and the sound of sobbing was replaced by muffled sniffling.

"I don't want you to leave, Brother," Alphonse said softly. "I know that we can't always be together, but we just got home. I don't want to separate yet."

"Hey," Ed said softly, pulling back and tilting Al's chin up to look at him, "you don't have to worry about that anytime soon. There is no way we're going our own ways just yet. We have to work together, remember?" He grinned, trying to lighten the mood. "Besides, someone has to keep me from killing Mustang, right?"

Al's eyes widened slightly. He'd forgotten all about what he'd wanted to ask his brother before. Somehow, it didn't seem as difficult a task as before. He nodded, looking Ed directly in the eye.

"But we both know you wouldn't, would you Brother?" he asked bluntly.

Ed's eyes widened and he laughed nervously, scratching the back of his head. "Uh…heh…sure I would, Al! Give me the chance, and I'd pound him into his own desk!"

As the thought crossed his mind, it was followed by another thought that made his cheeks flare.

_Pound him into his own…geez, why did I have to say _that _of all things?!_ he screamed in his mind.

"Are you all right?" Al asked, looking at his sibling with concern.

Ed nodded quickly. "Yeah, I'm fine! Why wouldn't I be okay?"

The younger alchemist rolled his eyes. This was getting to be ridiculous, even for Edward. He was certain now that what Noa had discovered was accurate, and the sooner his brother confessed, the better he'd feel.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Ed asked, finally calming enough to realize that a pair of hazel eyes were shooting him a very skeptical look.

Alphonse sighed and shook his head in pity. The only way to deal with Ed, it seemed, was to confront him directly.

_Always the hard way, Brother…_he thought crossly.

He crossed his arms and stared his sibling down. "You don't have to hide it from me. I already know how you really feel about the colonel, so you don't have to pretend anymore."


	7. Tonguetied Trouble

Ed looked floored. A thousand thoughts raced through his mind as he tried to figure out how his brother could have possibly found out about what he'd thought he'd been hiding so well.

Obviously, the fact that he was baffled as to what to do next amused his younger sibling endlessly, a look of satisfaction gracing Al's gentle features and making him look ages older. It was somewhat disconcerting.

"B-but…you…I…," Edward managed, desperately trying to find the words that would save his skin.

The younger Elric shook his head in pity, not believing a word that was—or rather, _wasn't_—coming from his brother's mouth. A small part of him actually considered dropping the subject, or at the very least, saving it for another time when his sibling was better equipped to defend himself. However, the still-childish part of him that loved to see his older brother squirm would have none of it. A mischievous grin formed across his lips, completing the expression of triumph that had settled upon his face and causing the now-completely confounded older alchemist's nerve to promptly drop through the floor.

Anyone who walked in would find the situation highly entertaining.

Ed, however, wasn't entirely convinced. He crossed his arms, resorting to the only defense he believed he had left, which was, of course, denial.

"Listen, I don't know what you _think_ you know, Al, but there is nothing for me to pretend about. Nothing at all! I don't know what makes you think that I would feel anything remotely resembling affection of any kind for that arrogant bastard!" he shouted defiantly.

Al tried to hold back the laugh that was threatening to burst from his throat as he made a slight attempt to keep his brother from doing that which he did so well: making a complete idiot out of himself by letting his mouth run away with him.

Too late.

"Affection?" the younger Elric chuckle-coughed. "Who said anything about affection? For all you know, I could have been talking about respect, or some kind of fondness." He finally stopped laughing and settled for just smiling sympathetically at his sibling.

Once again, Edward was dumbfounded. The only two things he could think of were, number one: when had Al gotten so much _smarter_ than him? And two: what was he supposed to say to something like that? No words came to him that sounded anything less than guilty. He might as well wave a white flag in self-defense to keep himself from doing anything more damaging.

Suddenly, the proverbial light came on. That was it. He could just tell Al that sure, he had something for their commanding officer. He didn't have to go into details or anything. For all Al knew, it was just a small crush, a passing phase of sorts…instead of the full-blown, mind-boggling, heart-wrenching infatuation that it really was.

Ed sighed, trying to sound defeated. He shrugged, leaning against the side of the bed and drawing his flesh knee to his chest. He tried to look as if deep in thought, when he really had everything he wanted to say already on the tip of his tongue. He took a deep breath, and began his verbal tap dance around the truth.

"Well damnit…I don't know what to say, Al," he said softly, starting out slow to make it appear as if he was struggling for words. "I mean, you're right. You are totally right. I just…" He cast his eyes to the ground, tracing an array on the floor next to him with his automail hand. He frowned deeply, knowing that this, plus what he was going to say next, was going to be the very thing that got him out of the tough spot he'd managed to get himself into.

_Mental note, more yelling, less spacing out, at least around Mustang,_ Ed thought to himself. His frown deepened at the thought of the older man. _Stupid bastard, getting me into this mess. I swear, next time I see him, I am going to—_

"Brother?" Al asked quietly, urging Edward to continue.

The older blond sighed, knowing that it was time to deliver the ending blow. He hated having to do this to his own brother, but it was the only thing he could do, at least until he had things better figured out.

"Al, you don't…you don't hate me, do you?" he asked quietly, biting his lower lip for better effect.

Alphonse's eyes widened in surprise. "Brother, you haven't asked me that since…" He thought back to when his soul was still incased within the suit of armor. Edward had looked at him so guiltily it had nearly torn him in two. He still couldn't believe that he'd actually considered that his brother would do something like fabricate his memories. He should have had more faith in Edward than that. Even after all they'd been through, he still felt guilty about thinking that his brother had done something like that.

He looked back up at Edward, who had that same look of guilt on his face. He swallowed hard, unsure of what to say. His brother had done horrible things before, but that hadn't changed the way Al felt about him. He would always love his big brother, no matter what. Why would Ed think that he'd change his mind now? Just because he happened to have feelings for the colonel?

Al shook his head, partially in response, but mostly out of pity. "Brother…Edward," he said, using his first name to further emphasize the importance of what he was going to say. He waited until his brother's head snapped up at the use of his name to continue. "No matter what you do, no matter how many buildings you blow up, or villages you get us thrown out of, or angry mobs you get to chase us…no matter how bad things get, I could never hate you. I wouldn't care if you attached my soul to another suit of armor—hell, you could even attach my soul to a coffee can for all I care. I could never, _ever_ hate you."

Edward stared at him in awe. "Alphonse…" he said softly, his eyes drifting down to the floor as he smiled softly.

The smaller teen shook his head. "No. No more talk of me hating you. I don't care who you love, just as long as you're happy."

Ed felt warmth spread through him at his brother's words. "Al, you don't know how that makes me feel…" He paused, the words finally having sunk in. "Wait, _love?_ What makes you think that I _love_ Roy?"

Al glanced up at him, a smirk forming across his lips. "Why Brother, I don't think I ever implied that you did. And since when did you call Colonel Mustang by his first name instead of an obscenity?"

Edward cursed himself mentally. The more he talked, the more trouble he seemed to get himself into. Sometimes he wondered how he and Al were even related. Al was always so quiet and patient, and he…well, he had a tendency to run off at the mouth a little too often. Perhaps it would be wise if he didn't say much else. Still, in being silent, he was practically playing into his brother's hands.

"I just—" he began quietly.

Al shook his head firmly. "No, don't worry about it. It's all right, Brother. Like, I told you, you don't have to pretend anymore."

"H-how long…?" Ed asked shakily.

"I've known for awhile now," the younger alchemist admitted, bowing his head, ashamed.

"Yes, I assumed that," Edward said, giving up on any attempts to try and convince his brother what he knew was a lie. "But I mean…how _long_?"

Alphonse thought carefully, trying to calculate the time in his head. He finally settled on a relatively accurate number. "About four months, perhaps five."

"Five months?" the older teen asked in disbelief. "You knew about this for five months, and you've managed to keep quiet about it?"

Al's brow furrowed and irritation began to flare inside of him as his usually-enduring patience started thinning. "Keep _quiet_ about it? You say that as if I run around running my mouth all the time! Trust me, it wasn't easy keeping your secret. I don't know what was harder, keeping it, or finding out about it in the first place!" He shook his head in frustration. "I mean, I didn't think too much of it when you were talking in your sleep, but then it really started to bother me after you started spacing out on me all the time. I actually asked Noa to help me because I was so worried about you."

Edward's eyes widened. He didn't know if he was more bothered by the fact that his brother had gone behind his back to find out something he wanted to keep secret, or if his silence about said secret had forced his brother to go to Noa. He'd known from the moment he relayed the story of how the Thule society had used him and their father to open the Gate and how Noa had taken his knowledge of alchemy while he was sleeping…he'd known how Alphonse had felt towards her. The look on his face had said it all.

_You hurt my brother. I don't trust you._

He frowned, lines deepening in his face, making him appear much older, if only for a moment.

"Brother?" Al asked quietly, a look of concern on his face. He was looking at Ed as if in a kind of panicked apology. "I'm sorry. I didn't know what I was saying. I wasn't—"

The older blond shook his head in argument. "No Al, you're right. You haven't ever given me any reason to think you'd do something like that. It was wrong of me to act like you would. I'm the one who should be sorry. I am sorry. For as long as you've kept this secret from me, I've kept my own secrets that much longer."

"You trust me, don't you, Brother?" Alphonse asked quietly.

Edward almost laughed in disbelief. _Almost_. "Of course I do! It's just…some things…aren't meant to be shared with others. You know?"

The younger Elric nodded in understanding. Yes, he could understand why his brother wouldn't want to talk about what he felt for a certain dark-haired man for several reasons; fear of rejection would probably top that list. Of course, he would never reject his brother, not ever. But other people…that was another thing all together.

Some people would never understand.

But Alphonse wasn't "some people." He understood that sometimes love had this odd way of winding around a person, causing them to gravitate to other, often less likely individuals. His poor brother had fallen prey to such a thing.

He offered a small smile of reassurance to his older, now-concerned sibling. "Don't worry, Brother. It's going to be all right, just like you said. Let's just get some sleep. We have a long day tomorrow, so we'll need to be rested."

A look of relief crossed Edward's face. He was never so grateful for an excuse to end a conversation.

He nodded in agreement. "Good idea, Al." Glancing back over at his younger brother, he smiled in gratitude for the suggestion. "We can talk some more tomorrow."

As Al watched Edward climb into bed and settle into sleep, he smiled softly. That smile turned into a small frown as he thought of what he must do next.

"Yes…we can talk tomorrow, but not before I take care of something first," he murmured into his pillow, turning to face the wall. As much as it would feel like treason to him, Alphonse knew that he had to do something to help ease his brother's confusion.

_You can't hide forever, Brother._


	8. Secret's Out

Roy was used to unexpected visitors. In a weird contradictory way, he almost expected unexpected visitors. Still, though he had seen much in his military career, some things occasionally had a way of surprising him.

Like glancing up to see a very distressed-looking Alphonse Elric standing before his desk, fidgeting nervously.

Roy could help but laugh inwardly at how different the two brothers really were. Then again, he remembered a time when Ed was not so different from the way his brother was now. He smirked as the memory of a call placed before the boys boarded a train to come to Central. In a fortunate twist of fate, he'd managed to get the Elric brothers on the same train as General Hakuro. Coincidentally (or not so coincidentally, as luck would have it), the train was also transporting a group of wayward terrorists who would become a main factor in getting a twelve-year-old Edward Elric into the State Alchemy Exams. Many would later claim that Roy'd had a hand in that turn of events, including Edward himself, but the reticent colonel would neither confirm nor deny that fact.

He held back a heavy sigh threatening to escape from his lungs. That was a much simpler time, back when he was "Lt. Colonel Mustang, sir"—not that he'd ever want to go back to that rank—and not "Colonel Bastard," or whatever derogatory name Ed had thought up that day.

Those times were definitely easier on him. There was less pressure on him, and he could do as he pleased, working hard but still reaping rewards without gaining too much attention. He wished vainly sometimes that he could go back to a time when things were like that: when the brothers were less stained by the corruption of the world, when his biggest threat of the day was Hawkeye's gun, when all of his problems could be solved with a simple call to Maes Hughes…

Back before he even loved Edward.

Roy shook his head. It was hard to determine the exact moment when his feelings towards the young prodigy had made the transition from subordinate to friend to…well, whatever one could call it. "Love interest" just seemed unfitting, somehow. He doubted that he'd ever really seen the smaller male as just another person working beneath him, or a tool to be used to help him ascend the ranks.

No, he _knew_ that was never the case. From the moment he laid eyes on the golden-haired youth as he lay peacefully in his bed, barely conscious and seemingly helpless, Roy couldn't help but feel a pang of sympathy and even admiration for him.

Still, for the longest time, he'd denied seeing Edward as anything more than a kid he felt compelled to help for whatever reason.

That is, until he disappeared, leaving only a ten-year-old Alphonse, a flesh-and-blood reminder of all the things Roy loved most about him. Of course, Roy never really gave up the ghost and believed with the rest of the world that Edward was dead. He just couldn't bring himself to accept it.

In fact, it was partially because of that belief that Roy had been so adamant about the younger Elric taking the State Alchemy Exams (or rather, finishing them—but the young boy couldn't recall taking the exams the first time around). It was all because, once again, the clever military man was pulling strings from the sidelines to assure his own desired outcome.

Of course, even Roy hadn't realized his true motives for helping the boy at the time. He'd thought it was because he was fond of the boy and felt it only fitting that he should follow in his brother's legendary footsteps. It was only later, after careful examination, that he understood why he had stuck around long enough to see that Alphonse became a state alchemist.

He'd believed that Edward was alive, and if he could be found, then his brother would find him.

And find his brother Alphonse did. When Roy first caught sight of the older Elric after his return to their side of the Gate, it had only confirmed what he had suspected all along…

He had fallen for Edward Elric. He, Roy Mustang, who had once been known for his numerous romantic conquests, had fallen head-over-heels in love with his subordinate, a mere _boy_ more than ten years his junior.

Oh, of all the hands for cruel fate to have drawn him…

At first, he'd been slightly appalled, sickened at the thought that not only did this make him gay, but a pedophile and fraternizer as well. After a short period of self-justification, however, he found that it really wasn't all that bad. He wasn't necessarily _gay_, because he didn't like men. He just liked Edward, who, for all his raging hormones, mood swings, small stature, and long hair, was actually more like a woman than he'd care to admit. Not to mention that he technically wouldn't be a pedophile, since Ed had already come of age. No, Ed wasn't jailbait and Roy wasn't a sick, twisted, middle-aged man going through a mid-life crisis. As for the fraternizing, well…

Roy was _very_ good at keeping secrets.

Besides, love had always been a rather evasive thing to him, so who was he to question it when it finally came along, grabbed him by his uniform, and shook him so violently that he was almost certain his brain had fallen out in the process?

Certainly his brain had to have fallen out. He was in love with _Edward_, of all people.

After that realization, that understanding of his own feelings towards the hot-headed alchemist, it had nearly torn him in two to let the blond go, knowing that he would probably never be seen again.

Still, he watched him go, and even gave his younger brother a chance to go with him at the last second. Maybe it had been more for his own sake than that of the brothers. The last thing he'd needed at the time was a reminder of the love that he'd found, only to be forced to let it go.

As luck would have it, that wouldn't be the last he'd seen of the Elric brothers, for little more than a year later, they'd returned, giving Roy the chance to at last resolve the issue of his unyielding affection towards Ed.

Of course, this, like so many of Roy's other problems, was not so easily dealt with. Things seemed to go right back to where they had begun, only with a few minor differences. Some of these things were rather disconcerting in nature. Either Edward really had grown up during his time on the other side of the Gate, or he was just getting soft, because his insults weren't nearly as harsh has they once had been.

Then again, something as simple as not being missed seemed to hurt to Roy, so it wasn't really all that different. In fact, that small sentence had wounded him far more than any of the ridiculous taunts the metal-limbed alchemist seemed to throw out at random.

_No, come to think of it, I didn't miss you at all…_

The thought that such a simple thing could affect him so deeply was almost irritating to Roy.

Another thing was that was troublesome was the fact that the Elrics seemed almost…forced apart by an unseen barrier of some kind. Maybe it was the result of being apart for so long. Maybe they'd just grown up and no longer depended on one another as they had before.

Looking at the teen nervously standing before his desk, Roy noted how true that probably was. Alphonse had physically changed a great deal, having grown taller and a little broader about the shoulders, his hair cut short instead of the long ponytail similar to his older sibling's that he'd donned once before. However, he also seemed to have changed in ways that were not so easily seen by the naked eye. He had an air of independence about him, as if he'd never really needed his brother in the first place.

At that moment, a thought occurred to Roy. Though the two young men seemed distant, they had still refused to be separated under any circumstances. If that really was so, then what was Alphonse doing in his office, and where was Ed?

"Hello, Alphonse," Roy said slowly, figuring it would be best not to startle the boy, who looked as if he could bolt from the room at any moment.

"C-colonel Mustang, sir," Alphonse responded timidly.

At hearing the youth's voice, Roy cocked an eyebrow in curiosity. What had him so nervous? He hadn't ever really seen Al like this. Well, if one didn't count the times when he was still attached to that suit of armor.

You never really could tell when a suit of armor was nervous, after all…

"You don't really have to report for a few more days," Roy said, looking back down at his papers, partially because he wanted Al to feel more at ease, and partially because Hawkeye had taken to firing rounds at him again whenever he showed signs of lagging behind. Since he could now use both his eyes again, he could see it coming, but that didn't stop him from being slightly nervous whenever he saw an irritated Riza reach towards her holster.

Being shot in the head once was quite enough for him, thank you.

"I know," Alphonse said quietly, looking down at his feet.

The silence that ensued was almost more than Roy could bear, still having been used to Edward's seemingly random outbursts of anger. There was definitely something wrong, and it wasn't just him, but he couldn't figure out what it was. Had Al and Ed fought, and now Al wanted to leave? That was unlikely. Was there something that the boys needed and Ed had sent Al to ask, putting him up like some kind of martyr to be sacrificed? That seemed even less likely. Ed was never one to really beat around the bush when he wanted something, especially when it came to asking Roy about it (in which case, he really wasn't _asking_ for it so much as _demanding_ it).

"My brother doesn't know I'm here," Al said suddenly, drawing Roy's immediate attention.

So he came _without_ Ed, _unbeknownst _to Ed. Under any other circumstances, Roy would find that absurdly uncharacteristic of the usually obedient teen, but he knew that during the time his brother was missing, Alphonse really had learned to handle things himself. He looked as if he almost preferred it most times. Without the memories of his journey with Edward in search of the stone, he had gone out into the world naïve and unafraid, obtaining his own sense of self in the process. With his brother, he'd been one half of a pair. Alone, however, he stood steady and strong, able to handle whatever was thrown at him. It was apparent that the sense of independence he'd gained had not faded with the return of his memories.

Roy decided to play ignorant, hoping to find out what had brought the young and nervous alchemist to stand before him, looking as if he was stepping on glass.

"Oh?" he asked, folding his hands in front of him. "Won't he be worried about where you've gone off to?"

Alphonse shook his head. "No, sir."

Roy found that to be a bit odd. For as long as he had known them, the brothers had been nearly inseparable. Any time that Alphonse had gone somewhere without informing Edward, it usually ended with the older of the two putting the entire staff into a panic looking for his brother.

Yet, there was Alphonse, standing before Roy, acting as if it was a normal occurrence for him to be there without Edward standing nearby. There was nothing to be gained in trying to figure it out himself, however, so Roy decided to take a more direct course of action.

"Well, is there anything I can help you with?" he asked simply, trying to sound helpful and not annoyed. Sure, with Edward, he loved to see how much he could rile the other up, but with Alphonse, there wasn't really anything in it for him. Plus, it was a pretty moot point, since he had only seen the younger male get angry on barely a handful of occasions. Once again, he was a suit of armor most of those times, and not everyone could read the animate mass of metal like Edward.

Alphonse seemed disturbed for a moment as a very unusual expression crossed his usually peaceful face. It was an expression Roy himself knew all too well. But it made no sense…why would Alphonse feel _guilty?_ Sure, the look was a thing seen often on the face of his older brother, but Roy could not think of a single reason why the younger of the two would ever feel such an emotion.

"I…well…you see, uh…," Al stammered, unable to neither come up with the words he needed, nor say it directly as he wanted. It was really quite the sight to behold, watching the teen stammer nervously. It was just so uncharacteristic of him. When it came to dancing around a subject, Alphonse waltzed. He could gracefully avoid a subject that he wasn't comfortable with and no one would be the wiser.

This subject, however, had Al tripping over himself like he had two left feet. Finally, the proverbial light bulb appeared overhead and he got an idea.

"Colonel Mustang, sir, I was wondering if you could help me with a problem," he said calmly, feeling somewhat relieved that he had at least gotten that out.

"Well, I don't know what I can do, but I'll try," Roy said, wondering what it could be that he could be of any help with.

Alphonse blushed slightly, thinking about how he should word his dilemma. Of course he didn't want to tell his brother's secret right out. That would be doing a severe injustice to all that his brother had been so careful to preserve. No, he would be meticulous in this undertaking, for it was a matter of great delicacy.

"I…have a friend…this friend likes someone, and I was just wondering what you do when you like someone? Do you tell, or do you keep it to yourself?" Al asked carefully, making sure to leave out any hints as to whom he was referring.

Roy quirked a curious eyebrow. Of all the people to come to, why him? Al had a few other people he could tell who might be better equipped to give advice. His brother would have been…well, maybe not. As far as Roy knew, Edward had little experience in the ways of romantic relationships. The only love affair the blond had ever had was with an alchemy book.

Still, it was puzzling, and he had to know for sure. "I'm flattered that you would come to me with this, Alphonse, but I have to ask: why not ask your brother about this? I'm sure he would be a much better person than I to help you."

A sure-fire lie if either of them had heard one, and they both knew it, but both let it slip as if it were nothing.

Al shook his head. "No, I…I can't tell Brother. He wouldn't understand," he said quietly. It was true; Edward wouldn't understand, because they had already had that discussion, and it had ended up far from where they'd started.

Roy watched the younger Elric go silent, looking at the floor like he was almost ashamed of something. But what could Alphonse possibly have to be ashamed about? As far as Roy knew, he had never done a dishonest thing in his entire life. He just couldn't see the young alchemist as the kind to have to be ashamed of anything at all, especially when it came to his brother. The only thing he had ever heard them fight over was that young friend of theirs, the mechanically-inclined one with the anger management problem.

Suddenly, it all made sense. No wonder Al wasn't saying anything to his brother. "This is about that Rockbell girl, isn't it? You like her, and so does Edward. That's why you aren't saying anything to him," Roy speculated.

Of course, part of him was almost pleading that this wasn't so, that there was something else bothering him. He didn't suppose that was right, though. It was the only thing that really made sense, even if it was slightly heartbreaking.

To his surprise, Al shook his head. "Oh no, Brother does not like Winry." He chuckled lightly. "I mean, they're friends, but other than that, they fight too much for anything like that to even remotely work out."

Roy ignored the fact that Alphonse himself hadn't denied that he liked Winry. He was too concerned with the fact that he was oddly relieved that Edward didn't like Winry like he had thought. The fact that he still had to help Al brought him out of his reverie.

"But this is about her, right? You like her?" he asked curiously. The thought that Al would like a girl wasn't inconceivable, but it was rather hard to fathom. However, now that the teen had more time on his hands, it wasn't too hard to grasp.

A surprised look crossed Alphonse's face. "No!" he shouted in a manner very unlike himself. As Roy looked at him, too stunned for words, he quickly recovered. "I mean…yes, but no…ugh." Al paused, flustered with all that he was trying to say—a rare occurrence indeed, since Al never usually said much to cause that to happen. "Yes, I like Winry. No, this isn't about me. It's about Edward."

_Edward?_ The fact that Alphonse had actually called his brother by _name_ and the serious tone in which he said it threw Roy off at first, but not too much that he hadn't realize that the topic of discussion was Edward and that Alphonse had come to him because Ed liked someone. This also brought to the forefront of his mind the question of why Alphonse would come to _him_ with this particular problem.

Instead of asking that, however, Roy simply used his talent of good self-control to appear as if he wasn't completely confused out of his gourd.

"Okay," he said slowly, still sorting out the haze that had formed in his mind, "so what can I do to help? Your answer is simple. If Edward likes someone, let him figure out what to do for himself. Your brother's a smart guy; he'll figure it out eventually."

"But that's just it," Al argued, "Brother is stubborn. He's been sitting on this for a long time, and knowing him, he'll probably sit on it for longer if I don't do something about it."

Feeling slight sympathy-pangs for the younger of the Elric duo, Roy frowned and did something he never thought he'd do: he gave actual advice, straight from his own point-of-view rather than that of what he "should" have told him. What a bad role model he was turning out to be.

"You know, maybe you should just go and put Edward in a situation he can't just 'sit on,' as you put it. It's like strategy. All you have to do is set him up and let everything else take its course," he said plainly.

Alphonse seemed to take all of this in, listening intently, before asking, "Sir, just how do I do that? Set him up, I mean. Brother is never going to fall for this. He's much smarter than that."

Roy smirked mischievously. Strategy just happened to be one of his strengths. Being clever enough to outwit Edward Elric was a task for any ordinary individual, but he'd done it so many times that, if tallied, could easily rival the number of girls he'd dated in his entire military career, and probably his life.

"Just do what any sensible soldier would do when following orders doesn't work out: go over his head," Roy said with a shrug, as if it were something simple.

To Al, it seemed like treason, but the more he thought about it, the more it made sense. He had to do something, or his brother would be in a self-created deadlock for a long time, possibly the rest of his life. As much as it made him feel guilty, he knew he was probably going to have to swallow the bitter pill of reality and do exactly what the colonel had suggested.

Roy found his curiosity grow as the younger male fell silent. He'd never really witnessed any kind of odd behavior from the older of the two…well, not any odder than usual, anyway. There was nothing he'd seen that ever suggested that Ed actually liked someone. Maybe he just hadn't been looking hard enough. Perhaps he'd missed something. He was usually one of the first to pick up on something like that. If he hadn't, then Hughes had. He felt a familiar pain hit his chest as he thought of his fallen best friend.

Yes, had Hughes been there, he would have noticed right away the very second Ed started acting suspicious. He always did. That was why he was in the Investigations department: he was just good at those kinds of things.

Well, he didn't have someone to keep him in the loop, so he'd just have to do things himself, the only way he knew how…he'd just ask. It'd worked pretty good for him in the past, so why not now?

"So, who is the unfortunate object of your brother's affection?" Roy asked teasingly.

Al swallowed hard. As nervous as he was about spilling his brother's beloved dirty little secret, he knew that it was now or never.

"Sir, it's…you."


	9. Personal Shots and Revelations

**A/N: Oh goodness me…twelve reviews for one chapter…I have been spurred into instantaneous updating again. I guess it really DOES work, after all. I need to develop a theory about how reviews faster update time. Anyway…**

**I obviously need to give some kudos, since they are in order. So, thank you to: jonnythehomocidalmaniac, xXX Bishiman Sephiroth XXx, Visual Confectionary (ily!), Roy Mustang 08, Dark Mage Makai, anmbcuconnfan, GreedxEd, hiya24, SpiraledSuicide, AirElemental101, mieko8804, and Sophie. Thank you so much for your reviews. They fuel my hopeless desire to one day create the ultimate RoyEd experience.**

**Oh, and Autumn dear…I only have one thing to say to you…**

**HIT EM WITH THE PIG!!!**

**Haha. Ily.**

**Disclaimer: I have nothing original to say. I am simply a sad little smutslut with a manipulative personality that causes me to take things that are not my own and use them for my own amusement. Forgive me. XD**

"_Sir, it's…you."_

Those three words seemed to echo through the air, reverberating off the walls and sitting very firmly before Roy in all their brutal honesty. It could not have been said any plainer, really. It was almost amazing how such a simple phrase could cause such a series of complicated thoughts.

As these words and their heavy truth hit home, Roy's heart uncharacteristically jumped into his throat. Everything that had been laid out before him was more than he'd ever dared to hope for. Even when stationed in the bitter North, all he dared to hope for was that the small, blond alchemist still lived.

Nay, he knew Edward had lived. He _had_ to. Even if it hadn't been true, he had to believe it as he did. Hope was too fragile a thing, too easily broken, and even the slightest doubt could have caused it to shatter. It was a wonder he'd ever even risked having any hope at all.

Still, a part of him had dared to hope for more, even as he stared into the blinding, bitter, white abyss of the polar North. Even in the most hopeless of situations, he had dared to carry a small flame (excuse the pun) of optimism that kept him going. Without it, he probably would have perished, for there had been no one to stop him this time, no Hughes to smack him back to reality or raise him up away from despair. Riza had tried, and he adored her for it, but there just wasn't anything appealing about that relationship. He was fond of her and viewed her as a close friend—nothing more, and nothing less.

He'd been trying to understand what it was that made his seemingly-charmed life seem so hollow before, but until Ed had gone missing, he never knew…never had any idea of how he'd really felt towards the younger alchemist. He'd always viewed him in the way one would their kid brother, but that wasn't how it really was. It had been so much more than that, and he should have known it before. It shouldn't have taken Edward disappearing for him to figure it out.

Of course, he'd never even dreamed of actually _acting_ on it, and not just because Ed had been nowhere to be found. Never once had he thought, "If and when Edward gets back, I'm going to tell him everything, from the very beginning."

No, that thought had never crossed his mind, because he, Roy Mustang, just didn't spill his guts whenever the opportunity came. It took a great deal of anger or desperation for him to elaborate on his emotions, and even when he did, it was usually under a great shield of false arrogance or indifference.

Then again, he'd never thought that Ed would reciprocate said sentiments, either. And just how long had this been going on, anyway? Had the little brat been sitting on this for days? Weeks? Months? The idea that the very stubborn Fullmetal had been this way for years wasn't that hard to fathom. In fact, it was very likely, considering that they hadn't been back in Amestris for that long.

_Now that you know, what are you going to do about it?_

Roy groaned internally. He couldn't remember when it had began, but his conscience had suddenly taken on the voice of Hughes, always the voice of reason in the back of his mind. It was almost comforting, to feel like his best friend was still looking after him, even though it was only that odd moral sense that had been instilled in him after years of the man's influence.

Roy let out an audible sigh, propping his chin in a gloved palm. What was he going to do indeed…

"Sir? Colonel Mustang, sir… Maybe I shouldn't have said anything. I think he might have gone into shock," Al said, looking at Roy with concern.

"Hmm? Oh, sorry. Just got distracted by my own thoughts. Well, uh…," he cleared his throat, "I…uh…"

Never one to need telling, Alphonse nodded. "Yes, I do think it's getting a little late. Brother will probably be wondering where I've gone off to. Thank you for your time." He bowed slightly before letting a small smile slip and turning to leave. "I'll be sure to tell Ed to be ready to report in a couple days. See you." He walked out the door, leaving as quietly as he had come.

It was amazing, really, just how different the two boys were, Roy mused, but there was something different about the way they all interacted now. Yes, the dynamic of their small group had changed radically, and it was up to him to figure out just where his feelings fit.

If they even fit anywhere at all…

That was something to be figured out on the fly, Roy determined. All he had to do was go see Ed, and the first thing that he felt, he would go with it. There was nothing more to it than that.

_You sure that's wise?_

Roy sighed again, this time laying his head on his desk, his arms serving as a pillow as he let his thoughts roll around inside his head.

"God, Maes…what I would give for some advice right now…," he murmured, feeling the weight of the long-strained issue finally take its toll on him.

"Well, if you don't mind the source of the information, sir, I'd be more than happy to oblige," Riza said quietly, causing Roy's head to snap up in her direction. He had been so wrapped up in his own thoughts, he hadn't even heard her come in.

"Uh…well, I…," Roy said slowly, once again at a loss for words. He sighed and smiled. Riza was his friend and loyal subordinate, so anything he said to her would be kept in the strictest of confidence. Sure, she probably wouldn't like what she heard and he'd probably get an earful, but at this point, he was almost out of options. "Sure."

She smiled at him—a real, genuine smile that she saved for a spare few. "All right. What seems to be the problem?" she asked.

"There's this…friend of mine. He came to me with a problem and I didn't know what to tell him," Roy said in honest. That was, after all, what had transpired. There was no reason to lie about that much.

Riza's expression turned to one of deep thought as she leaned against the back of a nearby chair. "All right, what was the problem about?"

"It was about…relationships. He was asking about what to do if you like someone," Roy said forwardly. Once again, no reason to lie…just yet.

The blond-haired woman nodded in understanding, though she looked a little surprised. "Not to be offensive, sir, but of all the people to talk to about relationships, I'm not sure you would be the one I'd go to, personally."

The man was stunned. Although that's what he'd been thinking the whole time Alphonse had been standing before him trying to tell him the thing that would ultimately wind up altering his future (and of course, that was probably what had taken him so long to say it—a good reason if the colonel had ever heard one), he was still a little taken aback that anyone would suggest that he would _not_ be the one to turn to, either. Sure, he'd probably be second choice, perhaps third, but _last?_ He was the Flame Alchemist, for crying out loud! He'd had more than his fair share of romantic conquests (or more than _anyone's_ fair share, as Havoc liked to frequently remind him) and the least he could do was give a little simple advice.

Riza shook her head, knowing Roy and his predictable male-ego thought pattern all-too well.

"That's not what I meant. I was just saying that sure, maybe you'd be good for date advice, picking up women perhaps, but not _relationship_ advice. That's pushing it, even for you."

Okay, that was the straw that broke the Ishbalan's back. There was no way in Hell anyone was going to accuse him, Roy Mustang, of being inferior in any aspect when it came to the game of love. Sure, he'd never had an actual relationship, nor had he ever actually been in love himself, but damnit, he'd dated more women than most of the men in Central! If women were merits in the military, he would have been Fuhrer at age twenty!

"Oh sir, quit sulking. I wasn't taking a personal shot at you," Riza said with a smirk, knowing that of all people, Roy would be the one to catch the joke. He was, after all, usually the one at the wrong end of the barrel most days, and it was getting to be such a joke that it was to the point where he swore if she ever actually _fired_ at him, he'd die whether she missed or not. The heart attack alone would be enough to kill him.

Roy offered a small smile, but little more than that. He was still troubled by what lay ahead of him. He had to do something about it, one way or the other. There was no ignoring this little piece of information. Yes, he would follow this up like he would any other lead, investigating it thoroughly.

As he sat there, musing over his options, Riza let out a heavy sigh. Men could be so stupid at times. As much as it pained her to have to aid him in something she didn't approve of, it pained her more to watch her precious colonel, the man she'd loved for so long, suffer out of ignorance.

"Talk to him, Roy. That's the least you can do," she said flatly, causing Roy's head to snap up.

"You…hmm. Right," Roy said simply. Of course Riza knew. Riza always knew everything, many times before anyone else.

Yes, he would talk to Ed, get things straightened out. The worst thing that could happen is for the blonde to freak out, but it wasn't like that didn't happen on a regular basis, anyway.

Roy smirked. This was going to be kinda fun.


	10. Much Ado About Edo

**A/N: OMGYAY! You have all been sooooo fabulous with your reviews! I am totally inspired to write like a madman until I get this thing finished. Of course, this isn't my best work, nor is it my strongest chapter, but I am hoping it is to your liking.**

**Total kudos to: xXX Bishiman Sephiroth XXx, mieko8804, Dark Mage Makai, Sadler, yutakayumi, jonnythehomocidalmaniac, anmbcuconnfan, Nuitari Aquarius, Kirbychan, hiya24, AirElemental101, Sophie, and the always adoring Visual Confectionary, without whom my writing would not be nearly as humorous, for she keeps me on my toes. Ily doll.**

**DISCLAIMER: I had to make it bold just to point out the obvious. If FMA or any of the related characters were mine, I certainly wouldn't be in college. I also wouldn't have stopped the series. Too bad it isn't mine, eh? I'd gladly share. Hey, maybe we should all pool our lunch money and buy it! XD**

Ed sat at a table in room he'd reserved at the library for the evening, pouring over an assortment of alchemy books with a newfound zeal. All the time he'd spent in Germany had been used studying rocketry and other sciences more applicable to that side of the Gate, and he'd found he missed the old science. Plus, there were several laws in this science called "physics" that he'd realize could be applied to alchemy as well. He remembered Alfons saying something about a man named Newton and his theories. One law in particular was that of the law of conservation of mass, which stated that the mass of a closed system of substances will remain constant, regardless of the processes acting inside the system. Basically, it was saying that while matter can change form, it could be neither created nor destroyed. It sounded a lot like equivalent exchange to him, only it was far more specific, leaving no room for loop holes like the law he'd once considered the end-all philosophy to life. He'd also learned a lot about input and output effort, work, and equations concerning them in which, using certain devices, one could actually get out more than they put in.

Those theories, though slightly different in nature, helped Edward understand many things in alchemy that had went unanswered…things he'd had to learn the hard way.

He grit his teeth and slammed the book shut, causing a loud sound to echo in the small space. It enraged him that he and Al had had to go through all that they did in order to learn what he'd managed to learn in the span of a week. Based on the laws of equivalent exchange…

"We got screwed over," he muttered bitterly.

"I certainly hope not," came a voice from the doorway—a voice Ed automatically recognized, causing his heart to jump into his throat. Without actually turning his head, Ed glanced over to see the distinctive smirk that could only belong to one very amused Roy Mustang.

The blonde rolled his eyes and grabbed another book, trying to ignore the pounding of blood in his ears. He could almost feel the air molecules around him shift as the dark-haired man walked up to the table, pulled a chair out, and sat across from him. He had never been so glad for long bangs in his life. They covered the blush that was beginning to stain his cheeks. He could feel the older man's dark eyes on him, causing him to squirm uncomfortably.

Edward swallowed hard, but didn't take his eyes off of his book. As they sat there in a kind of silent stalemate, he felt the familiar irritation creep up on him until he couldn't take anymore. He had to 1) break the silence, because it was driving him mad, and 2) find out just what the smug bastard wanted from him. Whatever it was, he wasn't doing it, no matter how much part of him desperately wanted him to bend to the man's every whim.

"Are you here for something specific, or are you just here to irritate me?" he asked casually, his voice not betraying his inner struggle.

Roy smirked at the amusing choice of words and the tone that had accompanied them. The smaller male certainly had changed. The old Ed would have been shouting and cursing as soon as he'd hit the door. This new and unfamiliar Ed seemed less rash, less quick to attack.

He shrugged nonchalantly, not caring that his actions were questionable, even to himself. "I'm just working on a lead, that's all."

Ed quirked an eyebrow, allowing himself to glance over the top of his book. Whenever the colonel actually left his office to work on something himself, it was usually very important. But…if he was busy working on a lead, then why was he wasting time bothering Ed?

He smiled out of the corner of his mouth at the older man's predictable behavior. "Looks like you're just slacking off to me. But what's new, right?"

Roy laughed low in his throat, causing a chill to shoot up Edward's spine. "I can assure you, Fullmetal, that I am working and that I do intend to see this through until I know the truth."

"The truth?" Ed muttered, setting his book down to fully examine the man in front of him. A thousand things ran through his mind about what that statement could mean. The truth about what? And what did it have to do with him? If he was involved, it could mean anything. Did Roy want to know about the stone? The Gate? The other side? He couldn't imagine what it could be, since he'd been nothing but honest with Roy since before he'd even been sent to the other side the first time. He didn't have to report for another couple of days, so what was so important that it couldn't wait until then?

Roy nodded his dark head in confirmation. "Yes, the truth, Elric. The complete and unfiltered truth."

The blonde simply looked at him in confusion, replaying everything that had happened since he and Al had returned home. He shook his head. There was nothing he could think of! He'd been honest about everything—a rare thing for him indeed. He had no secrets. The only thing he had even been _remotely_ dishonest about…

"_Come to think of it…"_

"Oh no," Ed said aloud unintentionally. He stared at the book in front of him, focusing on the words as if they were some kind of code he couldn't seem to decipher. The last thing he wanted to do was look up at the uniformed individual before him. The only possible thing he could be talking about had to have something to do with what he'd said days before.

How could he have been so stupid to think he could hide it? If it was something Al could see, even being his brother and all, how could he have assumed that an observant man like Mustang couldn't see it?

He swallowed nervously. There was only one thing he could do; one thing he'd learned in all of the years he'd been getting into scrapes…

Deny. Deny. Deny. Deny everything until you believe it yourself.

He glanced up at Roy, who was watching him with an amused expression on his face, as if he knew everything the younger male was thinking. He shifted awkwardly, feeling the heat of the other man's scrutinizing gaze.

Roy quirked an eyebrow, smirking at the blonde as a blush slowly crept across his suddenly-youthful looking face. He leaned forward, resting his chin in his hand and watched Ed thoughtfully.

Ed could feel the heat rising to his face. _Damn damn damn!_ All he wanted to do was jump to his feet and run out of the room, away from the man staring at him intently with his dark eyes and taunting smile.

And he would have, if he wasn't rooted to his seat by his anxiety. Plus, he was undeniably turned-on, despite the fact that he was terrified. In fact, the rush of adrenaline probably made it ten times worse. He wanted to slap himself. He'd faced armed terrorists, more than a few angry mobs of villagers, entire armies, homunculi, and other skilled alchemists with the certainty that he could be killed at any moment. He'd done it without fear—at least, not for himself—but there was something about the seemingly unthreatening situation that had his heart ramming against his ribs.

For a moment, the young prodigy didn't think there was anything he wouldn't give to have Envy come along and stab him, or break his neck, or eat him—_anything_ to get him out of the spot he was in.

He was pulled away from the brain-freezing, incapacitating anxiety he felt by the look of genuine concern on the colonel's face.

"Are you feeling all right, Edward?" he asked, his brow furrowing, making deep creases in his pale forehead. "You look like you're about to pass out."

Yes! A way to get away from the discomfort at last! If there was a God, Ed was certain he was somehow being blessed. He nodded his head mutely, feeling relief wash over him.

"Yeah, I suddenly don't feel so well, probably from reading too long. I should go lie down or something," he said quickly, rising from his seat and grabbing his beige jacket from the back of his chair. Suddenly, he felt his head drop out through his stomach as an overwhelming feeling of dizziness came over him, causing him to stagger slightly.

"Oh…vertigo…ugh," he managed, falling forward. He was certain that he was going to hit the ground, but he never felt it come. Instead, he felt himself being held up by two strong arms. He opened his eyes as soon as it felt like the room had stopped spinning and found himself looking up into the very serious expression of his superior officer.

"This happen often?" he asked softly as he began to help Ed back to his feet.

The motion brought sudden nausea to the young alchemist, causing him to reach up to pause his support.

"Whoa, I don't…think that's such a good idea, not just yet," he said quietly, feeling embarrassed at appearing so weak in front of Roy.

Roy smirked, shifting slightly to get a better hold of the smaller male. "I can't exactly stay here holding you all day," he said, a note of amusement in his voice.

Edward cast his eyes to the ground. "I wish," he muttered, not intending for Roy to hear.

However, his words were heard, and Roy let slip a small smile, which he allowed to remain there, despite his better judgment. Still holding the metal-limbed alchemist, he tightened his grip on the blonde and loosened the grip on his pride.

Ed turned slightly to look back up at Roy, unsure if maybe he'd accidentally been heard. He was met by a compassionate gaze and a soft smile. It kinda freaked him out.

He was again startled by the sudden movement created when the older man slowly sat down, cradling Ed's head in his lap. Ed looked up into dark eyes that were staring back at him, as if entranced by something. He almost shivered as gloved hands began to smooth his hair, something anyone rarely did…mostly because Ed rarely let anyone do that.

No one really knew, save for Al and perhaps Winry, but Ed was very particular about his hair. It was his vain point, really…except for his height, which was more of an insecurity issue than anything. More than once, Al had shook his head pitifully at his older sibling's love for his hair, muttering something about "compensation" and walking away.

As Roy sat there, smoothing back several golden flyaway hairs, it took every ounce of Ed's self-control not to close his eyes and snuggle closer. It was even more difficult for him to try and form words without stuttering, rendering him uncharacteristically speechless. Finally, knowing that he couldn't sit there forever (damn), he decided to attempt some form of comprehendible speech.

"M-mustang…?" he asked shakily, feeling heat flood his face at the sound of his own quivering voice. "What…what are you doing?"

Roy smirked again, causing Ed's face to redden further. "Well, I can't just walk off and leave you to your own devices. You'd probably make yourself worse. You're no good to me if you're not in top form, you know." He shrugged indifferently. "You can't really expect me to just stand there. My legs were getting tired. You're heavier than you look."

Edward nodded sheepishly. "Yeah…" Normally, he would have made a smart remark about automail not being _that_ heavy, followed by an even smarter remark about Roy getting to be an old man, but he didn't want to say anything that would make him seem ungrateful or that would make Roy leave. He really didn't want Roy to leave…ever. The thought of him and Roy just sitting in the library study room for the rest of their lives seemed absurd, but he wasn't really into things that made sense at the moment. After all, what made sense about the position they were in? Not much, as far as Ed could see.

He wasn't about to question it, though. He was enjoying the attention far too much. Sure, he'd gotten attention before, but nothing like this. He found that he was fond of it, perhaps more so than he should have been. Suddenly, he noticed something he hadn't before.

"Hey," he said softly, his voice hinting at curiosity more than anything, "what happened to your patch?"

Roy's hand stilled, and immediately Edward felt a sense of something he'd only felt once before towards his commanding officer: guilt.

_Thy mouth runneth over, Edward,_ Alfons Heiderich's voice sounded in his head. It seemed like he'd said that often, whenever Ed had said too much.

"Sorry. That was rude," Ed said, looking over at the nearby wall.

Much to Ed's surprise, Roy actually responded, though his voice was so low that his response almost went unheard.

"My eye was reconstructed in a way…the tissue was still alive, still present, and once it finally healed all the way…"

"Alchemy," Edward finished, understanding completely. Alchemy had been used to reconstruct Roy's eye so that it functioned properly. And why not? It wasn't as if Roy was any use to the military with just one eye. The thought that anyone would think of Roy as remotely useless put a bitter taste in Ed's mouth.

"Apparently," Roy confirmed, as if reading Ed's thoughts. His tone indicated that he didn't quite understand the entire thing himself. "I must admit that I wasn't even awake for it. I had originally gone in to get my eye examined, to check for further infection, and the doctors took it upon themselves to fix it while I was unconscious." He smiled sadly, giving his face an eerily serene look. "Probably more than I deserve, right?"

The younger alchemist could only lie there, stunned by the other man's sudden openness. This was a side to Roy he'd only _imagined_ existed. Ed was oddly compelled to comfort him somehow. It suddenly occurred to Ed what he should say—a rare occurrence if there ever was one. After all, it wasn't every day that Edward Elric's thought pattern _preceded_ his speech.

Ed shook his head in disagreement. "I don't think so. You deserve about as much as anyone else, really."

Roy glanced down at Edward and smiled. It was probably the most genuine smile Ed had ever seen cross the Flame Alchemist's face…or _anyone's_ face, for that matter. It seemed so out of character for the usually stoic/arrogant alchemist, yet Ed found that he preferred it. It made Roy look more pleasant, instead of a smug bastard.

He could feel the taller man's eyes on him, which made him blush again. He couldn't remember a time when he'd blushed so much. It was somewhat unnerving.

"Thank you," Roy said softly, causing surprised golden irises to snap to full attention.

Roy was…_thanking_ him? He couldn't believe what he was hearing. Even in his most unbelievable, outrageous, extreme fantasies, it didn't seem plausible. Even in his dreams, the older man was an arrogant, overbearing, pretentious bastard.

_Yeah, but you're infatuated with that arrogant, overbearing, pretentious bastard,_ Al's voice sounded in his subconscious.

He groaned internally. Things were bad enough without the Als giving him grief. There really was no difference between his little brother and his parallel "otherworld" being. Both seemed to be in the back of his mind, waiting to scold him. As sad as it sort of made him to think of his deceased friend, Ed's attention was quickly drawn back by a pair of intense, yet strangely softened eyes staring at him. He felt his face heat up once again and bit back a swear at his embarrassment.

"Y-you're welcome," he stammered, still vaguely aware that he was being watched. He cleared his throat. "I, uh…I'm good to stand now, I think."

Roy's brow furrowed, a look of concern crossing his face. "You certain? Your face is pretty red. Maybe you should go to the infirmary."

Ed could feel his face heating more by the second and had to use every fiber of his being not to cover his face like some pathetic schoolgirl with a crush. "N-nah. I'm fine. It's just really ho…warm in here. I think I'll go outside and get some air." He made to stand, only to find himself being helped to his feet.

"Are you sure? Your face really is redder than usual," Roy said, sounding more like Ed's mother than his commanding officer. "It's almost like you're—" He paused, a knowing smirk curving along his lips.

Ed winced. Any moment now, something would come…some kind of sly taunting that always accompanied that all-too familiar expression.

"Why, Fullmetal, you're blushing."

And there it was. Edward paused before responding, shooting him an "you have _got_ to be kidding" look. His eyes narrowed as he glared at the taller man.

"Am not," he muttered irritably. He moved to gather his books, not wanting to stay in the man's presence any longer, lest he let something else slip unintentionally. After his mistake with Al before, he wasn't about to let his mouth run away with him again.

He was so preoccupied with the gathering of his belongings that he didn't hear Roy come up behind him, nor did he see the colonel place his hands down on each side of the table beside Ed, effectively trapping him…

**A/N 2: Just as an added note, PLEASE DON'T KILL ME! I know, third cliff-type ending in a row, and I SWEAR I won't do it again! At least not in the next chapter! Please keep the love coming…though I probably don't deserve it after that little "…" stint… T.T**


	11. There Are Worse Things Than A Stiff Neck

**A/N: 19 Reviews?! 19?! That is amazing! I am absolutely ecstatic over the entire ordeal, so much so that I decided to post what I have instead of taking another three days to try and lengthen it. Yes, this shall be short, and if that last chapter didn't make me a total bh, this one will, but I'm hoping I can finish what I was working on and spit it out ASAP.**

**Soooo thanks go to the nineteen WONDERFUL individuals who know how to click the little "go" button at the bottom of the page. Congrats, kids, you have just proven that you have skills beyond that of a trained monkey: mieko8804, Dark Mage Makai, jonnythehomocidalmaniac, yutakayumi, xXX Bishiman Sephiroth XXx, Visual Confectionary, AirElemental101, Sadler, GreedxEd, Nuitari Aquarius, Sophie, saraHubert, Krystal TM, hiya24, Kirbychan, Mus4u, AstroStarr42, Koigokoro-Love, and Satan in a Pretty Costume. You all rock the box.**

**Oh, and if you could (I know, asking for ANOTHER favor on top of wonderful reviews is a lot), would you all go hop over to the ever-lovely Visual Confectionary's brilliant masterpiece "Housing Project Elric"? It's funny as all get-out. She doesn't get NEARLY enough credit for the things she thinks up.**

**Enough of my ramblings. Again, please forgive the shortness and repetitive abrupt stop. Mind you, this wasn't going to be the entire chapter, but I wanted to put SOMETHING out for your enjoyment. I'm thinking of you all, really.**

_He was so preoccupied with the gathering of his belongings that he didn't hear Roy come up behind him, nor did he see the colonel place his hands down on each side of the table beside Ed, effectively trapping him…_

"S'been great catching up with you, Colonel, but I really need to get going," Edward said quickly, gathering his things. He turned around to leave, only to be met by a very solid human barricade.

"What the…" He glanced up at Roy, feeling a mix of confusion and anxiety at being in such close proximity to the man he'd been secretly enamored with for the past eight-ish years (though he had fought it for the first four). Ever since the then-Lt. Colonel Mustang had shown up at Pinako's Edward had been fascinated with him. It hadn't helped matters that the man had come in search of the then-eleven year-old boy.

As much as he hated to admit it, Ed had been impressed with the military at first. Part of him had been in awe at the way everything was carried out effectively at Central. In the midst of smoothly flowing trails of people, papers, orders, and information sat the core of chaos in a lt. colonel's office, and at the center of that mess of mockery sat a man immaculate in appearance, a man of high stature, and the man who was firmly blocking Edward's path.

"H-hey, you mind moving?" Ed stammered, willing the other man to move with his voice, as he didn't really want to physically move towards Roy at all. It really wasn't as if he had any room to move, anyway. Still, he was afraid to really touch the colonel, sure he would pass out if he did. That thought made Ed feel like a stupid schoolgirl with a crush again, and he would have slapped himself, if not for said man in front of him.

Roy cocked an eyebrow in amusement at the young man's antics. Even though Ed wasn't really doing much, the older man could tell exactly what he was thinking. Whether that was from knowing him for so long, or knowing what it was to act like that in general, Roy didn't know. All he knew was that the fact that Ed seemed anxious at the close proximity of their bodies was a good indication that what Alphonse had told him was indeed true. Though he couldn't determine the extent of the supposed emotions, there was definitely something there. It was almost laughable, how he'd managed to miss all of the obvious signs before.

Then again, Ed wasn't like the others. Anyone else who'd had an attraction to Roy…well, they made it pretty clear. Roy almost laughed aloud. The thought that the Fullmetal Alchemist should be compared to hordes of giggling, flush-faced females was more than humorous, it was hilarious. Though Ed's reactions to Roy were different, that didn't excuse his obliviousness. Maybe he'd just been so busy thinking about his own feelings that he hadn't really been aware that such feelings could be reciprocated.

This fact, of course, had not yet occurred to Ed either, as he stood there, unable to move. All he could think of was how the object of his long-hidden affection was right in front of him, so close that moving a few mere _centimeters_ would cause him to touch the other man. A dozen thoughts swam through his head as he desperately tried to think of an escape route. His heart jumped into his throat when Roy suddenly leaned over so that Ed could feel hot breath on his ear.

"Leaving so soon? We still have so much to catch up on," Roy said softly, causing a chill to shoot up Edward's spine.

The smaller male held back a groan. God, Roy was going to kill him. He could feel the warmth of the dark-haired man's body radiating off in waves (though he couldn't really distinguish whose heat it really was, since he was feeling rather warm himself). Roy was close enough to touch without really touching him and he smelled of a strange combination of soap and gunpowder. It really did fit him, Ed thought, and if he had the choice, he'd definitely make a cologne out of it, just for himself so he could whip it out whenever he needed to.

And oh, how he _needed_ to. He could feel that need slowly manifesting in physical form between his legs and it was starting to make him crazy. He desperately needed to escape.

"I…really have to com—_go_…leave. Please," Ed said, forcing the last syllable out. He would never have begged for anything from the bastard, but he really was suffering. He'd rather have certain parts of his anatomy cut _off_ than deal with what he was.

Roy raised a curious eyebrow once again. Never before could he really recall Edward having said the word "please" for anything. Not in all the years _he'd_ known the kid, anyway.

_He's not a kid anymore, Roy. He's a grown man, damn near, and you have to respect that,_ Hughes echoed in Roy's mind.

Roy sighed. He knew that was probably true. He was about to comply and move aside when he noticed a certain…"protrusion" in the blonde's lower extremities.

Oh yes, Edward was a grown man now, in more ways than one.

Suddenly, Roy wasn't so inclined to respect the young man's wishes. No, he would respect him in a totally different way—a way that would benefit the both of them if all went well.

"Well, what do we have here?" Roy inquired, smirking at the blush that was quickly flushing across the blonde's face. "I don't mean to _pry_, but I do believe you are _poking_ me in the thigh."

_Damnit, what do I do now?!_ Ed screamed in his mind. He was aroused, nay, _stiff_ as a board and had nowhere to go. Stupid, smug Mustang had not only _noticed_ Ed's source of discomfort, he had pointed it out! Like it was nothing to him at all!

Wait. Roy had said something about Ed's…uh-huh, and he hadn't seemed grossed out or anything by it at all! In fact, he seemed almost…_pleased…_

"Uh…sorry," Ed choked, trying to move backwards into the table. He hoped to move it just enough to give him an out, but instead he tripped, causing him to fall into the almost-expectant arms of his superior officer yet _again._

"You sure are clumsy today, Fullmetal," Roy mused, lifting him onto the table and straightening his shirt out. "If you don't start being more careful, you're going to knock yourself or someone else out with that thing."

_WHAT did he just say?!_ Edward's mind screeched yet again. He was confused. Was Roy just being glib? Was he teasing? For the love of all that was good and reasonable, what was going on?

Noticing the younger male's obvious confusion, Roy smiled softly and reached over to brush a few strands of stray blonde hair from his face. He could only imagine what was going through his mind right now. It probably didn't differ too much from what had been going through his own mind when Alphonse had let out his brother's little secret.

In fact, had Edward come onto him all by himself, Roy probably would have had nothing short of a stroke and died. Albeit, he would have died happily once he'd gotten an idea of what had happened. Part of him just wanted to reach out and hold the blonde, if only to make sure he was actually there, and that his own sick mind hadn't decided to play a month-long trick on him.

Unbeknownst to him, that was exactly what he was doing, leaving Edward to wonder further just what had happened to his world and how he was going to deal with the sudden change in his once-rival's behavior.

"Uh…M-Mustang? Hey, Bastard…Roy?"


	12. The Cost of Progress

**A/N: So sorry for taking so long!!! Jury duty has been murder. (Not literally, mind you…) But I finally got down to getting some writing done. Now, it's not the greatest, but…it's close! Just kidding. I did try to throw in a little somethin-somethin for those of you who are sooooo patient with me. It's not THE thing, but it's coming close. Next chapter is already in motion, and it is a good one. I just thought it would be a good place to stop at the end of this one. More effective, less of a cliff-hanger…you know. Ah well, I talk too much.**

**Much thanks: Visual Confectionary (ily-quit molesting my muse, damnit…), Crimson lantern, mieko8804, anmbcuconnfan, Sadler, jonnythehomocidalmaniac, xXX Bishiman Sephiroth XXx, Mus4u, GreedxEd, Nuitari Aquarius, saraHubert, Kirbychan, lady scorpio, DesperateMeasures, Dark Mage Makai, Amy cathaine, AstroStarr 42, Chetra-card, gundanium, Glue Project, and TaintedShikonShards.**

**I really thank those of you whom I keep seeing come back time and time again and don't even have to look twice at your name to remember to thank you. Believe it or not, I actually look for a couple of names each time and I love seeing old familiar ones just as much as new ones. So thank you.**

**(insert obvious-yet-clever disclaimer here)**

Edward was confused as to whether he was in Hell or Heaven. Neither was likely, since his atheist views denied either such place, but still, with his commanding officer firmly wrapped around his ribcage, he wasn't about to rule anything out. Weirder things _had_ happened, after all, though none came to his mind at the moment.

He called out, trying to get the older man's attention, but part of him didn't know if he actually _wanted_ Roy to respond. He hadn't been held like this in so long…it was a nice change of pace. Usually, people were either trying to use him, pin something on him, or kill him. It was a curse, being so talented at such a young age, and more often than not, Edward had desperately longed for someone who could see past his talent to what he really was, as a person. Sure, he had Al…but it just wasn't the same. Al wouldn't ever hold him like that, and he wasn't entirely sure he wanted him to. Yes, he loved his baby brother, but there were certain limitations to said affection.

He felt the back of his throat tighten, but he would not let himself cry. No, not in front of this man, no matter how unusual his behavior was. He just couldn't. Roy would never let him hear the end of it.

Then again, with the way he was acting…why _was_ he like that, anyway? First, he was pointing out Ed's little…_problem_, and now he was _hugging_ him? What was going on? Roy couldn't be drunk, though that would've been the blonde's first guess. He didn't smell any alcohol on the older man anywhere, so that ruled that out. His only other guess was that Roy must've hit his head _really_ hard.

Yes, that had to be it. The dumbass had gone and smacked his gourd, and now he was somehow transformed into a hugging…hugger! It was pleasing, but it was also very disturbing. It wasn't like the usually-stoic man to make any real bodily contact with anyone…not full body contact, anyway, and he was nothing short of practically _lying_ on Ed. Then again, if Roy _did_ start lying on him…

_Nonononono!!! Can't think like that! No thoughts like that! None, you got it! No…Wait a minute, what is this…AHHH! It's getting bigger! It can't get BIGGER! That's physically impossible!_

Yet, impossible it was not. Ed's erection was actually _growing_, much to his displeasure. Well, not his displeasure, per say, but it was rather uncomfortable; with Roy being so close to him and all, the not-so-little guy just had nowhere to go.

As Roy grasped onto the very-real blonde in front of him, he couldn't help but notice that he was practically being _stabbed_ in the hip. He pulled back slowly, not being able to resist glancing down at the now-completely hardened, seemingly anatomically-incorrect erection the young man before him was sporting. It took every ounce of restraint he had not to pull the blonde's now snug-fitting pants down and poke at it, just to make sure he wasn't imagining things.

Ed could feel his cheeks flaring as he watched Roy examine him like some kind of science experiment. He wasn't something to be put under a microscope and analyzed, damnit! He was sitting there, very uncomfortable, and the bastard wasn't making him feel any better by _staring!_

Roy glanced up after realizing that he was staring awkwardly at the blonde's lower regions to find that said blonde was glaring at him. If he hadn't had years of military experience (and if he hadn't been so used to Ed glaring at him like that), he might have actually blushed. However, he had more control than that and was able to keep himself from even flinching…with his _head_, anyway…

His _other_ "head" had other ideas, entirely. He was never one to follow orders, but it was becoming very clear to him exactly who was boss. He would have been embarrassed, except for the fact that Ed was too busy being irritated with him to notice.

"You got a staring problem, bastard?" Ed growled, narrowing his eyes ever-so-slightly at the older man, who was struggling not to laugh, or show any kind of reaction at all.

If his attempts at getting dates were anything like his attempts at trying to keep his erection from being…well, erect, his love life would have been more pitiful than that of the dateless wonder himself, Jean Havoc. That thought was almost a mood-killer in and of itself. However, that was automatically changed when he suddenly felt his collar being jerked forward as Ed turned the tables on him…literally.

Edward threw Roy against the table, causing him to fall onto it, his back hitting the polished oak surface hard. He struggled as the blonde practically _climbed_ on top of him, straddling his waist and grabbing a fistful of starched collar again.

"How do you like that? Not so great being kept against your will, is it?" Ed hissed, his face just inches away from that of the colonel's. "If I hadn't promised Al I'd try harder to make peace, I would have beat your face in so many times…"

His words caught in his throat as he suddenly realized that Roy wasn't exactly being held _against_ his will at all. In fact, his "will" was pushing very firmly against his hip. He instantly became aware of just how close his face was to the other man's as he could almost feel their breaths mingle in the subtle cold of the reserved study area.

Finally, Roy gathered the courage to break the fragile, yet heavy silence that had fallen between them, for fear someone might come in to perhaps check on the young alchemist or come looking for him, since he had been gone for quite some time. His way of doing so wasn't exactly the best of observations, but it was the only thing he could manage to think of.

"Funny, I never noticed before…you have freckles," he muttered plainly, much to the shock and surprise of one Fullmetal Alchemist.

Oh, Ed was going to try and cover his tracks. He was going to utter a slight "che" and promptly leave the room; a simple cluck of the tongue and he would have been out of there.

However, it's quite difficult to cluck your tongue when you are currently shoving it down someone's throat.

He didn't know when he had started kissing Roy. He had no clue what had possessed him to do so. All Ed knew was that someone finally noticed something else about him (as trivial as it was), and a feeling had overwhelmed him that suddenly made him feel not-so insignificant.

Roy had seen it coming. He was going to stop him, or at least turn his head. He was going to try and push the blonde back, try to explain to him the weight of the situation…but it just wasn't there. His brain had been completely wiped clean of all thoughts of resistance, and all he could think of were the warm lips that were currently pressed against his and the tongue sliding against his in a surprisingly gentle fashion.

One would think that two personalities like Edward Elric and Roy Mustang would have been trying to tear each other's throats out, kissing like they fought, with the same ferocious nature, but that just wasn't so. In fact, no one would have suspected them of kissing in the first place…at least, not one another.

But they were. Ed had made the first move in something other than a fight or some kind of mischievous scheme in his life, and Roy was the receiving beneficiary of that abrupt boldness.

A strange boldness had emerged in Roy as well, for instead of being the responsible adult in the situation and pushing the blonde away, he was pulling him closer, holding onto him like he couldn't ever let go. It was almost as if he was afraid the blonde would disappear out of his life again. He wasn't sure he could handle that. Sure, he'd been fine before, but that was before he'd known what his lips felt like…what it was like to have his fingers through surprisingly soft strands of hair the color of sunshine…no, he wouldn't let that slip through his fingers as easily as that hair ever again. Not even if it cost him his reputation. Not even if it cost him his career.

Not even if it cost him his life.


	13. Misinterpretations Can Be Misleading

**A/N: I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry!!! This took me longer than expected. I was on a roll, but then I got interrupted…grrr…but all is well now. I think. I hope. No massive cliff-hangers here. Nope.**

**Thanks a thousand: AstroStarr42, Visual Confectionary (ilyily), Sadler, mieko8804, jonnythehomocidalmaniac, yutakayumi, AirElemental101, GreedxEd, Chetra-card, anmbcuconnfan, Nuitari Aquarius, Amy cathaine, Dark Mage Makai, Kirbychan, Glue Project, kiryanna, Crimson lantern, Jam280, zst4ever, msberry, YaoiPrincess, HFA and Kisa, Shine Lumiere, catwwomen47, KeveTenjoin, and Sophie.**

**Twenty-six reviews is lovely. I absolutely love all of you for this, and as an awesome offer this chapter, with your comment, please leave the name of a story of yours you'd like me to read and review. I'll have much free time this week, so I really need something to do!**

Edward felt embodied by some force that wasn't letting him go. Something other than the man holding him fast was keeping him there. Whether it was sudden fear or apprehension, or possibly even an unwillingness to accept that what seemed like the most perfect thing in the world to him was little more than nothingness, he didn't know. He just wanted to be there, in Roy's arms, pretending that the rest of the world didn't exist, if only for now.

He didn't want it to end. He wasn't ready to move away from the warm body tugged to his, nor the warm lips that were slowly passing over his in a oddly relaxed way. He'd always associated Roy Mustang with all things quick-paced and frantic. But no, the man's kiss was a complete contradiction to his character. No one had the right to kiss like that, as if they had all the time in the world…as if the world wasn't just outside that door, and the second they both stepped out of the room, they would have to realize the weight of what they were doing.

Unfortunately, he found that the saying that "all good things must come to an end" was all-too true, as Roy began to pull away slowly, in such a languid way that he almost looked drugged.

Ed snorted. The idea of the great Flame Alchemist taking any kind of drug paraphernalia was oddly amusing. He had a strong feeling that the man resisted taking aspirin if he could help it.

"Something funny, Fullmetal?" Roy asked, quirking an eyebrow curiously. Though his face showed slight signs of irritation, his dark eyes seemed to dance. Always the rationalist, Ed figured it to be a trick of the light, but his inner idealistic dreamer let him believe deep down that his eyes really were dancing. It was oddly comforting to think that maybe there was a side to the usually aloof alchemist only he was allowed to see.

Still, he felt somewhat exposed, having made an advance upon not only a man, but a much older man who just so happened to be his superior officer. He could practically feel himself retracting back into his shell.

"Well?" Roy asked again, his face calm but his voice containing a hint of impatience.

"Well…what?" Ed asked, confused.

"What's so funny? Last I checked, there was nothing funny going on. Is there some joke you'd like to share?" Roy asked, now sounding mildly unamused by the fact that the blonde had the audacity to actually _snort_ at a situation as grave as the one they had been in only moments before.

"Nothing's funny, _Colonel_. At any rate, it's none of your business," Ed snapped, starting to feel slightly irritated himself.

Inside, Roy was telling himself not to say anything, to let that little remark pass, but he never was one to like being one-upped in anything, not even a small argument. "You know, if anyone should be laughing, it should be me. I don't know what you thought you were doing, but it was pretty pathetic."

Ed suddenly felt an odd tightening in his throat different from before. He had an urge to cry, but it wasn't out of happiness. He felt hurt and dejected in a way he never had before. This somehow felt worse than anything he'd ever experienced before.

"What did you expect? I had to do something to get you back, you stupid…ugh!" He slid back, tripping over his own feet and falling to the ground hard. He slowly stood, grabbing his jacket and putting it on with less-than-great ease, not caring that it was on crooked or that he was leaving his books and research materials behind. His automail suddenly felt very heavy and all he really wanted was to go to sleep, to pretend that the whole thing was little more than a dream that he could forget.

Roy sighed. He should have expected this. How could he have thought for a second that the boy had grown up any over the past few years? Sure, he'd been through a lot, but he was still just a _boy_.

He watched the blonde stumble, grabbing his jacket and putting it on as if he hadn't worn a jacket for the better part of his life. It was sad, but didn't really faze Roy, as he was still feeling the after burn of his anger. He could have cared less about what happened to the kid at that moment.

However, all that anger seemed to dissipate as he caught a flicker of light that gleamed from the corner of the blonde's eye. He couldn't believe what he was seeing. Was Edward actually…_crying?_ It didn't seem possible, but as reason came back to him, Roy distinctively remembered hearing his voice crack as he choked out that last retort.

He instantly felt like slapping himself. He'd been so busy mentally chiding Edward that he hadn't realized how childish he himself had been. It was quickly becoming a "two steps forward, ten steps back" situation in their relationship. At this rate, they would be over before they'd even had a chance to start.

Roy paused, holding his breath as he went over his last thoughts. Was he actually _considering_ starting something with the young man? It was risky even _thinking_ about it. Still, it wasn't like he had anything great to lose; his career, perhaps, a little reputation he barely cared anything for, but nothing more.

He sighed. Though it was probably going to end in disaster, it was still worth a shot. If anything, it would be amusing, at least. After all, he hadn't had a decent date in what felt like months, despite his "seemingly-valiant, yet-pitiful-to-previous-standards" attempts to make things work with someone. Passing thoughts he'd had about the younger alchemist hadn't really helped matters, either. It was hard to be charming and alluring when his thoughts kept drifting to a certain ill-mannered brat with his own little God complex.

As much as he hated to admit it, maybe…maybe the short-tempered little blonde was exactly what he needed…he'd spent so long fighting the notion…but his thoughts always went back to him…to Edward…and those things he'd said before, was he just wounded in pride, or had they really, actually, literally _hurt_ him?

Roy broke out of his contemplative state just as Ed reached the door. He was instantly on his feet, next to the blonde with one hand on his arm and the other on the door.

"Hey, what are y-let go of me!" the smaller male shouted, reeling back as if he was falling again. Roy tightened his grip on Ed, pulling him forward and into his arms. Had it been a woman he was trying to convince to stay, it would have been romantic. However, this was Ed being dissuaded, and so it was rather…awkward.

"Wha-what are you doing? Are you _insane?!_ Have you lost your ever-loving mind? You can't just act like a jerk and expect me to—"

"Be. _Quiet_. Edward," Roy said shortly, punching out each syllable, making sure that he was heard. "Just listen, okay? I'm…" He nearly choked. He'd apologized before, but mostly because there was something to be truly sorry for. This was just ludicrous. Still, he had to offer some sort of olive branch if this was going to work. The white flag had to go up. He had to be the one to bite the bullet for the sake of their potential future. That didn't make it any easier, though.

Ed rolled his eyes at Roy's inability to get out what he was going to say. "Never mind. Don't worry, Colonel Pompous, we won't be late reporting for duty. You don't have to go making any kind of peace on my behalf." He turned to leave again but found that the older man had an iron-clad grip on his arm. Had it been his flesh arm, he would no doubt be cutting off all circulation.

The blonde groaned. "Seriously, Mustang, if you don't let me go, I'm going to have to cut your hand off and take it with me."

"Just wait, would you, Fullmetal? Do you have to be in a hurry to do _everything?_" Roy asked irritably, irate at the thought of losing his nerve over someone not willing to give him the time of day. "I'm just…ugh, I'm _sorry, _okay? I didn't mean to get sh-angry with you. If I…upset you, it wasn't my intention." He looked at the floor, feeling extremely humbled as he had never before in his life.

A golden eyebrow raised slightly, giving Ed a strange quizzical look. Had the situation been any different, one might have laughed.

_Did he just…apologize…to me? _Ed pondered, too shocked to believe what he had heard. His eyes widened in surprised. _And that word…it was a perfect time to lay on the short jokes, but he didn't. What is going on?_

Staring at the man before him, he felt it happen. Not that he wanted it to. Not that he could control it. It just happened…

His ego was swelling, as it had a tendency to do.

He smirked. "Well, I don't know…you _were_ kinda harsh. I just don't know if I can get past that."

Roy could feel his eye twitching. He had gone through all _that,_ just for that ungrateful little…

He felt his irritation wane as he looked at the grinning blonde in front of him. Though he was annoyed by the arrogance of the smaller male, he couldn't help but smile slightly. After all, an annoying little twerp was better than no twerp at all.

Again, Ed was surprised by Roy's odd behavior. "W-what are you smirking at?"

The older man shrugged. "Nothing, I guess. If you really can't get over it, then I guess I'll have to deal with that for now. Just make sure that it doesn't interfere with things at work."

"Uh…" Ed scratched the back of his head. Just what had happened between points A and B? One minute he was apologizing and acting all weird, and the next, he was right back to normal. These actions seemed too erratic for the usually impassive military officer.

"So speechless, Ed?" Roy asked, amused. "And here I thought you had a response for everything. I must've been mistaken. Well, it's like I said; don't let your little thing for me get in the way at work, and there won't be any problems."

"Wait…my little 'thing'? What exactly…makes you think I have a 'thing' for you? That kiss…er-thing earlier, that was nothing! I'm sick, it's been a long day, I…I…ugh!" Ed spat.

Roy smirked knowingly. When it came to a frustrated Fullmetal, things were just _too_ easy. "I never said anything about that. I was referring to your 'inability to get over how harsh I was' to put it in your terms. However, it seems that there is more we might have to keep outside of work."

It quickly became obvious that Edward Elric's circulatory system was in working order, because all the blood rushed to his face in 0.2 seconds. It was almost like insta-blush, except for the fact that it nearly covered all of his face.

If one looked closely enough, they could see the older man's face twitch ever-so-slightly as he struggled to keep that smirk from expanding into a full-blown grin.

"What's the matter, Fullmetal? You look like you're about to pass out. Must be from the lack of blood flow to your little brain…"

Suddenly, in an act of anatomical defiance, Ed's face reddened further. This time, however, it wasn't out of embarrassment. It was more like the inevitable angry backlash from embarrassment.

And Roy saw it coming. He saw it coming from miles away. Years of experience allowed him to face what could make other men would cower…or at least flinch and shake horribly from trying not to laugh.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT THEIR BRAIN LOOKS LIKE A CHEWED UP PIECE OF GUM?!"

The screeching was almost music to his ears. Almost. Though it would take him a bit of work to convince the ill-tempered, vertically-challenged alchemist that he really wasn't as bad a guy as he thought, the end result might be rewarding enough to make up for it.

"Ahh! Don't you pretend like you didn't hear me, Mr. Snappy McPyropants…" Ed hissed, fuming.

Roy nearly choked from the air that forced itself down his throat as he nearly burst out in laughter.

If he was sane by the end of this, it would be a miracle.


	14. Daydream Believer

****

A/N: Let me just say, before this goes underway, that I am…uhm…sorry. Yes. I am sorry. I am sorry this took forever and I am sorry that I could possibly go down in history as being the biggest cocktease EVAR (yes, I just said EVAR. Getovaheet. XD). But yeah, I'm sorry, because there is nothing crueler than being a cocktease to a bunch of drooling, half-rabid fangirls/boys who cruise the M section unabashedly, just looking for a good lemon. Super sorry.

That being said, GUESS WHAT I DID?! Yeah, I battled the mighty lemon monster, and I beat its ass with a pointy stick of doom. Hopefully, this will go over better than the last chapter (because I don't want my dog raped or my pancakes eaten lol). Oh, and I hope this doesn't mean you'll all skip off after this chapter, because I've seen that happen too often, and it's kinda sad. Comments trickling off after lemons…it's just wrong. Anyway, quickie disclaimer:

FMA: IT'S NOT MINE!

Much love to my dear Autumn for putting up with my BS while I was writing this. You truly are my inspiration, though you tend to molest my muse. Ily

Many thanks go to: **jonnythehomocidalmaniac****Dark Mage Makai****Shine Lumiere****, Sadler, ****Crimson lantern****catwwomen47****, Kirbychan, ****Lunadia-aloneforevermore****Meghan H.****mieko8804****Nuitari Aquarius****, anmbcuconnfan, ****AirElemental101****Bar-Ohki****GreedxEd****nanoSaby5****TaintedShikonShards****Meekah Greenleaf****Demonskid****, and theSaiyanKira.**

Incredibly huge thanks to those who keep coming back time and time again. I recognize your names and it's gotten to the point where they are in my spell check so that I don't have to go through them when I edit. You guys have been more than I could ever ask for. This lemon's for you.

As Roy sat at his desk, drumming calloused fingers on polished oak, he wondered just what he could do to persuade the young blonde chibi to partake in a relationship of some kind. It couldn't be that difficult. It wasn't like he was asking for the twerp to marry him or anything. He just wanted to spend some quality time together, to get to know the young man that had re-entered his life. Somehow, the little brat had managed to worm his way into Roy's every thought. He wasn't sure if he liked it or not. Sure, the thoughts were pleasing, but the problem was that they were a little _too_ pleasing. His job wasn't one where being easily distracted was a good thing. He needed to focus. Yet, every time he tried, that damned kiss came back to hit him like a brick wall, almost as if saying, "How dare you try to think when you have something better to do!"

Oh, and how he had something better to do. Not that he'd ever admit it aloud, but the way the blonde had kissed him was unlike anything he'd ever experienced before. If he'd had known what he was missing out on, he wouldn't have waited so long to say something.

__

No, it wouldn't have been the same. For one, he was a minor, Roy. That would have been more frowned upon then than it is now. Another thing, he's had a great deal of life experience. There was less to gain back then, and more to lose. Now that you don't have anything standing in your way…

He could do what he wanted. He could rush into something without thought, or he could take his sweet time, whichever suited his fancy. It was quite the luxury he had at his disposal, the upper hand in this situation with the young man that allowed him to take things at his own pace.

He smirked as he thought of the way the blonde had left in a hurry, seemingly embarrassed at his inability to come up with proper witty comebacks. Sure, the whole "Snappy McPyropants" thing was humorous in itself, but that seemed to be it. After that, it was mainly sputtering, the only discernible words being "bastard," "shove it," and "I didn't even." The entire thing was completely riotous. The only thing it did was entertain him for the few moments before the younger alchemist decided to make a run—or rather, _stomp_—for it.

That, and it confirmed without a doubt that what the younger Elric had said was completely true (not that Roy ever suspected the teen to have been making false claims). In fact, the idea of Alphonse Elric lying in any way, shape, or form, seemed absolutely ridiculous. Still, he couldn't help but wonder if maybe there had just been some mixed signals that were misinterpreted.

Nope. Not this time. This time, the younger sibling had been dead-on in his suspicions, and it turned out in Roy's favor. Still, it left him with a great dilemma:

What was he going to do about Edward?

He'd never dealt with anything quite like this before. It was strange, the way that he felt about the sharp-tongued alchemist. It was almost like he was…_nervous_ or something. This was incredibly hilarious, because Roy couldn't really remember ever being nervous before in his entire life. Sure, there were times during his early military career, and during the war, but when it came to romance and relationships, not one moment had passed where he was nervous around another person because of the way he felt about them.

The more he thought about it, the greater his urge to laugh became, because it really was laughable, the way the blonde made him feel sometimes. He was a grown man with _plenty_ of experience in the game of love, and yet, a man—no, a damned _kid_—made him feel like a schoolboy with a crush.

Maybe that was what he liked best about Edward. He didn't make Roy feel so _old_. More than once the colonel had thought on his age and how it was remarkable that he hadn't really settled down yet. After all, his own best friend had done at such a young age, and he'd seemed pretty content. Maybe that's all Roy really needed. The only thing that had really gotten in his way was something no one could have possibly ever suspected of the dark-haired military officer…

Roy Mustang was a total closet romantic. He loved romantic comedies. Tragic novels made him tear up. More than once, he'd find himself curled up on the sofa before a roaring fire, reading his favorite novel and thinking that perhaps, someday, he'd find something like that for himself.

One would think that wouldn't be too difficult a feat for one such as the infamous Roy Mustang, but it was much more difficult than anyone realized. Women simply fell too easily for Roy's liking. He wanted someone fiery and passionate, just as he was. Had it really been too much to ask to find one woman who matched him in wit and who wasn't completely submissive or easily charmed?

Obviously, it had been. Yes, there had been Hawkeye, and he'd tried, really he had. It was just that he'd known Riza for so long that it felt too odd to even think of her as a romantic interest. He loved her fondly, like a good friend, or even possibly a sister, but nothing more. Besides, for all his griping about never getting a date, Jean Havoc held a candle for Riza, and he knew that. There was no way he could steal her away. It was true that he had stolen other dates from Jean in the past, but that was because he knew the truth, that none of those women would ever compare to Riza in the second lieutenant's eyes, no matter what they did.

Roy sighed heavily. He'd never really known what he'd been missing until it hit him squarely in-between the eyes…literally. He'd been cleaning out some old file cabinets while working extra hours one weekend and something just happened to fall out of the top while he was kneeling down and hit him hard. After much swearing and yelling, he finally found that which had assaulted him. It was a silver-framed picture of all of them together: him, with his hands in his pockets, pretending that he had better things to do; Riza, not really smiling, but not frowning either; Jean, with his impossible smirk and the cigarette dangling out of his mouth; Breda and Fuery, standing as if they _didn't_ have anything better to do; Falman, with his insanely straight posture and stoic expression, Armstrong, who was too tall to even really fit in the photograph, as always, though his strange aura managed to let you know it was him (as if the large frame wasn't a dead giveaway); Maes, who had one arm around Roy's shoulders and the other resting on the shoulder of one very-irked looking Edward, who looked quite a bit like Roy had—as if he had better things to do than to take a picture. The internal punch that had hit him was far more painful than the frame could have ever been, even if it had been _thrown_ at his head.

At first, he had dismissed it as simply pangs from missing his best friend, but one night, it just dawned on him…

__

Edward. He missed Edward. He missed the one person who had never been afraid of him, the one person who had never showed any kind of reverence in the least. He missed the one person who treated him like he felt he deserved to be treated. And it hurt. It hurt way more than he was willing to admit at the time.

And now, now that he knew everything, that he had everything figured out, he wasn't doing a thing about it. Sure, he'd shown the blonde that he was slightly interested; he'd started the wheels to turning in the young prodigy's head, which would ultimately lead up to something, but it wasn't working as fast as he wanted it to. For all his insane romantic notions, he couldn't seem to kill his pride enough to admit to the elder Elric exactly what he felt.

Killing pride…somehow the irony was not as funny as it should have been. In fact, if he wasn't embroiled in a heated dispute with his id, he might have actually laughed at the strange coincidence. However, he was stressing out over the entire ordeal, and it was giving him a rather large headache.

He rubbed the bridge of his nose and decided that it would be an excellent time to take a small nap, while Hawkeye was out for the afternoon. Sure, he'd probably wake to the barrel of a gun being pointed at his head, but the few hours' sleep would be worth it. He laid his head on his desk and felt himself drifting off.

__

He awoke to the sound of heavy footsteps approaching his desk. The footsteps were uneven, so it could only really be one person. Perhaps, if he was very still, he could feign slumber and he would be left in peace. There wasn't really anything to be said between them, anyway; nothing that would help his cause, at least.

He remained still, waiting for the footsteps to retreat, but they never did. After what seemed like an eternity, he tried moving his head so that he could see in front of him. To his surprise, there was no one there. This assumption was quickly disproved as he felt hot breath on his neck. He felt his own breath quickly disappear from his lungs as his heart began ramming in his chest. He was grateful that he was sitting, because if he'd been on his feet, it would have been difficult to stay upright.

Actually, it wouldn't be that hard, considering how easy it was to keep some things upright…

He gasped as that thought crossed his mind, though he wasn't sure if it was caused by the thought or the fact that there were now fingers gently playing with his hair at the base of his neck. Either way, it must've become obvious that he wasn't asleep, for the fingers slowed and stilled, resting on his neck, just above his shoulders.

Roy remained absolutely still, hoping that the person he knew was behind him would just give up and go away—though he seriously doubted that would happen. Giving up and Edward Elric just didn't go well together. If they had, the younger Elric would still be a walking tin can. His persistence and determination were actually a couple of the things that Roy loved about him…even if his stubbornness had a tendency to irk the older man at times.

Those qualities were most definitely not irksome at the moment, for a chill shot up Roy's spine as the fingers left his hair and started tracing a path down his back, resting on his hips and sitting there before sliding down to rest between his legs. He held his breath for what seemed like an eternity, hoping that somehow fate would be kind and get him away from his current situation. However, fate seemed to know that wasn't what he really wanted, because the hands slid to gently cup his slowly forming erection, which was currently standing at half-mast. His breath hitched as the fingers gave a light squeeze, and it took all his long-earned military discipline not to let a moan slip past his lips. Instead, it formed a large lump in his throat, becoming an obstruction to his very airway.

He could practically hear the blonde's smirk as the hands disappeared and hot breath began to beat on his ear. He could feel the hairs on the back of his neck raise as he listened to the slow and almost methodical breathing of the one he had yet to actually look at. He was almost certain, however, that if he did take a look at the younger alchemist, no amount of will would be able to keep him from latching onto the young man. Hawkeye could come in and shoot him for all he cared.

Right now, the only thing he was focused on was the sound of breathing in his ear and the fingers that were slowly making their way across the back of his neck, causing chills to run down his spine. The warm air being breathed upon his ear suddenly left, traveling down to his neck, beating down on him as a pair of soft lips began to leave soft kisses and the fingers began to trace circles along his back.

The whole time, Roy couldn't help but think, "I must be in hell…this torture must be karma coming back to kick me in the head for all the times I teased him…this can't be humane, by any means…"

His thoughts were interrupted as the lips left his neck and the sound of breathing returned to his ear. He swallowed down a giant lump in his throat, wondering how things had progressed to the point where he was the one in disbelief, instead of the other way around. Surely there had to be a way to change matters, to turn the tables. He never got the chance to fully formulate a plan, for the moment he began plotting, a voice cut through the air, causing Roy to stop what he was thinking and hold his breath.

"I know you're awake, bastard. You can't fool me," Edward said. There was the usual biting tone in his voice, yet there was also something different. It was almost as if he was…teasing_ Roy._

Smirking, Roy sat up and looked at the blonde, though what he saw was not what he had expected. The young man was dressed in what appeared to be a loose-fitting dress shirt and pants akin to the ones he used to wear, back when he was younger. It was like a weird combination of Old Ed and New Edward, boy and man, all in one. It was both distressing and oddly arousing.

Roy never had a moment to comment on the unusual attire, however, because the moment he sat up, he was jerked forward by his collar and Ed's mouth automatically latched onto his. He was jerked out of his seat and dragged over to one of the nearby sofas, which he was then flung onto, the blonde leaning over him with an almost-menacing light to his face. It was amazing, really, how strong Edward had become, because he seemed to do this effortlessly, taking complete control of the situation.

Or, perhaps Roy just didn't want to fight him. Either way, it really didn't matter, since it appeared that there was nothing he could do about the situation he was in; all he could do was lie back and take it like a man (figuratively and literally).

Wait, when did this suddenly end in sex? So the kid finally got some backbone—_or front bone, depending on the point of view. So what? It didn't mean that it was going to end that way, and Roy was almost ashamed of himself for thinking so._

Obviously Ed wasn't too worried about it, because Roy was soon ripped from his thoughts by a rough jerking on his pants. Before he could say anything about it, his pants were free from his legs and the blonde was intently working on freeing his erection from its crisp cotton prison.

He would have done something about that (maybe), but the second he went to say something akin to, "I don't think you should do that," or "you really don't have to," the first syllable was swallowed in a quick gasp, as the head of said erection was quickly consumed. Ed ran his tongue up Roy's shaft, causing the older man to shudder. He began sucking and massaging the tip with his tongue, and Roy wondered briefly just where the young alchemist had acquired his skills.

Any mood-ruining questions that might have surfaced were immediately forced down as Ed decided that Roy was being too quiet for his liking, and began to bob his head up and down in a hurried pace. Roy's jaw clenched and he tried to fight the moan that was quickly building in his throat. It was to no avail, however, because it managed to fight to the surface, pushing past the point-of-no-return and escaping into the free air. Ed seemed to perk up after that, smirking as he pulled back and sat on his knees between Roy's parted legs. Roy tried to batter down the pangs of disappointment.

Any such pangs were quickly pushed aside as the blonde stood up and began to undress, shedding his clothes and climbing atop Roy again. The dark-haired man felt his face redden slightly, which caused his heart to ram in his chest. It was exhilarating, how nervous he was becoming, and it was painfully refreshing to be reminded of what it was like to feel a sense of want—something Roy sorely missed, since he hadn't genuinely wanted anything or anyone in quite a long time.

Roy nearly swallowed his tongue as Ed began to lower himself, without warning, onto Roy's impossibly-hardened erection. The expression on the younger male's face was enough to make him want to cum right then and there, but he managed to hold back, not wanting to ruin the moment. It didn't seem like the metal-limbed alchemist was too concerned with pain, for within a few brief moments, he was quickly raising and lowering himself onto Roy, riding him roughly and moaning deep in his throat.

Suddenly, his eyes widened and his pace increased, his breath coming in short bursts. Though Roy hadn't had sex in what seemed like forever, he knew that look. It was the look of someone reaching their peak, and from the looks of it, Ed was coming hard and fast.

"God, Roy…ahhh," he hissed under his breath, throwing his head back as he rode out his orgasm, his muscles contracting harshly.

The pressure on his pulsing organ and the sound of his name were enough to throw Roy into an orgasm of his own, which was quite unlike anything he'd ever felt before.

Yet, it felt…odd, somehow, as if he was detached from it, the sensation seeming miles away instead of right in front of him.

That's when it hit him: he was dreaming. He had to be. Too many things just didn't add up. First, there was no way in Hell that the blonde would just come in and practically throw Roy around. Yes, he was demanding and pushy, but Roy had a feeling that he wasn't so forward in certain things, sex being one of them. Second, Ed had been far too quiet. Ed was loud in all things, regardless of what they were. Sex wouldn't be an exception. Finally, even though they had been relatively quiet, Roy usually had heavy traffic in his office, enough to the point where someone was always bugging him at least once every five minutes.

Yes, something was terribly amiss. The signs were too big to ignore. He had to be dreaming.

Damnit.


	15. Just a little note from AL

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A/N: Hey guys, I was sitting around reading the newest reviews, and one just kinda stuck on me, from littlelibra. I figured I should leave a little note for my awesome readers. So here goes…

I had been taking my sweet time writing the next chapter, hoping to make it a good one, and I always imagined I'd get to cracking on it, but last Monday I was in a car accident. I broke my left clavicle in two places (collarbone for those less anatomically inclined…) and I'm basically writing with one hand. I really want to write now, and I'm going to start setting aside time to do so, now that I'm out of work for awhile…

So yeah, just wanted to let you know, since I figured an explanation was in order. I hope that doesn't deter any of you from continuing to read and review. I am so grateful for all of the support I've received thus far, and we all know I can't just leave our beloved Roy and Ed hanging, so I plan to pan this out, and start working on the sequel ASAP.

Anyway, just hang tight, and I'll start working on the next chapter as soon as I can.

Thanks for everything.

-A.L.


	16. A Cat Outta the Bag is One Ed Don't Want

-1**A/N: Hiiii again! So glad to have both my hands in full use again…I can tell you, if you EVER break anything, never break your collarbone. It sucks hardcore. But thank you sooooo much for the lovely messages of support. It made me feel special. You know, not like "short bus" special, just "warm-n-fuzzy" special. Anyway, I think I've held out long enough.**

**Thanks goes to (oh great Shiva, here we go…): Kirbychan, TaintedShikonShards, SoubiAgatsumaSama, zst4ever, AAJ Edward, Nienna Ringeril, Evil Pixies Are Yummy, anmbcuconnfan, ai-08, The Lady Morana, inuyasha-demon-lover, Sophie, Nuitari Aquarius, joe90, Glue Project, Crimson lantern, Chelsea, catwwomen47, ThexYaoixNinja, Bar-Ohki, BlazenFantasy (welcome to the dark side, friend), the Sayjin Kira, Dark Mage Makai, KeveTenjoin, littlelibra, Ebony Cassandra selene Ridd..., KajiMori, Phantomsnow, Crazy4Skittles, edluver14, Kikiko, GreedxEd, Krystal T. M., Daeleniel Shadowphyre, Sadler, Meekah Greenleaf, mieko8804, anmbcuconnfan, Shine Lumiere, Visual Confectionary, and everyone else who has been reading this and who has left me lovely comments of support in the past. I really am grateful to have such great readers who enjoy FMA just as much as I do. Anyway, without further ado, the next installment of "A Lot to Make Up For."**

**Disclaimer: FMA does not, nor has it ever belonged to me. If it did, I'd be able to pay my medical bills more easily. Plus, can anyone sayyyy EDINADRESS?! Yeah, it's THAT cute. **

Roy opened his eyes to a rapid heartbeat and a rather hard, aching problem. He sighed, feeling more than slightly dejected. It had been a dream? Of course it had; nothing that good ever happened to him in real life. He glanced down at the bulge sticking out rather prominently from his lap. He shook his head in frustration. There was no way he was going to be able to relieve himself; at least, not in the position he was now. His best bet was to try and avoid all contact with other people until he could make it to the bathroom, where he could fix his not-so-little problem.

That aspect of the task, in itself, was not all that appealing. After all, Roy had never been one to pleasure himself in public facilities, but at that moment, he'd do almost anything short of taking care of it right then and there; anything to escape the inevitable embarrassment and inquiry from his co-workers, who knew him all-too-well, and would know exactly when he was lying.

Oh, the lies he would have to tell to get out of this one…

His head snapped up at the sound of the doorknob being turned. He quickly set his head on his desk and folded his arms around his head. With any luck, he could feign sleep and would be left alone…unless it was Hawkeye, of course, but she had already proven that she knew more than everyone else, so it wasn't something he couldn't live down. At any rate, Riza Hawkeye wasn't one he had to lie to. She really _did_ know everything, and thus, didn't even have to ask questions. She just let certain things slide by her…at her own discretion, of course. Roy smiled at the recollections of all she had done for him over the years.

He would _definitely_ have to buy her some flowers or something one of these days.

He shut his eyes as the sound of loud and uneven footfall neared his desk. He held his breath and waited for the person to retreat, but they never did. Instead the feeling of cold steel brushed across his neck, causing him to jump a little, which removed the metal from his neck. He could hear the sound of erratic, heavy breathing nearby, but he couldn't really tell how close it was, which alarmed him, since he prided himself on having excellent hearing skills.

His thoughts were interrupted as a light sigh and a voice broke through the silence.

"I know you're awake, bastard. You can't fool me," Ed said softly.

Roy smirked and lifted his head, met by the sight of a slightly irked-yet-amused blonde in dark slacks and an off-white, loose-fitting dress shirt.

Wait, wasn't this how his dream began? True, it wasn't _exactly_ the same, but the similarities were just too eerie to ignore. He was about to open his mouth and say something to break the odd feeling of déjà vu he had coming over him, but he was beat to the punch.

Ed grinned and shook his head at Roy. "You must think I'm pretty stupid if you thought I'd actually believe you were sleeping. I've seen you sleeping before. You drool."

Roy quirked an eyebrow but remained silent. It was no secret that he had fallen asleep at his desk on more than one occasion. It wasn't something he was proud of, but it wasn't something he was exactly ashamed of, either. The way he saw it, his work ethic wasn't on trial. What the blonde was doing in his office, however, was something to be inquired about.

"What's it to you, Squirt? It's not like you don't drool. You'd probably drown if your brother didn't clean up after you," he said teasingly.

Edward's eyes narrowed. "Sorry I'm not all pristine and proper like you, Colonel Ass," he said, followed by grumbling that sounded an awful lot like "stuck up old bastard."

Roy sighed, resting his chin in his palm. No, this was definitely _not_ like his dream. As if on cue, images from his not-so-long-ago dream sprang to mind, causing something else to spring as well. He sighed indignantly. He had to take care of this. First, he had to get rid of the object of said current problem.

"Listen, Fullmetal, if this isn't something of extreme importance—and I have a feeling that it really _isn't_—I have something that I need to deal with at the moment much more pressing than listening to you complain," he said, voice strained.

Yes, there was definitely something more pressing, and it was pressing rather uncomfortably against the rough fabric of his ridiculously starched boxers. He secretly cursed inheriting his father's absurd habits.

Edward scratched the back of his head, shifting his weight from one foot to the other nervously. Any other day, he'd be angry at the older man's attempt to shoo him out of his office, but this day was different. This day wasn't going to be like the others.

He'd spent the better part of the night before, thinking about everything that had happened between him and the colonel in the years they'd known each other. From the night the then-younger lt. colonel had come to Pinako's, talking about looking for their father, he'd found something intriguing about the man. He'd never really had any kind of crush on anyone before, but he was almost certain now that was what he felt in those moments, with his eyes closed and only a voice to describe the military officer who had intruded after one of the worst—if not _the _worst—moments of his life. He knew what he felt now, because he still felt it. No matter how bad his day was, all he had to do was hear that voice, and everything seemed to fade away, as if it didn't even exist.

It had been difficult, those first few years between the two. Ed wasn't even entirely sure then what he felt, but he knew he felt _something,_ and it had scared the Hell out of him. He always dreaded going to see Mustang, knowing that the second he was there, he'd feel strange, and then his mouth would start running to try and compensate. Sure, his mouth had gotten him in trouble with people before, but for some reason, he'd hated it most when his dark-haired superior was irked with him. It made him almost _hurt,_ in ways that he neither understood, nor wanted to.

He stood there, contemplating all of the things he wanted to try and say, and ways to say them without seeming too forward or overly pathetic. He still wanted to try and salvage some of his dignity, if there was anything left to save.

"I uh…wanted to talk to you," he said, feeling extremely awkward. "About the other day…in the library."

Roy opened his mouth to tell the blonde that any qualms he had could wait, but was abruptly silenced after the mentioning of the events in the library. He could wait. This was definitely worth hearing.

At seeing the sudden pause of the man before him, Ed felt his stomach quiver a little. He'd never been so close to actually blurting out what was on his mind right at that moment. Actually, he'd done that many times before, but damnit, this was important! It wasn't like he could go out and openly declare his love or anything.

_Love?! What the Hell? Where did that come from?! _Edward's mind screeched. No, he did not, _could_ not, love this man. It would put too many things he'd worked so hard to get in line completely out of whack. Everything was fine now; his brother's body was back, they were home, and that's all that mattered. Right?

Obviously not, as his head was still spinning, his heart was racing, and his mouth was drier than the Eastern desert. He sat there, gaping like a fish for a few moments, before regaining his composure…only to lose it again when he realized that the other man was staring at him intently. He sputtered for a second before finally getting straight and taking a deep breath to calm himself.

"Right! Yes, about the other day, I uh…I just wanted to say…I didn't…don't know if you uh…," he stammered, trying to find the words that just wouldn't form on his lips.

Roy could only sit and smirk with satisfaction. Leave it to the Fullmetal one to make his job all-too easy for him. To think he'd thought he'd have a hard time persuading the young man…

Ed groaned in frustration. He didn't even know what he was doing there, trying to get things straightened out with the bastard. What did he care? It wasn't as if he wasn't going to be able to work or anything.

Ah right, work. He had to _work_ at it. Alphonse had told him he needed to do this, the night Ed came home from the library, flustered and out of sorts. Oh yes, Al was definitely going to pay for this one…

_Ed rushed in, tripping over his feet and swearing loud enough for half of Central to hear. He kicked at imaginary objects before throwing his jacket on his bed and flopping down on a nearby sofa. He rubbed his eyes wearily before he was startled by a voice._

"_Hard day, Brother?" Al asked, smirking knowingly._

_Ed jumped, falling onto the ground, face first. When he was finally done twitching, he tried to right his body, since his upper half was on the ground, his face turned to the side, and his legs were dangling in the air, while his midsection seemed to be propped up by the sofa. It looked as if he'd tried to do a back flip that backfired miserably._

_The younger Elric did nothing; he simply sat and laughed at his brother's feeble attempts to correct his body. Edward, too angry to realize all he had to do was twist his waist and he'd be on the floor, growled and squirmed in vain._

"_Hey! What kind of brother are you! I'm dying here! Quit laughing and help me! Alllllllllll!!!!!" Ed screamed, though it sounded more like whining._

_Alphonse laughed and strolled over to where his brother lay in "mortal peril," grabbed a leg, and spun him around, so that he was flat on his back, spread eagle against the polished wood floor._

"_Owww…" Ed groaned. "So dizzy…you didn't have to pull THAT hard!"_

_Al smiled and shook his head, walking back to his bed and sitting down, picking up his book and resumed reading._

_Ed stood up and flopped back down on the sofa, lazily swinging a leg up to prop on the back, and leaning his head over an arm cushion. "What, not gonna ask me how my day was?"_

_Al quirked an eyebrow and, without looking up from his book, responded, "I don't know if you noticed, with your flopping around and assault on that poor sofa, but I already did."_

_Ed narrowed his eyes at his younger brother in mild contempt. "If I didn't know any better, Al, I'd say you've been spending too much time around Colonel Jackass…the resemblance is creepy."_

_Alphonse simply rolled his eyes and kept reading. After a few moments of silence, he sighed and closed his book. This had gone on long enough._

"_You fought with Colonel Mustang again today, didn't you?" he asked._

_Ed frowned, recalling the day's events, which caused him to blush. He turned his head towards the back of the couch, so that his younger sibling couldn't witness the embarrassment on his face._

"_I dunno if 'fought' is really the right word to explain it, Al. It's just…complicated," Edward responded, gently touching his own lips with his finger. Yes, he'd kissed Roy; it had been his doing, and there just wasn't any other way to explain it. Things really were getting complicated, and there was nothing that he could do to stop it._

_After a few more heavy moments of silence passed, Al finally decided that now was the time to end it. Now, he had to make his brother face everything, before he did something that could get them into some real trouble._

"_You like him, don't you?" he said quietly, just loud enough to catch his brother's attention._

_Ed sat up quickly, spinning around to look at his younger brother. For a minute, he didn't know what to say. It'd seemingly come out of nowhere, this uncharacteristic move of Alphonse's, for he was never one to go rushing into any kind of conflict. Now, however, he seemed to be staring right at his brother, daring him to say something in denial._

"_I uh…well…," Edward began, scratching his head. "I guess I…"_

"_Don't lie," Al interjected. "Please, Brother, just say it. I already know, as I've known for a long time…I just didn't want to push you and strain things more than they already were."_

_Ed simply sat there, speechless as to what to say. Had things really been that bad off? Had it been so tough that his own brother couldn't say anything to him, for fear it could separate them again?_

_The thought was shaken from his mind as Al's voice brought him back to the present, once again. "Really, it's okay that you do, Brother. I don't mind. I just hate seeing you drive yourself crazy like this."_

_Ed looked at his brother, carefully examining his sibling to see if perhaps someone else's soul had shoved their way into his body during their passage between worlds. It was seeming extremely likely that he'd smacked his head during their landing. He'd somehow imagined this going a different way, something more akin to: _

_Ed: "Hey Al, guess what? I think I'm infatuated with Roy Mustang."_

_Al: … thud_

_Or…_

_Ed: "Al, I don't know how to tell you this, but I think I have feelings for Roy."_

_Al: "YOU'RE NOT MY BROTHER!"_

_Ed was simply stunned at his brother's seemingly passive way of accepting the truth he himself had yet to truly grasp. He wanted to ask how long he'd known, but that would almost be asking for trouble. If he'd found out that his younger brother had known for…well, as long as he'd known…Al always was perceptive…_

_Al sighed, for he could practically hear the wheels turning in his brother's head, and that was never a good thing. He shook his head and went back to his book. As long as Ed remained impossibly oblivious, there was no way he could ever help him._

_However, it was Al's turn to be surprised, as Ed's voice broke through the awkward haze that had settled between the two Elrics._

"_I guess I do," he said quietly. Al's head snapped up in attention. Ed scratched the back of his head and continued. "I mean, I've always known that there was something, but I'd always just kinda figured that it wasn't anything important. Maybe I hated the guy that much. Maybe I was just impressed, or maybe I respected him in some weird way. It wasn't until I'd left that I really began to understand fully just what it was…even now, I'm not entirely certain, because I don't think it's remotely possible, but who knows? The world works in strange ways, Al, and I'm never one to count anything out, no matter how strange it may be."_

_Al rose and walked over to sit by his brother. Draping an arm over his older sibling, he smiled and said what he'd been wanting to say for the longest time. "Brother, if you really want anything to be resolved, you're going to have to do something about it. Sitting on feelings like this isn't healthy. You should at least say something. Even if nothing else, the worst thing that can happen is the feelings aren't reciprocated." He smiled in reassurance._

_Ed sighed. "Reciprocated…but…"_

_But there was no way they could be. Chances are, the colonel had caught wind of Ed's predicament, and was just finding a way to taunt him. Though Ed was almost certain Roy had meant everything—even he wasn't that cruel—he couldn't know for sure…not until he talked to him. Therein laid the problem; he wasn't sure he could get out what he wanted to say without looking like a total moron._

_Ed groaned. This was going to be humiliating._

And how humiliating it was. He could think of a million things he could rather be doing: reading, doing research, getting hit in the head with a wrench…

_Wait, had he actually thought that getting knocked nearly to the Gate by a metal tool, usually wielded by a hormonally imbalanced blonde mechanic, was preferable to this?!_

"Ah, forget it! This is a waste of my time!" Ed shouted, turning on his heels and walking off in a huff. The door was halfway open when a voice stopped him.

"Edward…" Roy said quietly, almost too quietly for Ed to hear.

Ed turned, looking at the floor, not really wanting to look up at the older man, but knowing that if he wanted to salvage any bit of dignity, he'd have to look this in the face and take it head-on.

"Come here, Edward," Roy said sternly, letting Ed know that this wasn't something Roy was asking for. It was an order, and one Ed didn't have the choice to disobey.

Ed slowly walked over to the desk, eyes still intently on the floor, as if inspecting something interesting. No matter what, he was going to take everything as he always should have: like an adult, and without complaint. Al was right; there really was no way to resolve this by just letting things slide.

"Edward," Roy said again, this time more softly. "Ed, look at me."

The blonde swallowed. Time to bite the bullet.

He raised his eyes and was alarmed at the sight that met them.

**Okay, so there it was, in all it's saaaad little glory. I promise to get to hacking on the next chapter…I'm just sidetracked at the moment, with moving into my new apartment next month (yay!) and working on this sequel…I know, you're thinking, "OMG A SEQUEL? AS IN, THAT WHICH FOLLOWS THE FIRST, WHICH WOULD BE THIS? WHICH WOULD BE OMGOMGOMG!" …okay, maybe not THAT bad, but I promise, it's a real kicker. XD**

**Oh sweet baby Jesus…I just used the word "kicker." I am becoming my grandmother…**


	17. Whatever It Takes

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A/N: I know this is very short, but I need a quick interlude before I go switching the tone on you. Up til now, it's been a humorous game of "ring around the relationship," but to try and get this done as soon as humanly possible, I will need to do a quick change of pace. So thanks for being super-patient with me, and I'll do what I can to get this next chapter out. Now I know how I'm going to end this, so it should be smooth sailing from here on out…I hope…

A quick thanks to: **Nienna Ringeril****Hubert111****the Sayjin Kira****ThexYaoixNinja****Afrieal****Paon****Dark Mage Makai****mieko8804****, too-lazy-to-login, ****Kikiko****GreedxEd****The Lady Morana****I love Malfoy as a ferret****Sadler****, and ****Bar-Ohki**

Before I carry on, since this is such a lovely short little ditty, I thought I'd take the time to address some of the lovely comments mentioned above. So, here goes…for the lovely rabid fangirls out there, I hand thee a bucket in which you can contain your drool. I know, kinda gross, but it gets everywhere otherwise, and that's just not pretty. For those of you who got a good laugh out of the last chapter, I'm all-too glad to hear it. I actually sit and read over everything I wrote before. Sometimes I'm laughing so hard I'm like, "Did I actually WRITE that?" Yeah, yeah I did. XD Oh, there are those of you who have noted my affinity for cliffhangers. Why do I like them? Well…uh…because I'm sadistic…annnnd…it keeps ya'll reading, right? That's what's most important. So yeah, that's about as much as I'll add for now, and I'll let you all read the sad little bit of resolution I decided to add before switching it up a bit. Please, stay patient with me. It's going to get plot-heavy for a little bit, but I PROMISE you all shall be richly rewarded for your loyalty. I just need to get this out of my system, and then the sequel will be nothing but funny and well…LEMONLEMONLEMON. XDDD

Oh, one more thing. I know most of you have myspaces, so get to adding me! I'd love to meet some of the individuals whose comments make me laugh each time I read them! (check profile for myspace address) Add me. Just remember to send a message after you do so I'll know who you are. Kay?

Disclaimer: No mine. Go elsewhere. NO FMA FO YEW! XDDD

As the blonde raised his eyes, he was met by Roy, who was holding out a folder.

"Before you go, I want you to take this. Look through it for a few days, and then report back to me. It's your next assignment. I want you to take some time to think about whether or not you really want to go through this," Roy said, something Ed couldn't distinguish lining his voice.

It all made sense to him, though it didn't make sense at all. "Go through with this…but I thought you'd already taken care of our papers…I thought we were already signed up," Ed said, confused.

Roy shook his head. "I thought I'd give you some time to think it over first. I couldn't just throw you into something without giving you time to get re-adjusted. Sure, it looked strange, since everyone else thought you'd just disappeared, but since I knew better…" He paused, a look of concern crossing his face for a moment, then disappearing. "Anyway, I couldn't let you go get your brother and yourself killed. You're a greater asset to this military than you realize, Ed, and if something were to happen to you…" He swallowed. "Well, I wouldn't want it to be my problem. I have enough to worry about."

Edward was about to get angry at Roy's lack of concern for him and Al, when something occurred in his mind that hadn't before. What was he going to say before? He was going to say something before snapping out that indifferent comment. Did he…he actually seemed like he…cared…

"Well, are you going, or not?" Roy asked. "Unless you have something else to say…"

Ed shook his head, grinning. "No, nothing else. Thanks." He turned and walked out.

He was going to prove himself to Roy, even if it killed him.


	18. Nothing is Harder than Ed Skull, Right?

-1

**A/N: Woo! That was fast! It's amazing how fast the brain moves with a little sleep and some time to get work done. Since figuring out how this is going to end (since I'm a moron and seem to like writing on the fly…XD), I've come up with a million-and-one things I want to get written down. This chapter is a tad boring, but it picks up after this. Hopefully, I can wrap this up within the next five or six chapters, and then WOOSEQUEL. I've already started on it, and I'm super excited to get it underway.**

**So yeah, much thanks to: ThexYaoixNinja (yeees…cliiiiffhanggerrrrr…XDDD), anmbcuconnfan (who made me laugh uncontrollably with that last comment), Ed Fullmetal Alchemist (you said I had to, and I did. See how well I listen!), Dark Mage Makai (thanks for the well-wishes), mieko8804 (it's okay, it's better to NOT have a myspace, truuuust me), Visual Confectionary (love you, crack-head smut slut. XDDD), Paon (you'll just hafta seeeee…), I love Malfoy as a ferret (I'm glad you're excited for the sequel…oh geez, I almost typed "squeal"…), Kikiko (apparently, I am susceptible to puppy dog eyes…XD), Sophie Hape (ha, you found me on myspace! grabs the heaviest plot and sets it in your lap Oh nu! Crushed legs! lifts), and last, but hardly least, Bar-Ohki ().**

**Annnd that just proves how lazy I've been. Ah well, here it goes! straps on rock-climbing gear and grapples with anmbcuconnfan Weeeee!!!**

Ed looked over the objects laid out on his bed one last time, checking to make sure he had everything, before tossing them into his bag and sitting next to it. He glanced over at his brother, who was also double-checking to make sure he had everything before they left. It was odd, really, to look at his brother, now dressed in the customary Amestris uniform of a soldier. They were both majors now; Ed insisting that he not get a promotion that would put him above his brother. They were equal now, he and Alphonse. Therefore, they should stand equal.

Edward glanced over at the file that sat on his bedside table, the contents spread out from when he was looking over them late last night. He now understood why Roy had been so worried about throwing them back into the military. Their first assignment was to do a routine check over the procedures going on over at the Eastern front. Though it wasn't entirely dangerous, there was some concern over the small uprisings that had been popping up recently. It was supposedly an average mission, not something to be worried about, but Ed knew better. If they felt it necessary to send two skilled alchemists, then it was anything but average.

Still, he wasn't worried. Sure, he was concerned that his brother might fall into some kind of trouble, but it wasn't anything worth stressing over incessantly. If anything, he'd probably get into more trouble, as always.

"Ready to go, Brother?" Al asked, smiling at Ed.

Ed nodded, grabbing his bags and gathering the file into his hands. They only had one more stop before they got on the train for the Eastern front. They had to go see Roy.

Al set his bag down mid-hallway, just before they reached Roy's office. Ed paused, looking at Al with confusion written in his features.

"Aren't you coming, Al?" he asked.

Alphonse shook his head. "No, Brother. This is something you should do alone. I'll wait here."

Ed smiled briefly before heading into Mustang's office. Now that they were leaving for who knew how long, what would he say? Could he really leave things the way they were, without saying something? Didn't that kiss in the library mean anything?

He sighed, resigning himself to the fact that there was nothing that could be done. They were going to be stuck in this deadlock until one of them budged, and it didn't look like Roy was budging anytime soon. Being as stubborn as he was, there was no way he was budging, either. He was going to win this bout of romantic chicken, no matter what.

He opened the door and walked inside, his arms folded in front of him like some kind of security boundary that Roy Mustang could not break, regardless of what he did or said. No amount of attempts at swooning Edward would work. No sir.

Wait, had he actually thought Roy would try to _swoon_ him? What kind of romance-warped mush was his brain turning into?! He really needed to stay away from those horrible romance novels of Winry's; they were starting to make him stupid.

Roy looked up to see who was bothering to disturb him this early in the morning, and the sight that met his eyes was one that nearly stunned him into unconsciousness. Standing before him, completely clad in uniform, was one Edward Elric. While this bothered him, as it meant that he and his brother were indeed re-enlisting, he couldn't deny…that boy looked good in uniform. No doubt, it would have looked awkward on a fifteen-year-old, even more so on a twelve-year-old, but the nearly grown young man looked stunning.

Ed blushed slightly as he realized that the older man was staring at him, seemingly taking in every inch of Ed's blue-clad body. The look on his face was one Ed had never seen before, though he'd recognized it almost instantaneously. _Want._ Roy was looking at him the way a few women in Munich once had, and it was enough to make Ed want to stay right where he was, and settle everything, right there and then.

_No. You are going to prove yourself worthy. You are going to show him that he has to be serious about you…make sure his feelings are real._ Edward was almost disgusted at how feminine his thoughts had gotten, but he knew they were right, regardless. He had to prove himself worthy of Roy's attention. The best way to do that was to complete this mission, and to complete it in a way completely different than usual. He had to be official, prompt, and above all, he had to try his hardest to make sure _nothing got destroyed _this time. It was going to be a difficult task, taking care of what he said and did, but Roy was worth it. He just hoped that it would work. He wanted to show the older man more than anything that he really had grown up, and that he was someone to be taken more seriously.

"So you're going…," Roy said, making it more of a statement than a question.

"Yeah," Ed said simply, not leaving any room for doubt. He was going, regardless of what anyone said. He had to.

Roy nodded, taking the file from Edward and flipping through the pages. "All right, if that's what you want. I'm not going to try and stop you. Just remember, you're an adult now. Anything you do while you're out on assignment, you're accountable for. It's not going to be like before. You're not a kid anymore; therefore, I can't really protect you. It's time to take a little responsibility." He looked up at Ed, quirking an eyebrow. "Think you can handle that, runt?"

Ed's eye twitched, but he let it slide. True, it slid about as well as automail down a hot metal slide, but still…he could take it, right?

He swallowed hard and nodded. "Yes, sir."

Roy almost had a stroke. Did he just hear the word "sir" come out of the blonde's mouth? Had he not heard it himself, he would have _sworn_ he was dreaming again…which was entirely likely, with the way his body was reacting. The last time he recalled being addressed as "sir" by Edward Elric was just before he first boarded the train for Central, long before they'd ever met formally.

That was probably it. Had they never actually met…had Roy not insisted the boys take the earlier train…they might've never gotten off the way that they did. Then again, Ed wouldn't have gotten to take the exam, and they probably would have gotten along the same…or worse.

Roy signed the few documents necessary for the Elric's reinstatement before handing the file back to Edward. It took all he had not to heave a great sigh, or grab the young man and pull him over the desk and into his arms. Instead, he forced a lighthearted smirk and nodded to him.

As if in understanding, Edward smiled, raising his hand in a half-salute, before turning on his heel and walking towards the door. He paused for a moment, as if there was an afterthought, but shook his head and walked out the door, file in hand.

Roy felt his stomach drop. There was something about seeing the young man in uniform leave that seemed so…_final_, somehow, as if he was going to disappear again, never to return. He shook the feeling and tried to go back to work.

Ed walked over to Al, grabbing his bag and walking away. Al quickly grabbed his bag and followed. Judging by his brother's silence, Al surmised that the meeting had not gone well. Then again, had it _really_ not gone well, he would have known. Hell, half of the _building_ would have known. He sighed heavily. Things were not going as well as he'd hoped they would.

They boarded the train without incident or word. Alphonse was never so grateful to be back in the flesh again, as it had stopped the misconception that _he_ was the Fullmetal Alchemist. It wasn't as if they hadn't been there long enough for everyone to know him from his sibling, but still…if they ever ran into strangers, they would know that Ed was indeed who Ed was. As far as Al cared, he was just the tagalong brother who might be able to lend an occasional hand. His brother could have the lime light _and_ all the trouble that came along with it.

As they got seated in their own car, Al began to worry about his unusually silent brother, who was too busy staring out the window to notice his younger sibling's concerned stare. He was used to Ed's brooding, but this seemed altogether different, especially when Al knew his brother's heart was involved, and not just his easily-evoked temper. He cleared his throat to try and get Ed's attention, but when that didn't seem to work, he knew he had to find out what had transpired in Colonel Mustang's office.

"Brother," he said quietly, noting that Ed seemed to twitch slightly, which was an indication that he was heard. "Brother I…I think that there's something going on here. I don't know what happened, but whatever it is, it's not worth being upset over. I mean, I can understand if you're upset, but making yourself miserable—"

"I'm not," Ed said shortly, cutting Al off.

"But Brother, you're—" Al argued, trying to point out Ed's unusual behavior, but he was cut off again.

"Al, honestly…I'm fine, really," Ed insisted. "I'm just thinking, okay? I just want to get there and get settled in, so we can get to work and start making something of ourselves again. All this sitting around has made me anxious. I'm ready to start working towards something again." With that, he took to looking out the window again, letting Al know that the discussion was over; there would be no more conversation that train ride.

Al sighed and looked out the window at the passing scenery as well. It wasn't like his brother to get so irritated with him, nor was it like his brother to act this way. Sure, Ed was always the contemplative kind—though not always at the right time—so this was no surprise. Still, there was something in the way that the elder Elric sat that put the younger on edge. Yes, Ed had a right to his privacy, but not when it could possibly affect them both.

"Ed," Al said firmly, quickly getting his brother's attention. "Whatever happened in Colonel Mustang's office…I'm not going to make you tell me, but if there's something on your mind, you should tell me now, because I don't want you getting distracted from what we have to do here. It's unprofessional, and it's dangerous. If you're going to be like this during our stay here, I'm going to have to insist that you get on a train back to Central."

"Al…" Ed said softly, unaware that his brother had felt this strongly about what was happening to him.

Alphonse shook his head. "No, Brother, if you can't clear your head long enough to get done what we need to here, then it's going to be a problem. I don't want to have to do this alone, but I will if doing this right means having to remove you as a danger to yourself and everyone here. Do you understand?"

Edward nodded, not sure if he should be offended at the way his brother was reacting, or proud because his little brother was doing what was right. It wasn't as if Alphonse wasn't one to do the right thing; he just had a way of doing it in a less direct way. He was proving to be more like Ed with each passing day. It made him proud at the way things were going.

Still, he knew Al was right. He needed to get his head back where it needed to be. He couldn't risk blowing this, so in order to do what was needed to prove himself to Roy, he had to first put all thoughts of Roy out of his mind.

"Coming?" Al asked, motioning in the direction they had to go in order to be informed about the next few weeks' worth of work that needed to be done.

_So much to do…wonder what Roy is doing…_

Ed nearly smacked himself as he groaned in frustration. This was going to be much harder than he had anticipated.

**Ah look, no cliffhanger! I did well this time! Now, next chapter, I can't promise anything… sadistic laugh**


	19. Nagging Doubts are Best Left Unignored

**A/N: Wahhhh! I'm sorry for taking so long! I've been writing, really, but I've moved into my apt, and things are soooo hectic right now! That, and what college doesn't take out of me, work makes up for. Talk about TIRED. Anyway, I actually have a couple chapters down, and I've figured everything out, so I anticipate this finishing soon. In the meantime, I shall give ya'll this little bit to hopefully recapture your interests. Thanks!**

**Muchas gracias a: Crimson Lantern, Nuitari Aquarius, KeveTenjoin, Demonskid, zst4ever, I love Malfoy as a ferret, Paon, Nienna Ringeril, The Lady Morana, GreedxEd, Sophie Hape (my super cool myspace friend!), Dark Mage Makai, mieko8804, anmbucuconnfan, Bar-Ohki, Kikiko, Sadler, and other wonderful readers who have either commented in the past, or who simply enjoyed the story enough to add it to their favorites. I feel truly blessed to have so many with whom I can share my love that is RoyEd. XDDDD**

**Anyway, without further delay…heeeeeeere goes!**

Roy sat at his desk one rainy afternoon, hastily working away at the latest stack of meaningless documents placed upon his desk by one Lt. Hawkeye. Under normal circumstances, he would've been dreading the work load ahead, but he was steadily plowing through each stack, as if his love for the tedious boredom that was paperwork was somehow renewed. The problem was, Roy had never had any sort of love for any kind of paperwork. This was a thing of concern for anyone around him. He was working at a higher efficiency rate than he'd ever worked before.

Riza looked at the dark-haired man through the crack in the door, studying the way he scribbled his name onto each document, even taking the time to read a few. She sighed and shook her head. Something was terribly wrong with Roy Mustang, and she had an inkling of what it was.

Roy had been working tirelessly since the Elrics had left for the Eastern front. He took little time to sleep or take rest of any kind, and he was consuming unnatural amounts of caffeinated substances. It was enough to cause anyone to worry; even Havoc, who was usually too wrapped up in his own drama to notice, was concerned.

"What do you suppose it is?" Jean asked, appearing alongside Riza, who was still observing Roy through the slightly ajar doors.

Riza sighed. "Many things. Stress, mostly."

"Stress, huh?" Jean mused. "How is that different from any other day? He's always had stress. This doesn't look like any stress I've ever seen before. Besides, Mustang's not one to crack under pressure. You're acting strangely, too. Usually, you're watching him like a hawk, but you're usually in a place where he can _see_ you. Now you're reduced to spying through door cracks."

"Lieutenant, I don't think—" Riza began.

"Spare me, Riza," Jean scoffed, cutting her off. "If something's going on with the colonel, I think I have a right to know, especially if there's a chance it could inhibit him from doing his job."

Riza shook her head. "No, I don't think it would do anything to his performance at work. It might affect him personally, but I don't think he'd ever let it show here. Not that it isn't painfully obvious, even to you."

"Yeah, it's not like…hey, say what?" Jean asked incredulously.

Riza shook her head, ignoring Jean's indignant protests. "I don't think that it will get so bad that he won't be able to work. Still, it will affect him physically, which might affect his performance here…" She stood up straight and marched into Roy's office, leaving Jean stunned as to what she was up to.

Roy barely lifted his head as Lt. Hawkeye strode into his office, but his eyes quickly snapped up as her palms came down upon his desk as an alchemist's might upon a transmutation circle.

"Is there…something I can help you with, Lieutenant?" he asked uncertainly, taken aback by Riza's uncharacteristic behavior.

"Sir!" she clipped, quickly straightening to salute him. "I think it would be in your best interest to take the afternoon off."

Roy smiled slightly before becoming somewhat offended. Riza rarely suggested that he take time off, unless…

Unless she suspected there was something wrong with him.

Which there usually was, and he usually graciously took her suggestion, but there was nothing wrong with him now! In fact, he'd never been more busy in his entire career. He was getting paperwork done at a breakneck pace. He figured that she'd be _happy_ that he'd been so productive.

"And what makes you think I _need_ it, Lieutenant?" he asked, his voice lined with venom. To those who did not know him, it might have sounded intimidating, but to Riza and Jean, who both knew him almost more than he knew himself, it sounded more like a pouting little boy with a temper.

Riza couldn't help but almost smile. She was beginning to see many ways in which Edward and Roy were very much alike. It was very amusing, now that she recognized it. She imagined that Edward probably wasn't very amused when someone suggested that he couldn't do his job.

Sure, under normal circumstances, Roy was very civil, but these weren't normal circumstances. His heart was involved and even though his heart was also involved in his pursuit to establish better standing so he could make a difference in the world, it just wasn't the same. Even if he denied it, when it came to Edward Elric, Riza knew…

Roy loved him. He loved him in a way that most would call scandalous, considering age, gender, and military standing. Yet, though he loved Ed in a way Riza had often wished he'd love her, she could find no fault with him. Perhaps it was bias, but there was something about the prospect of seeing Roy happy that she couldn't help but find appealing. Even though it didn't include her, she was willing to do what she had to in order to push him to the top, regardless of what he wanted to get to the top of.

She shook the strangely perverse thoughts that followed and took a deep breath, ready for the coming argument she knew was waiting her.

"Go home, sir. Trust me."

Roy opened his mouth to protest, but Riza cut him off.

"_Roy Mustang, have I ever told you to do anything that has caused you harm?!"_

Roy blinked, uncertain if he was hearing right. Was Riza actually _lecturing_ him? It seemed almost impossible, but yet, there she was, flush faced, hair askew, totally riled up and ready to tell him off at any given moment. It seemed ridiculous, but after knowing Riza as long as he had, he knew that when she was serious, she was _serious_.

He sighed heavily, feeling the automatic relief one feels after stretching the lungs a bit. Still, he wasn't about to go down looking like some pathetic loser who couldn't even control his own subordinates. "No, I suppose not. However, if anything happens, you call and let me know immediately."

"Don't worry. We can handle ourselves here. Just go home," Riza said strictly, pointing towards the door.

He nodded feebly, feeling very much defeated. After grabbing his coat and keys, he left for home. He couldn't help but worry. Things had a habit of happening when he wasn't around, and he knew that there was a history of things happening and not getting back to him. For some reason, people felt the need to not say anything to him, for fear that he might actually do something irresponsible, especially when it came to matters concerning the Elrics.

As if he'd just sit around, while something was happening to Edward and Alphonse. He'd taken charge of protecting those two long ago, and he'd be damned if anyone told him he couldn't do his job. He turned and started to make his way back to work, but then he stopped in his tracks as yawned, and realized that Riza was right, in a way. He was useless to anyone unless he was rested and at his full potential. Maybe an afternoon nap wouldn't hurt, but only for a few hours, then it was right back to work. He just didn't feel right, sleeping while the boys were out, possibly getting themselves into trouble.

He turned and started back for home. He felt fatigue fully hit him as he reached his front door. Feeling very glad he took Riza's advice, he stretched out over his sofa and slowly began to drift off.

The nagging feeling that he should be at work in case something happened began to attack again, but he shoved it aside as he succumbed to his urge to sleep.

**Stands under massive foreshadow**

**It's dark in here. Oo**


	20. Old Habits: Still Dying

-1**A/N: I knowwwww…I am phail when it comes to updating in a timely fashion. I'm also slacking on the wonderousness that is the manshmex, but honestly, I'm just trying to thicken the plot before I shove it off the cliff of no return. XD But yeah, there will be a few short chapters before I take it to the edge, and then one big bang before I shove it off the cliff entirely, where you all may then devour it. Yes, I actually am nearly finished with this story, yet most of the chapters are half-complete. Must work on that…**

**Super great thanks to: Amber-Brooke (I often forget where I'm at when writing myself. It happens. lol), Mocodity (welcome to the fandom, may your sanity rest in peace. XDDD), Iseult of the Snows (thanks for the massive comments, totally loved the love. ), tapole910 (awww thanks…and SHHHH! Haha…;), Krystal T.M. (busy busy! I mean, I get crazy busy, but it sounds like you have me topped), ThexYaoixNinja (Thanks for being so patient…I promise you'll get what you want soon), zst4ever (thanks a bunch. YEAH, we ALL know that Riza's a total closet perv, whether she'll admit it or not), Sophie (yeah, I'm not a terribly big Riza fan myself, but she's good when it comes to needing a certain tone to a story), The Lady Morana (Haha right! Remember, deny deny deny!), mieko8804 (mwahahahaha!!!), Kikiko (I shall grab an umbrella and we shall stand under it to save us from the shadow!), Visual Confectionary (I effing love you. Period. Viiiiiic loves you. XDDD), Paon (Ohhh me? Do anything to Ed or Al? NEVER.), Hubert111(I swear, my muse did it, not me. XD), Dark Mage Makai (Ahaha it IS a dark, ominous cloud! Also, Miroku is a silly little lecherous monk. Just always have to say that.), and GreedxEd (So glad to see that you found me on myspace! Of course, that now means that you have access to a messaging system I check more often than my blood pressure, so you can nag me if I'm taking too long…XD).**

**So, now that my A/N is potentially longer than my chapter, I s'pose I'll go do something worth doing…like…uh…**

**Yeah, I'm going to go write. XD**

It was amazing, how quickly Edward began to empathize with Roy Mustang after having been on assignment for three weeks. He'd done more paperwork than he'd cared for, and on top of that, there were reconstruction issues to be dealt with as well. It was such a mess, what was left of the East. Other than the incident with Eckhart, there had been several attacks from enemy forces since then, and they had quickly laid waste to areas like the old coal mining town of Youswell. It was tragic, Ed thought, as he remembered the short time he and Al had spent there after having first become a state alchemist. He had been proud of the work he'd done there, yet it seemed almost for naught as he had witnessed that which was left of the old place.

He couldn't help but think of Halling and his family, which quickly led him to think of his own family. Risembool was similar to the small town that once was Youswell, and it was sad that something could happen to his lovely little hometown that was too peaceful to seem as if it belonged with the rest of the world.

He knew that Al was thinking the same thing, and probably worrying about Winry as well. Ed knew that Winry could hold her own, but still, that didn't keep him from worrying a little. He groaned in relief as he finished the last of a long line of documents. He'd had to review and approve several plans to build shelters on the outskirts of several ruined settlements. He was glad to think that he had an important part in overseeing some of these developments, but part of him just wanted to go home and settle the unfinished business with Roy. He was anxious to ask him what he'd wanted to say the day they'd left. He was certain that Roy wanted to say something about how he'd feel if something happened to him. He hoped that the man would at least care a little. After all, they had known one another for a long time, and though they weren't exactly what one would call friends, they were both soldiers, dogs of the military, and they shared mutual frustration and boredom about such, so there should be some sort of sentiment between them, though it wasn't exactly the sentiment he desired.

Then again, he still wasn't certain of the kind of sentiment he really wanted. So what if Roy liked him, and he liked Roy? So what? That didn't mean that anything would actually _happen_. It was highly unlikely that Roy Mustang felt strongly enough for him that he would begin some kind of _relationship _with him. That was almost absurd to think of.

Still…it wasn't like he didn't hope for such impossible things. He really did want to get closer to Roy, if only to become friends and nothing more.

_Only friends…_

As sad as that thought made him, he knew that it was what he'd settle for, if he had to. He shook the sleep from his mind and made ready to leave for the day. It was late, and he was certain that Alphonse had long since finished his tasks and gone back to camp. He smiled at the realization of just how content Al had become after they arrived. He knew that his brother was happiest when they were helping people.

The sad realization hit him as he began to understand just what this thing with Roy might mean. If the impossible chance that Roy wanted something with him was indeed not as impossible as he thought, that might mean the separation of the two brothers at last. Sure, they'd been separated by worlds for a few years, but all the same, it wasn't like either of them thought it was the final goodbye for them. They both knew they'd find a way to get back to one another.

Yes, it was true that Edward's final decision to stay with the military didn't mean that they would never see one another again. It was far from the end for them, but it did mean the end of their journeys together as a pair. Alphonse would probably resign from the military, or at least ask to be allowed to get out to Risembool more often to see Winry. No doubt he would settle there, as their father had, only leaving occasionally for work matters. And it was no doubt that unlike their father, Alphonse would stay there for the rest of his life.

Yet there was more in store in life for Ed than what awaited him in that tiny town. He couldn't let his talent be wasted in that small place, slowly aging into disrepair. He had to stay with the military; it was the only way he could make something of himself. Besides, it was all he knew. He'd always thought of leaving someday, but he'd never really considered what he could actually do. Now that everything was getting back to normal, he had nothing to work towards. Sure, there would always be something new to learn about alchemy, but that wouldn't satisfy him forever. No, he had to create a place in the world for himself. He really wanted to be with Roy, but if that wasn't meant to be, well then…

Wait, had he actually used the phrase "meant to be"? As if he was about to leave something as important as his relationship of Roy up to fate? He must've lost some brain cells in exchange for the energy to plow through the paperwork.

He snorted. Even when he was joking, equivalent exchange seemed to poke it's ugly head out. So what was he to give up, in exchange for his relationship with Roy? Was it just the effort required to establish the bonds necessary? The inevitable stress of putting up with him? Or was it…the end of his time with his brother?

He sighed sadly. As much as he loved Alphonse, he knew they wouldn't always be together as they were now. Still, he wasn't sure he could deal with being separated again so soon.

Shaking his head, he began to gather his things. He was starting to sound like a sad little boy who didn't want to be parted from his favorite toy. It was time to grow up, after all. They'd had a good run, now it was time to let go.

"Time…to let go…" he said softly, looking over the room once more before closing the door and locking it behind him.

**Yep. Still dark. Oo**


	21. Brother, Like Brother

**A/N: Okay, so I lied. Well, didn't LIE, per say, I just got busier than I had originally anticipated. Such as this is, I shall keep this brief, and let you all go on to your reading. Again, nothing exciting this time, since I have yet to get out of this huge shadow, but I'm hoping to get posted again before the end of the week, which should shrink the shadow a bit.**

**Ah, but this reminds me! A question was posted to me originally, but after much thought (and having come up with nothing I liked at all) I have decided that I should let you all determine this, since you've all been such a great audience. The question was: since Al is a state alchemist, what is his title? Well, that stumps me. Therefore, I will take any suggestions you may have and I'll pick the best one by the end of the week. ANDDDD in addition, the winner not only gets an awesome little blurb in my A/N for the next chapter, they also get the wondrous job of being my fun-fun advisor, helping me whenever I have little issues with plot and whatnot (after all, it's not really so much that I need a grammar beta so much as someone to help me keep things in check for the sequel. I know, that makes no sense, but you shall see.)**

**Anyway, super great thanks goes to: Spirix, mieko8804, Dark Mage Makai, GreedxEd, Sophie, The Lady Morana, Paon (and poser of the question), Nuitari Aquarius, Shadewolf 7, Krystal TM, and The Sayjin Kira.**

**Now readreadread. **

Alphonse sat at the table inside of the tent he and his brother had shared since their arrival a few weeks before. He glanced from the cold dinner before him to the clock sitting nearby. It was starting to get rather late, and Edward had yet to return from work. He'd finished ages ago, so he decided to get dinner ready for when Ed returned. That had been a few hours ago, far later than the elder Elric was usually out and about.

This was something of concern to Al. Ed was many things, but late was not one of them. Then again, he was known to be quite the hard worker, especially when doing something he was passionate about. Maybe he'd started a project he was anxious to finish.

_Yes, there were many reasons Ed could be late,_ Alphonse reasoned. _No need to worry. Brother is an adult now, right? He can handle himself._

Couldn't he?

His silent inquiry went unanswered as the tension of his brother's absence began to envelope him. To help pass time, he took out his silver pocket watch and began to fiddle with it, hoping it would distract him, if only for a short time.

Suddenly, he became aware of sounds coming from outside the tent. It couldn't possibly be Edward, since he usually made his presence known before reaching the tent, and it was far too late for any visitors. In fact, it was usually quiet around this time of night. Alerted by this, Alphonse stood, poised and ready to attack, his arms tense as they readied to throw his hands together to create whatever alchemic reaction was necessary to deal with the intruder.

Still, there was no need to attack unless it was absolutely necessary. It would be best if he gave some kind of warning first, lest he attack some harmless individual simply passing by.

"Who's there?" he asked, trying to keep his voice from trembling. He honestly didn't know how his brother did it, constantly running headfirst into dangerous situations all the time. _He_ certainly wouldn't have done half the things he had in his life, had it not been for his brother's constant dragging him into those kinds of things.

He could swear his soul almost jumped into another inanimate object when a voice suddenly rang out, breaking the silence.

"Major Elric! Major Elric, sir! I need to speak with you; it's very urgent!"

It didn't seem like a voice Al recognized, though he didn't suspect that anyone wanting to cause him harm would address him in such a manner, so he threw the tent flap aside, stepping out into the open. A uniformed soldier stood out before him, quickly saluting him as soon as he appeared. The young man hardly looked to be older than he was, but he said nothing of it. After all, his own brother was merely a child when he joined the military, so who was he to judge?

And yet, the soldier looked so tired and worn-out, Al couldn't help but feel a pang of sympathy for the poor, misguided soul. He groaned to himself. Ed was right; he really was too nice sometimes. It was almost humorous, though, how much Al was reminded of Lieutenant Hawkeye when he looked at the soldier.

"At ease," Al said softly, wondering what it was that had brought the young man to him. "What's the matter?"

The young soldier's face seemed to change color from bright red to a pale ashen color in a matter of moments. Al felt his heart sink; he knew that expression, and it never meant a good thing.

"Please forgive me my intrusion at such a late hour, sir, but I have bad news…about Major Edward Elric."

Alphonse felt as if his stomach had dropped through the soles of his shoes. Edward. Something had happened to Edward. He should have known. As much as he didn't want to, he forced himself to urge the young soldier to continue.

"Yes?" he asked, voice strained. He felt as if something was blocking his airway, but he couldn't seem to clear his throat enough to breathe right. Instead, he felt as if the world was yanking its giant rug out from under his feet.

Automatically seeing that something was wrong, the soldier's expression turned to one of concern, as he reached out to steady Alphonse.

"Perhaps you should sit down, sir…before I tell you what's happened. You don't look so well."

Al felt anger slowly rise from within. Something had happened to his brother, and this man was telling him to sit down? No, he had to know!

"Just tell me!" he said harshly, sounding far angrier than he felt. It wasn't in his nature to be an angry person, but when it came to his brother, he didn't care who received the brunt of his frustration.

The soldier's face fell. It was obvious he was not yet accustomed to such treatment. As badly as Al felt about it, he felt that knowing what had happened to Ed was more important.

_Besides, it's best he get used to this kind of treatment now. If he thinks everyone's nice in the military, he's sadly mistaken._

Al was shocked at how cynical he was sounding. Since when did he start to think like Ed?

Ed. He had to know what had happened to Ed. The soldier still looked alarmed, so Alphonse decided to try a different approach.

"Please, tell me what's happened," he pleaded softly.

The young man nodded. "My apologies, sir. Major Elric, your brother…he's…"

As the rest of the words left his mouth, everything seemed to blur for Al. He wasn't sure which way was up, and which way was down. He couldn't even feel his own feet. It was as if he was in the armor again, unable to feel, unable to identify anything within himself that was human…

All that was left was the _pain_, that gnawing, aching pain that resonated within him. He could only feel the pain he felt the night Envy had killed his brother, when he looked at his brother's lifeless body and knew the truth…

_No, Ed…Edward…he can't…he just can't be…no…brother…_

"Major Elric!" the soldier shouted, his voice seeming an entire world away, as if it was little more than an echo in Al's mind. "Alphonse!"

Al felt the world spin as his feet seemed to leave the ground, his body hitting the grass hard as he fainted, his mind slowly succumbing to the darkness of unconsciousness.

_Brother…please…_


	22. Blowing Veins and Catching Trains

**A/N: And welcome to the latest installment of ALTMUF! After much thought, I have decided on the winner of the "name that **_**Al**_**chemist" contest! (Yes, I know, I'm a clever one…) And… (Drum roll, please.) Dark Mage Makai!!! For some odd reason, "Steel Soul Alchemist" sounded so nifty, I could hardly resist. Thank you to all who participated; each of your ideas was superbly creative, making this decision incredibly difficult. So, as promised, I shall use your wonderful idea in ALTMUF, as well as the future sequel, which you will be briefed on, especially when I run out of ideas (which happens more often than one might think.)**

**As a side note, after this chapter, if you wish, you may opt to read my ficlet entitled "In the Rain," which was actually going to be my original ending, but after looking over it (and having had a better day the day after I wrote that), I decided to revise, which led to the awesome chance for a sequel. So yeah, download Imogen Heap's "Hide and Seek" and read that after this chapter. Then, sit down and remind yourself that that's not the ending! You'll be glad you did.**

**A great deal of thanks goes to the super loyal readers who continue to comment, even though I don't always pump out the best chapters. The number of comments I receive continues to decline, but that's okay, just as long as people continue to read. It lets me know I'm doing something right. Anyway, my ramblings are done. Enjoy.**

Roy woke to the sound of his phone ringing. He groaned, stretching his body and considering just letting the phone ring. By the time he'd finally agreed to this idea, his phone had rang thirteen times. It was starting to unnerve him.

"God, who could possibly want to speak to me at this hour?" he hissed.

As he woke more fully, it suddenly hit him. _Riza! _Only she would hold on for this long. Something must have happened!

Quickly, he rolled off his sofa and walked over to the black phone that sat on a nearby side table. He picked it up and nearly _slammed_ it to his ear.

"Mustang," he answered simply--no need to drag anything out.

"Sir!" Riza chirped from the other line.

"Yes, Lieutenant?" Roy asked, feeling almost impatient that he didn't know what was going on as soon as he touched the phone. "I'm sure you have a good reason for calling me at this hour."

"Yes, sir. I assured you I would call if anything came up," she said.

"And?" Roy asked irritably. "What. Havoc need another date? Another 'ghost' problem? Chicken bones in the guise of human remains? Or perhaps _you_ want me to take in a cat, now."

"Sir, now is not the time for joking!"

Roy paused, taken aback. Not only was he surprised at how oddly forward she'd gotten as of late, but also, there was something…something not quite right. Something in her voice bothered him. Had it been the slight strain, the little crack in her tone? Whatever it was, it indicated that something was just not right.

"What is it, Riza?" he asked softly, using a tone of informality rarely heard between the two. If Riza Hawkeye was close to tears, something horrible had to have happened.

Meanwhile, on the other end of the phone, Riza was trying desperately to hold back the tears. She could almost see Roy's face and how it would look after she told him the news. It was enough to break her heart. Still, he had to know. She owed that to him, as his subordinate and his friend.

"We received news that an officer was shot and wounded near Eastern Headquarters earlier this evening," Riza said calmly.

"Oh," Roy said simply, as if this was of little consequence to him. "Well, I imagine that they can probably handle it, though I appreciate the call…"

Riza blinked back tears. The fact that Roy was still completely oblivious was painful. How could he not understand? How long had he known her? Since when had she called him in the middle of the night to tell him of some random shooting unless it pertained to something that concerned him?

"Roy…it's Edward," she said quietly, feeling her throat tighten with each syllable. She waited patiently for a response, but none came. Finally, after a few moments, a voice broke through. It was strained, almost to the point where it was inaudible, but she heard it, regardless.

"I see…"

Riza swallowed nervously, already feeling the strain of trying to hold tears back. "Yes, earlier this evening, we received confirmation that it was Major Elric who was the officer wounded. It appears that he was walking back to camp from his work station when he was attacked by an alchemist who was said to have an agenda against the state and the alchemists who serve under it."

"I…see…" Roy repeated, still too stunned to really grasp what had happened.

"I just…thought you should know," Riza said firmly, trying to convince herself that telling Roy what had happened was the right thing to do.

"When is he due back?" Roy asked.

"He isn't," Riza replied. Before any protests could be made, she continued on. "He's too unstable at this point in time. We have little information on the specifics of his condition, but we're hoping to obtain more information within the hour." Feeling both the strong urge to cry and an odd sense of panic well up, Riza pushed them aside and did what she knew she needed to do in order to keep Roy safe.

"Sir, I discourage you from doing anything that might affect you professionally--"

"Don't worry, Lieutenant, I won't do anything that might shed a revealing light upon myself," he said placidly, still feeling numb. "I am an adult; I can contain myself."

Riza let a small smile slip past her lips, sighing softly. "I suppose you're right."

"Of course I am. I thank you for the call, but I really would like to get back to bed and sleep on this. Let me know if there are any updates on Ed's condition," Roy said, his voice strangely uplifted. It was disconcerting to Riza, who knew him better.

"Sir, I think perhaps--" she started slowly.

"Thank you again, Lieutenant," Roy interrupted, cutting her off.

"Roy…"

Roy hung up the phone. Sighing, he knew what it was he had to do. He also knew what he was going to do, and that those two things were quite different. He went to his room and began to pack.

He had a train to catch.


	23. No Title, Too Stupid

-1**A/N: Okay, so I am currently having a case of omglmaoitis right now. I just realized that I somehow managed to screw up and get my two chapters mixed around. Ah well…this fits, regardless. This is more of an insight of what happened to Edo and so on…Man, I feel foolish. Ah well.**

**Great thanks to all my great reviewers. I'd type you all out by name, but I'm anxious to post this and get the inner voice to stop telling me what a doofus I am. Wow…must be the college exams getting to me…y'all understand, right? Right?!**

Edward was walking home, feeling very content with the day's accomplishments. He had gotten much done in the long hours he'd worked. He'd managed to get three-fourths of the blueprints reviewed thus far, and with one-fourth to go, it wouldn't be long before construction would begin. It was highly difficult to say just how long it would take before the area began to resemble a place worth inhabiting again, but who was to say? If he worked hard enough, perhaps they would be rewarded.

_Still with the equivalent exchange…even after knowing better…perhaps he was just too optimistic, after all…or foolish…_

He laughed at himself, shaking his head. He really was starting to lose his mind. He was surprised that it took him that long to do it. It seemed as though he almost had to work for it. No doubt he'd have to work for everything in his life.

He smiled as he thought of all the ways that he would work at earning Roy's attention. Surely working hard and not having done anything truly retrograding thus far would serve as a way to help gain favor. After all, those were a few of the things Roy had always disliked about him. It was certain that there was no way that he could possibly prevent bad things from happening all the time, but he could try hard to make sure that things went as well as possible. Being a help rather than a hindrance might work to his advantage.

As Ed walked along, completely lost in his own thoughts, he was unaware of that which was going on around him. Therefore, it was no surprise when he lost his footing and fell over, skinning his flesh hand on a nearby tree as he did so.

"Ah!" he cried out, hissing as red marks began to appear where he had wounded his knuckles. "Way to go, Ed. Such a klutz, no matter what you do…"

Suddenly, he heard movement nearby. He was quick to his feet, looking around for any signs of movement. Holding his stinging hand, after seeing nothing of surrounding life, he went back to making his way home. He felt the nagging fatigue gnawing at him once again, feeling as if he could possibly just lie down and sleep where he was.

"So tired…why do I keep doing this to myself?" he asked aloud, almost reprimanding himself. He smirked as Alfons Heiderich's voice sounded inside his head.

_Oh Edward, I don't understand what you hope to accomplish on an empty stomach and a clouded mind. Why don't you get something to eat and sleep a little? Maybe that'll help you work better._

"Alfons…why didn't I ever listen to you? You always seemed to know better than me," Ed said fondly, remembering his friend's way of trying to almost parent him, though he was older.

_Just like Al,_ he realized. Maybe it really was time for them to part, after all. He would be selfish to think that Alphonse needed him as he felt he needed Alphonse. Maybe Al would be better off doing what he wanted for once. It really was he who had constantly gotten them into trouble. Yes, he really was a burden to his younger sibling--one that Al, perhaps, was just better off without.

As he walked along, feeling both pity for himself and guilt for all the trouble he'd caused his brother, he was again oblivious to the fact that he was being followed. Had he been of clear mind, he would have seen it easily. However, he was too caught up in his own fatigue and sadness to think that he could be in any danger. He and Alphonse had been warned as to the slight instability of the region, which was yet another reason for their coming. Reconstruction wasn't as important as having the security of two well-known state alchemists, after all.

_That's pretty pathetic, _Edward had said. _Maybe if you'd been more honest from the get-go, you might have been better assisted. Don't know what my brother and I can do to help, other than do the job we were assigned and try and offer some aid if something is to happen. Don't expect us to risk our necks or anything. We have no reason to do that._

If only he'd known what they'd gotten themselves into…

The abrupt rustle of leaves suddenly caught Ed's attention, causing him to whip around, alarmed. There was definitely someone there. The thought someone had been following him irritated him. He'd learned that whenever he was being tailed, that person was either assigned to watch over him, which he certainly didn't need, or…

They wanted trouble.

"Who's there? What do you want?" he shouted, trying to see where the person might be hiding. He only felt slight apprehension, having been in this situation many times before, but that didn't keep him from worrying just a little that this might be something he couldn't handle…not that he'd ever admit that.

"I know you're there. Answer me!" he shouted again, feeling his irritation build. Whoever it was, they were doing both a terrible and superb job at keeping their location disclosed. It was actually starting to freak him out a little. He was mildly aware that something bad was about to go down, and he was almost certain that it wouldn't bode well for him. It never usually did.

"Show yourself!" he barked, whipping out his new silver pocketwatch the state had issued him. "I'm a certified state alchemist. I'm authorized to use force if necessary. Come out now, and I won't hurt you."

Reacting to the sound of movement behind him, Ed whipped around, prepared to attack if he had to. When he turned, however, he saw that no one was there. The same sound came again, only this time to the right. He turned towards the sound, only to bear the same results. This continued in a circular motion around him, until he could swear that there was more than one assailant. He couldn't be for sure, though. However, one thing was certain…

He was getting dizzy from all the turning, and it was starting to go to his head. He swayed, reaching out for whatever there was to try and steady himself. Things seemed to blur, however, making it difficult to really see anything.

_This is no ordinary dizzy spell,_ he thought. _It's…alchemy! Must get down, must fight, must clap…must form the circle…must…clap…_

He raised his arms to form the circle that would activate his alchemy, but it came too late. Something was happening to him…something he couldn't avoid…

"Death to the state! Death to the alchemist dogs!" screamed a voice from beyond Ed's path of vision.

Suddenly, everything appeared to become quiet as the grave. The air felt heavy, as if gravity was working at double capacity. Time, it seemed, was suspended. This awkward reverie was shattered as the ring of a bullet leaving the barrel of a gun rang through the air. Ed could not see where it was coming from, but it became obvious that the assailant was somewhere hidden before him, because the sharp pain followed as the bullet struck him in the chest.

He tried to cry out, to do something to make his presence known to anyone who might be coming in search of the origin of the shot, but nothing came. He could only gasp and wheeze as fluid began to fill his lungs.

"So you are the legendary Edward Elric…" a voice seemed to sound above him. He turned slightly, but could only make out the blurred shape of a man.

"You are the one who can perform alchemy without a circle…but I know your trick. I know of the secret to your alchemy…" The man kneeled near Ed, hovering just above his ear. "It's that _arm_ of yours. It enhances your power and allows you to perform without a circle. Well, we'll have to fix that, won't we?"

The man grabbed onto Ed's automail limb and pressed his heel against Ed's shoulder. "Yes, let's fix this…abomination…shall we?" He stepped down hard, pulling Ed's wrist until he could feel the limb begin to separate from the rest of his body. The ports seemed to scream in agony as metal was torn, electrical sparks emitting from the split wires. There was a glow as an alchemic reaction reduced his arm to little more than small parts. He did it slowly, deriving a sort of sick pleasure from watching the dismantling of something so important.

_My arm…my arm…God, he's going to take apart my arm… I can't stop him. Can't…even…breathe…_

_My God, I'm going to die here._

As those thoughts flitted across his mind, he could only think of the people he loved so dearly. His brother…whom he had shared so much with…what would he do with Edward finally gone? What would he become? It saddened Ed to think that his little brother would grow up without him.

And Roy…Roy, who he hadn't even gotten to tell anything to yet…what would he say? Probably not much, not that Ed really minded, just so long as he was missed.

Roy would miss him, right? He had to. Right?

The thought was interrupted as the man's voice broke through, his tone menacing and cruel.

"And just as an added insurance policy, I think I'll just make sure you don't go drawing any circles on me."

Ed tried not to scream as the man brought his heel down hard on Ed's already-wounded flesh hand. He was almost certain that every finger was broken in at least two places. He really was going to die… No, he wouldn't think about the pain. He would think of other things, nice things, things to get him by until he either died, or someone saved him.

_No one is going to save you. Just get that through your head right now._

A searing pain shot through Ed's temples, causing him to bend almost outward as he grunted, trying to swallow the blood beginning to accumulate in his throat.

_God, can't breathe…can't…breathe…_

The man assaulting him, however, could breathe, though it was apparent by his heavy breathing that he wouldn't last much longer. Maybe he would offer up a nice mercy shot for Ed. To be shot executioner style wouldn't be so bad. Besides, it's not as if Ed didn't know what was awaiting him on the other side.

_Alfons…I'll see Alfons again, won't I? And Hughes…Nina…maybe even the homunculi, human again…Wrath…Teacher…Dad…_

Though he knew who he desperately wanted to see the most, he dared not to think it. After all, he was probably going to Hell, anyway…if there was such a thing.

"Ugh, you're a stubborn little bastard, aren't you? Fullmetal…heh, it fits. It's a pity things ended this way for you, kid. Ah well, can't be helped now, can it?" the man said softly.

"But…w-why…?" Ed managed as he coughed and spat out more blood then he could ever remember seeing in his life.

The man sighed. "Because, I can't stand watching these alchemists submit themselves to the pitiful thing we call a state. I am going to show the world that alchemists are more than state attack dogs…I am going to clear the name of the noble alchemist and deterge the world of people like _you_."

Just as the man raised his gun to Ed's temple, pressing it in hard to the point where Ed could practically feel it behind his eyes. He squeezed his eyes shut tight, a chant running through his mind, almost like praying, though to what god, he didn't know.

_Just let this be over soon…please, let this be over quickly…oh Alphonse…I'm sorry…_


	24. Some Never Learn

-1**A/N: Now that I think about it…yes, the switching of chapters does far better than my original plan. Yay for accidental brilliance! XD But yes, thanks for all the reviews thus far. If you're just joining now, welcome! I hope I've pleased you all thus far. I decided to get to truckin' on this one, otherwise Misa-chan will eat me. OO Not gewd.**

**Many MANY thanks to: gggggggggggggg (no, not a typo, I just type 'em like I see 'em), Sophie (always good to hear from you, m'dear), horsepoet (cool name. And yes, pobre Edo. I promise to be nicer in the future…mebbeh) , The Lady Morana (yes, a good pounding would be nice, wouldn't it? Ah well, the evils of plot devices. Hope you're pleased with the next couple chapters), Bar-Ohki (I know, I'm a doofus LOL), Paon (Be patient, my friend, all will clear by the end…I didn't mean for that to rhyme. It's the poet in me), Dark Mage Makai (Thankies thankies. Always appreciate kind words from loyal readers, yes…), and GreedxEd (There. I posted. Quitcherbuggin. Please don't hurt me).**

**And soooo…yes. Good news: postage. Bad news: kinda bo-rang in comparison to other chapters, but I promise the next one will be a winner.**

As Roy sat on the train heading out east, he thought sadly of Riza, and the kind of scrutiny she was going to have to undergo in his absence, but he couldn't help that now. He had to do whatever was necessary to make sure nothing happened to Edward. He didn't know what he would do if something fatal happened to the young man.

But something _had _happened to him. He'd been shot, by someone who had it out for people like Roy, not people like Edward. No, people like Edward didn't get shot, because they didn't deserve it.

As much as Roy wanted to believe this naiveté, he knew the reality of it all. Ed was in trouble, probably fighting for his life, and there was nothing Roy could do to help him.

No, this couldn't be; he couldn't stand to lose yet another person close to him, not in this way. He'd lost Maes like this. Oh, how he'd despaired at the loss of his best friend. This was going to be far worse, he knew. He loved Edward in a way he could never have loved Maes. Yes, the man had been close to him--his one true friend in the world, but still…

This was Edward. Edward, whom he loved. Edward, who just a few weeks before, had stood before Roy, clad in uniform, ready to do what it took to make something of himself.

And Roy had just let him go, as if he was so certain he would see him again. How foolish he'd been.

_Ed, please…hang on…so much I have to tell you…so much you must know…_

It was making him restless, the waiting. It seemed as if the train was moving at a pace even a sloth wouldn't envy. Nothing was going fast enough for him. He had to get there, had to see Edward, had to let him know that what had happened between them _did_ mean something to him. It meant the _world_ to him. _Edward_ was the world to him.

And his world was crumbling.

After what seemed like an eternity, the train finally came to a stop. It took everything Roy had not to whip out his gloves and set fire to everyone who got in his way. He wanted nothing more than to get to Ed, if only to be able to sit by his side, to be there for him in his time of need…

"Colonel!" came a strangely familiar voice from behind him as he stepped off the train.

Slowly, Roy turned around to face none other than Riza Hawkeye herself.

"Lieutenant?" he asked, cocking an eyebrow in surprise. "What are you doing here?"

Riza shook her head sadly at his lack of understanding. "Sir, since when have I let you go out, risking life, limb, and career without me? Someone has to be here to keep an eye on you, after all." She smiled slightly.

Roy smiled a little, nodding firmly. Part of him was glad that she was there because it made his absence seem less suspicious (or more, depending on whom you talked to…), and part of him was glad she was there because he knew that he would need her. He couldn't do this alone. He wasn't sure he had the strength to do it.

"Yes, I suppose you do," he agreed softly, looking out the window again.

Riza sat beside him silently, as if this was just another mission. Yes, she was risking quite a bit as well, but it was Roy, so there was nothing that could be done. Though she wasn't the one he wanted…though she wasn't the one he was risking it all and jumping on a train to travel across the country to see…she just couldn't say no.

A long and heavy silence fell between them. Riza wanted to say something, something meaningful that would help ease the tension, but nothing came to mind. She was afraid that there wouldn't be anything she could say to make it easier for him. After all, what could one person say to another when they were under as much stress as Roy was?

She let out a small sigh, hoping that it would go unnoticed. To her relief, Roy seemed to be oblivious to his surroundings.

_Too busy thinking of Edward, no doubt, _she thought. As much as she tried not to sound bitter, even to herself, she knew she could not lie. She loved him, but she would never have him. Though she knew that in her mind, she also could not help but hope that someday, he might realize what he had in her, and would come around.

However, with Ed now in Roy's sights, there was definitely no way that was ever going to happen. Not anytime soon, anyway. It wasn't that Riza didn't think she had more to offer than Edward did; no, it wasn't that at all. She just didn't have what he needed. She knew him better than anyone else, no doubt, but that wasn't what he needed. Sure, he needed someone to understand him, but not in the way she did. Edward understood him in a way no one else seemed to. True, they were usually at each other's necks, and the young alchemist's assumptions about his superior were almost always wrong, but that was beside the point. The point was that in the end, the blonde always seemed to get something out of the colonel that no one else could. It was…that look. That look that Riza had always dreamed he'd give her. That look…no, she wouldn't think about it. If she did, it might lead her to say something inappropriate…

But still, she had just as much a right to his attention as Ed did, damnit! She had been by his side the whole time, only for him to find affection for someone who he could never be with and still keep his goals and integrity intact.

Maybe that was it. Maybe she just wasn't forbidden enough for him. Maybe she was too obtainable, too available, and the chase wasn't enough for him. Yes, that had to be it. With her, he would always be safe and know that someone was there for him. With this infatuation of his, the abomination that it was, he would never really reach his goal. He would always be chasing after something he could never have. He had to have something to pursue, since that which he had strived to attain was no longer an option. After all, it was silly to try and fill a position that no longer existed, wasn't it?

_Quit rationalizing,_ her voice of reason told her. _You know none of that is true. Roy's not like that. He's never been one to senselessly go after things like that. Each of his moves are carefully calculated, even when he's being a complete fool._

"Sir, I think…" she began slowly.

"Can we just sit in peace, Riza?" Roy asked quietly, in such a way that she almost lost her breath. She had never heard him speak this way. It was almost as if he was…afraid…

One look at him as he faced her, his eyes holding a deep secret that no one seemed to know, but one she could read clearly. He was hurting. Somewhere deep inside, he was screaming and there was no one there to hear him. Though she couldn't hear him herself, she could feel it down to her bones. She hadn't seen him this distraught since Hughes had died, and even then…

_Oh God, _she realized. _He loves him. He really loves him. I never thought it to be possible…entertained the notion perhaps, but never really…_

Though inside, her chest was tightening and fear was beginning to set in at the idea that this infatuation might be more than she realized. She could feel her heart pounding hard in his chest, and she struggled for the words she knew she had to say. Though it was all right to say it was okay for them to sit in quiet, it wasn't the question Roy had really asked. He was really asking for her to be all right with what was happening. He was asking for her approval, and she had to give it. No, more than that, she had to really mean it. Just as she understood him better than anyone, it was the same as he to her. He would be able to tell in a heartbeat if she was lying, and that would make it more difficult for him to do what he had to do. He was going to do it regardless, but it would give him the strength he needed if she could just say yes. So many times…so many times she had been supporting him as he ran into danger, hoping he would come back to her, but this…this he would not be coming back from. With this, he would be forever out of her reach. Could she really do that?

She looked at him again, not able to deny the look of pleading that was in his eyes but not on his face. Leave it to those _eyes _to say everything about him that he couldn't.

She sighed and smiled a small smile, one she didn't entirely feel, but was willing to give anyway. After all, it was about his happiness, not hers. She could find contentedness in just about anything that pleased her. Roy…he would never find true happiness unless he was allowed to truly pursue that which he desired. It was something she could not deny him, even if it cost her.

"Of course, sir," she said kindly, opening a book and feigning interest in it. She was relieved to see that he went back to staring out the window. It was true, there was no way now that she could ever have him, not really, but still…

_Maybe someday,_ her naïve heart promised her. Though she knew it to be highly unlikely, she had to believe it.

"We're here," Roy said suddenly, cutting through her thoughts. She looked out the window to find that indeed, they had reached their destination. This was it, her last chance to persuade him that this wasn't what he wanted, that he had something better right in front of him.

_So then…it's now, or never…_

"Sir, I just wanted to say…" she began hesitantly.

"I just want to tell you how much I appreciate you coming along," Roy interrupted. "I…I'm glad to have a friend with me…because this is important to me."

Riza swallowed, unable to fully digest his words. He was being so outwardly emotional, even though it was hard for him. It wasn't as if she hadn't seen him in a vulnerable state before; time and time again, she had seen him in ways very few had. Still, she'd never seen him quite this…bare. It was like he was completely exposed, that hard outer shell ripped off so that the entire world could see him. It was not only odd; it was downright _tragic_.

Most women would have broken down into a bawl fest because he was being so open. Most men would have teased him about turning into such a girl. This was Riza, however, and Riza was tougher than most women and more sensitive than most men. Actually, Riza was tougher than most men…but that was neither here nor there. The important thing was that Riza knew Roy better than most, and so she knew exactly what to say.

"We should get going, sir. Who knows how long visitation hours are, if they even let us in at all."

Roy let slip a small smile and nodded. "Right."

Riza sighed as she watched Roy walk ahead to get off the train. Even though it was the right thing to do, she couldn't help but hate herself.

_I guess this means it wasn't meant to be,_ she thought sadly.

Roy turned, and she felt the annoyingly familiar flutter of butterflies she still got in her stomach when he looked at her. She should have felt privileged, since he had a special way of looking at her like he did Edward. Still, it wasn't the same. The look he gave her wasn't too different from the one he used to give Maes Hughes, when he was alive.

"Coming, Lieutenant?" he asked, bringing Riza back to attention.

She nodded. "Yes, sir. Sorry."

Roy gave her that small smile once more and continued to get off the train. She heaved a heavy sigh and followed.

_Ah well, if nothing else, at least he's happy. That's what matters._

She hoped.


	25. Not Exactly a Conjugal Visit, but

**A/N: I'm so sorry! I'd said I'd be on the ball this time and now it's been nearly a month since I've updated! And now finals are coming up and I'll probably slow down again…but hey! Christmas break is soon and then I'll be all over it! Promise! Also, I haven't just been sitting around on my hands. I have a few chapters written already for the sequel (if I can't think of something, I start on something else…geez…) as well as the beginning of a new, totally unrelated RoyEd story that I'm really excited about called "Cherry Blossoms." It's something I thought of while watching a movie. I can't wait to get really started on it. But first things first! This chapter's a longer one, so I hope that makes up for my tardiness.**

**Many many MANY thanks go to: Amsul, Krystal M. T., WhisperedDaydreams, pure.life, horsepoet, Mage of Dragons, anmbcuconnfan, mieko8804, The Lady Morana, Sophie, Pojo-san, Dark Mage Makai, Bar-Ohki, Paon, and the always wonderful and lovely GreedxEd. I really am glad to be able to say that every time I read my reviews, I can recognize most, if not all, of the names posted. I consider myself blessed to have such a wonderful group of readers who share the same passion (and dare I say, fanaticism?) for the lovely and undeniable grouping that is RoyEd. So here's the next chapter. I hope you're all as pleased as I was.**

_Roy slowly walked down the stark white corridor of the Eastern General Hospital Wing, or at least, that's what they were calling it these days. It still looked like the infirmary at Eastern HQ to him, but what did he know? His mind was scrambled. Maybe he was really just in the infirmary back home, after Riza had all but dragged him off the train. He didn't just want to see Ed, he needed to. He had so many things to say, so many things he hadn't done yet. Oh what he would do just to touch the young man one more time, to finally say what had been on his mind for the last few years._

_But what would he say? What could he say?_

"_Ed, I'm sorry?" No, that wouldn't work. What was he sorry about?_

"_Ed, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me…even though it really is your own damned fault for being such a magnet for trouble." No. That was too rough. He needed something softer, something that could be whispered in his ear…something only the two of them would have._

"_Ed, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you when you needed me. I'm sorry I was too stubborn to tell you how I felt. I'm sorry that it's taken me this long to figure it all out. I'm sorry that you got hurt, and I feel that it's all my fault because had I said something, you probably wouldn't have left. At least, I hope you wouldn't have left. Just don't leave now, not when I finally have the courage to say what's on my mind."_

_No, too soap opera. When did this get so hard?_

"_Keep it short, keep it simple," he muttered to himself._

"_Ed, I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me. I feel responsible for what happened somehow. Maybe if I'd been more honest with you, you wouldn't have been so quick to leave. Get better."_

_Yeah, that would work, even if it was somewhat unbelievable. Ed probably would have left anyway. Maybe. Who knew._

_Roy was torn from his thoughts by the bustle of people rushing into one of the nearby rooms. He vaguely wondered what all the trouble was, but he quickly brushed it aside._

"_Probably someone important," he thought dully._

_He paused and looked back at the room number everyone was rushing to. Room 103…why did that sound so familiar?_

_Wait, wasn't that Ed's room?! Roy turned and ran back to see doctors and nurses clamoring around Ed's pale body, which remained still as they tried to pump it back to life._

_Roy's heart began ramming in his chest. Ed…dying? Not conceivable. Not in the least. Definitely not happening. Couldn't be. _

"_No…not…Ed…please…"_

"_Sir…Colonel Mustang…excuse me, Colonel Mustang, sir…"_

"Roy," Riza said, nudging Roy awake. He sat up with a jolt to find both Riza and a nurse staring at him with concern.

"Y-yes?" he asked shakily.

"Could you give us a few moments?" Riza asked. The nurse nodded, walking away to leave Roy and Riza alone. who then walked away. Riza looked at Roy, examining him carefully.

"Bad dream?" she asked softly.

Roy shook his head. "No, just startled me," he said gruffly, feeling a little embarrassed. He cleared his throat to speak. "What did she want?"

"We can go see Edward now," Riza said delicately, knowing better but not pushing the subject. "It's a one-at-a-time basis, and they finally just got Alphonse to leave. I think I'm going to take him to get some food and then get him somewhere quiet so he can rest. I'm sure it's been stressful for him. Why don't you go see Edward and I'll catch up with you later."

Roy nodded slowly, digesting all the information given to him. He knew that Riza was giving him the opportunity to see Ed alone, though he wasn't quite sure he wanted to anymore. After that nightmare, he'd been left a bit shaken.

Riza stood slowly, reaching into her purse and discreetly handing Roy a few tissues as she leaned to whisper in his ear.

"You might want to go wash your face before you go see him. You still look rather groggy…sir," she said softly, pressing the tissues into his hand and walking away.

Roy reached up to touch his face and was surprised to find it damp. Had he been…_crying?_ It seemed unusual, but not impossible, considering the emotional stress he'd been under lately. He saw Riza guiding a very numb-looking Alphonse towards the exit. It looked as if Al had been crying quite a bit as well, though it wasn't as if he hadn't expected that. Al was a sensitive kid; it wasn't odd that he'd be crying over his older brother, especially considering how close the two were.

He took a deep breath. It was time to go see Ed. He just had to walk in, sit down, and find the nerve to stay there until Ed woke up, or someone kicked him out, plain and simple. He tried to still his shaking hands.

_Come on, Roy, pull yourself together. You're acting ridiculous. You've seen wounded soldiers before who were probably in much worse shape than Ed is. Get over yourself,_ he scolded himself. He stood and began making his way towards Ed's room. He was relieved to see that there were no doctors rushing towards it, nor were there any occupants inside.

He slowly approached the bed where Ed lay, peacefully sleeping. As much as he'd prepared himself mentally, it still hurt to look at the blonde. Had he not seen Ed wounded before, he almost wouldn't recognize the battered youth that was the Fullmetal Alchemist.

"Oh Ed," he whispered, taking a seat next to the bed. Though he was afraid and still shaking, he took Ed's hand, gently running his calloused thumb across Ed's bandaged knuckles. He nearly jumped when he felt Ed's hand twitch. Roy frowned; no doubt, his assailant had probably stepped on his hand or smashed it with something when they attacked him. His other arm—his automail—had been completely destroyed, leaving only the naked wires still attached to the port. He was glad that the doctors had decided not to mess with them. It would have caused Ed more pain than he needed. Winry was probably on her way to fix him well enough to be able to transport him back to Risembool. How hard it must have been for Ed, having to lie there as his arm was destroyed, forced to feel to the full extent the despair of his disability. Roy couldn't ever imagine feeling that hopeless. Yes, his gloves were like a security blanket, but he could still draw circles when he absolutely had to.

Ed had nothing to take the place of his arm. Indeed, he probably _was_ nothing without his arm. His fingers were probably broken to prevent him from drawing circles. But hadn't he been in tough spots before? He'd always managed to get out of them somehow. Had someone not come at the right time…

No, he wouldn't think about that. He had to keep his thoughts as far away from that outcome as possible. After all, Edward _had_ been saved, by none other than the other residing officer at the reconstruction site besides the Elrics, the now-Major Maria Ross. She'd been transferred there to aid in the reconstruction process, mostly because she had a good idea of what was expected there, and also because she worked well with the Elric brothers. If not for her excellent aim, Edward might not…

_Knock it off, Mustang,_ Roy mentally chided again. Ed was fine. He'd been saved and he would live, if for nothing more than to be loved by Roy. But what could he do to assure Ed's safety? Make him quit the military? He didn't know if he could make the small alchemist do that.

Maybe…if he led by example…

Wait, had he just actually consider of _resigning?_ It wasn't as if he hadn't done it before, but it was for other reasons, and he'd only demoted himself, not actually quit. He couldn't actually remember a time without the military. Could it really be that easy, to go back to being just Roy Mustang?

No, probably not, but he'd do it, if it meant keeping Edward safe. He hated how the young man had turned his life upside down, but he couldn't help it now. What was done was done.

As Edward stirred, his eyes clenching tight in pain, Roy felt his heartstrings being tugged at fiercely. He groaned. He was really stuck this time. He'd always figured it would happen sooner or later, but he'd never thought it would be _this _difficult. After all, they had little in common, and the things they _did_ have in common included temperament, gender, and occupation. Not good.

"M-Mustang?" Ed gasped, slowly opening the one eye that wasn't swollen shut and slightly bandaged over.

Roy's head snapped up to look at the blonde, who was feebly trying to squirm into an upright position. He opened his mouth to speak and was alarmed to find that nothing came out. He had nothing to say!

"W-what are you doing here?" Edward asked slowly, his voice hoarse.

The usually-clever Colonel was at a loss. He had no idea how he could explain his presence. _I was worried? I thought you'd died?_ Or, would it be the usual sarcastic quip? _I'd heard you'd been injured and thought I'd come to see how much damage you'd done?_

"I…I uh…" he struggled, trying to find words that would never come.

Ed's eye drifted from Roy's face down to his hand, which was still firmly clutching Ed's, as if it had a will of it's own. Ed's exposed bruise on his face darkened. Roy was astonished. Was Edward Elric _blushing?_

"I'm sorry," Ed muttered, interrupting Roy's thoughts.

"Hm?" Roy queried, cocking an eyebrow.

A tear began to accumulate in Ed's exposed eye. "You must think I'm really stupid. I was so careless," he said, his voice cracking. "He was going to kill me. I knew that, but I didn't do anything. Had Alphonse been with me…" His voice strained, like he was fighting the urge to cry.

Roy's brow furrowed. Was Ed saying he hadn't tried to save himself at _all?_ Was he just tired, or…had it been from wanting to die? Roy wouldn't believe that. He just couldn't.

"You were tired," he said plainly, deciding that was the best possible explanation and hoping to reassure Ed as well, though it was really himself he was trying to convince.

Ed glanced down at their hands and squeezed Roy's briefly. "Maybe."

Roy felt his chest tighten. Ed still believed this was all his fault. _How typical_, he thought. Ed, his precious Ed, was always the first to either lay blame or take it, usually the latter.

"Edward," he said softly, causing the blonde to look up at him with surprise.'

"Huh?" he asked dumbly.

"Don't…just don't tell me that you aren't…that you didn't…" Roy fumbled through words, trying to find just the right fit. Being sensitive was difficult, especially when he wanted to grab the little brat and shake him, just to make sure he was really still there. Being sensitive at that point in time…it was like trying to fit a square block into a circle-shaped hole. Maybe that's what they were: a circle and a square, things that would never fit. But he was going to force it, damnit, even if it meant cutting himself into a square-shaped hole.

_A square-shaped hole? You really are losing it, Roy, _Hughes's voice said in his head.

_Don't I know it,_ Roy agreed.

"Colonel?" Ed asked quietly, sounding almost nervous.

Roy sighed, knowing he was unnerving the kid. Hell, Ed probably thought he was mad at him or something. But he wasn't…was he? No, he wasn't mad. He could never really be mad at Edward, not anymore.

"I just don't want to think you were completely helpless. Hell, maybe I do, just to keep away from the thought that you might have wanted—"

"Mustang, I'm not suicidal," Ed said irritably, much to Roy's relief and surprise. "I had a moment where I was getting my ass kicked. I hadn't had to deal with that in so long, I was…maladjusted."

Roy felt relief wash over him. At least Ed had stopped acting like some helpless child who didn't know if he'd willed being injured or not.

Ed once again interrupted his thoughts with a surprising interjection. "But you knew that, didn't you?"

The dark-haired military man was stunned. Once upon a time, he might've planned that turn-about, in hopes of getting Ed back on his feet, but he was honestly at a loss, for the first time in his life.

He shook his head, sighing. "No, Ed, I didn't. I was honestly afraid that you'd somehow given up when you were attacked, that you might've given up on living. I'm used to you coming back from everything battered and bruised, but not broken. I forget sometimes that you're not immortal. You're just a kid, really." He surprised himself so with his last statement that he felt the need to repeat it. "Just a kid…what was I thinking?"

"Roy," Ed said firmly, quickly gaining the colonel's attention. "I'm not a kid. I haven't really been a kid since my mother died. I definitely wasn't a kid when I became a state alchemist when I was twelve, even less so when I was last home." He sighed. "If you still think so, then why did I ever…"

"Have regrets?" Roy asked calmly. Of course he had regrets. He'd acted rashly and kissed a _man_ more than _twice_ his age! Of course the kid had regrets!

Ed cocked an eyebrow. "Regrets? About what?"

Roy smirked. So much for that thought. Then again, what Ed didn't realize was that he'd given Roy an opening—nay, he'd damn near given Roy an _invitation_—to invade his personal space. The question was…would he? What he did next might determine their relationship from that point on. It wasn't something to be taken lightly.

On one hand, he would be giving up so much, but on the other hand, he would be gaining so much more. Which did he value more: his military status, which would inevitably lead him nowhere, for what good, moral man succeeded in an occupation where so much corruption resided? Or was it in Edward he should invest? With Edward, things might not work out. They certainly would never be easy. They might get pretty messy. He could potentially be left with nothing.

Or…he could be left with everything. Was it really worth the risk?

"R-Roy?" Ed asked uncertainly.

Roy glanced up, taking in the sight that met his eyes. The sun peered through the blinds, striking Ed's golden hair and making his amber-colored eyes stand out brilliantly in the dull surroundings. And the way his mouth turned into that adorable little nervous frown…

Wait, had he just actually used the word "adorable"?

Yes. Yes, he had. Yes, it was worth it. Yes, yes, a million times yes.

He was doing this, and there was no turning back. Though he hadn't physically moved from his chair yet, his mind was already light years ahead of him. He knew his body would have to move quickly to catch up, not to mention that he'd have to be quick in order to gain the advantage he needed. He jumped up from his seat, moved to kneel on the bed, and quickly took up Ed's alarmed open mouth with his own.

It was nothing like he'd dreamed and everything like he'd hoped it would be. It was so different, kissing Ed, than it was when Ed had been kissing him. This time, he was ready, and Edward was the stunned one. It was exhilarating, it made his blood rush, and it scared the hell out of him. It was more than he'd felt in a long time.

Ed froze, alarmed. What was he supposed to do? It was everything he'd wanted and everything he'd feared, all in one. He had to stop himself before he did something damaging. He pushed Roy away gently, glad to find that there was no resistance, since he didn't think he could do the job with his one wounded arm.

"No, you can't do this to yourself, Roy. It will ruin your career," he said sadly.

Roy frowned, feeling frustrated. Couldn't the little pest be selfish for once? It didn't seem like that hard of a thing to do when he was younger.

_But he's not younger. He's nearly a grown man now. He's more than just some selfish kid out for himself. He's really looking out for you,_ Maes lectured.

_I'm sure he is, but this time, I just don't care about what happens. I'm just doing the first thing that comes to mind,_ Roy responded.

_Maybe that's the problem._

Roy grit his teeth. Even in his mind, Maes always made sense. He sighed heavily, rubbing his eyes tiredly.

"Don't you think I know that? Don't you think I've already figured all this out? Do you think I'm some kind of idiot who can't make decisions for himself?" he asked irritably.

"No!" Ed shouted, making it clear that his voice was returning to him in full force. "No, I don't, but…I'm not worth it. Don't you get that?"

"Damnit, Ed!" Roy shouted back. "Quit feeling sorry for yourself! I don't think that you're not worth it. I think you are _very_ worth it."

Ed felt his chest tighten. No one had ever made him feel so important, save Al.

"You'd better not be lying," he whispered.

"I've never been so honest," Roy said firmly. "Yes, I have lied to you before, for your own good, and IO should be lying now, but I'm not. Because I just can't."

Ed's brow furrowed as he tried to work everything out in his head. "How has anything changed that makes it so you can't lie to me? Tell me that."

_Just a kid…_

Roy shook his head. He must be out of his mind. But, wasn't that what love felt like?

_Love?_ He glanced over to Ed, who was still disheveled, not in the least like any woman he might've ended up with. Maybe that was why he cared so much, or why the idea of settling down suffocated him so…

_Yes…that must be it…_

"It's because I didn't…" Roy began quietly. "I didn't…"

"Didn't what?" Ed asked impatiently. "Didn't _what,_ Mustang?"

Roy's brow furrowed, making him look older than he was, perhaps as old as the years he felt. He'd imagined this differently. First of all, Ed wasn't in the hospital when he'd imagined how this would go. He'd been standing before Roy, dressed in the attire Roy had become so fond of, patiently waiting for what Roy had to say.

He nearly laughed. Maybe he was out of his mind. _Ed,_ being _patient?_ Was he stupid?

No, regardless of how he'd imagined it, this was how it was going to happen. It was almost fitting, actually. How Ed looked was how Roy had felt for years: battered, broken down, confused, always waiting for the next word. He'd been so foolish then. And now, here in this hospital room, this was where they'd finally find some healing.

"Ugh, if I had my right arm right now, I'd beat you with it," Ed said angrily, his patience having worn out.

Roy smirked. If the kid wanted it, well, he was going to get it.

"Well, Edward, I suppose it's just that I've never really seen you as a kid. Sure, you've proven time and time again to be a real pain in the neck and one nasty, impertinent, arrogant little brat, but I've always known the person you could be. I guess that's why I've always trusted your judgment and why I've let you do what you want." As the words left his mouth, he realized exactly what had been happening all along.

"I…it's my fault. I set myself up. Had I actually tried to restrain him more, like I _should_ have, I wouldn't be here right now. He'd just be a damned kid…"

"Just a damned kid?!" Ed screeched. "Why, you stupid, arrogant bastard…"

Just as Ed was about to finish, he paused to examine Roy's unusual expression. His head was bowed slightly, his eyes narrowed to the point where very little of his eyes were visible.

Roy, too consumed in his own string of thought to realize he was actually speaking out loud. "Did I create this…this feeling? This strange…love?" Roy asked, his voice just above a whisper.

Ed's breath caught in his throat. Had Roy just said the "L" word? Was he talking about him, Edward Elric? He barely dared to hope; he only paused to listen, his mouth agape and his eyes large and round like dinner plates.

Roy suddenly realized that Ed never finished his sentence. He looked up and nearly smiled at how humorous Ed looked until he realized _why_ the blonde might look that way.

_He heard me…?_

Ed's eyes were still but large amber orbs ready to fall from his head, and his mouth was still a large, gaping orifice that needed to be closed or filled. He seemed almost inhuman.

_Little I can do about it now,_ Roy mused. _It may not be how I wanted it done, but it's done._

_Means and ends, right, Roy?_ Maes's voice teased from somewhere in the back of Roy's mind.

And Roy smiled. Not a smirk, or a half-hearted, tight-lipped grimace, but a full smile. It filled his face and lighted it in a way that was simply beautiful.

Ed noticed this and it made his heart flutter nervously. His hand began to tremble slightly to the beat of which his stomach was shaking. He felt sweat beads begin to accumulate on his forehead and if it weren't for his broken fingers and missing arm, he would have pulled his hair back to get away from the heat. His face was burning—a sure sign that he was extremely embarrassed at what was folding out before him.

"Y-y-you…why are y-you smiling? This isn't funny, Mustang! This is serious!" Ed said, his voice unusually high-pitched.

Roy laughed deep in his throat. He was relieved at how light he suddenly felt, as if a huge weight had been removed from his chest after having carried it for so long.

"What's the matter, Squirt? You look kinda feverish. Maybe you should lie back down before you hurt yourself," he teased.

"Squirt?" Ed repeated, his face reddening further, though it wasn't from embarrassment. "WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL THAT HE'D PROBABLY FALL BETWEEN THE CRACKS IN HIS MATTRESS AND GET STUCK?!"

Roy shook his head, chuckling. "Nothing, Ed. Just calm down before you blow a vein."

Ed quieted down for a moment, looking at the ceiling, the wall, the floor—anything to avoid looking at that _face_ that caused him so much trouble. He settled on a particularly interesting spot on the floor that just captivated his interest, mostly because it looked like a warped transmutation circle. It wasn't really close to resembling one, since it was more of an amoeba shape than anything, and he'd pity the guy who tried transmuting something on a circle like that—

"Ed," Roy repeated. "Ed, could you quit spacing out for one second and look at me?"

Ed blinked, forgetting what he was doing and glancing back up at the colonel. Al was always telling him what a forgetful person he was, especially when something more interesting (usually alchemy-related) caught his attention. However, this time was going to prove to be the one-too-many kind, as he automatically felt his heart wrench into his throat, to the point where he could practically feel his pulse behind his Adam's apple. He'd never been so grateful that looks couldn't kill, for the one Roy was giving him was one that would smother a person if they looked too long.

It looked like it would work anyway, because couldn't catch his breath. He could feel what was happening, but it was like it was going in slow motion. Roy leaned over again, cupping the side of Ed's face with his hand and gently lining his lips up with Ed's. He didn't want to startle the blonde, but he didn't want Ed to think that he wasn't being serious, either.

He was both surprised and pleased when Ed began to kiss him back. It was definitely not the best kiss he'd ever had, but it meant more than anything to him. When they finally broke apart, Ed's face was flush and warm. Roy smiled softly. Strangely, this was much easier than he'd thought it'd be. Maybe he really did lo—

His thoughts were interrupted as he heard the distinct sound of boots coming down the hall. From the clear heel-toe footfall, he could tell…

Hawkeye was coming. And she was coming fast.

Roy turned back to Ed. "Looks like I'm going to have to go." He sighed heavily, and at the last second, pressed a brief kiss to Ed's still slightly pursed lips. The older man stood up straight just as Riza came into view through the door.

Riza glanced into Edward's hospital room, not entirely sure what it was she had been expecting, because she was surprised to see that Roy was already starting to leave when she'd arrived.

"Perfect timing," Roy said plainly, smirking at her. "I was just about to go get you. How's Alphonse?"

"Al?" Ed asked in alarm.

Roy put a hand up to silence him. "No worries, Ed. Al's fine. He's just a little tired out from having to watch over you all the time. And here I thought you were the older brother."

Ed glared at Roy. "Don't even say it."

Roy shrugged and left the room, Riza in tow. Any other time, he would have found a way to make some kind of short joke and set Ed off. That was before…everything. Now, all he had to do was sit back and wait.

If he could even do that.


	26. Understatements

**A/N: I know, yet another disappointment, but it's so damned long right now. I'll post what I have right now and have a quick update for those of you who want to strangle me later on. )**

**Thanks to everyone! I'd take more time to type out names right now, but I'm trying to throw it all together really fast so I can continue writing!**

**Ciao!**

**House**

Ed was confused. He was confused from the moment Roy left his room to the moment he was released from the hospital. He could easily see that Al was worried about him, but he couldn't bring himself to tell his precious little brother about what had transpired in his hospital room. After all, how could he? He could barely understand it himself.

"Do I…love…him? Do I love Roy?" he constantly asked himself. "I think I might…I think about him all the time and those are definitely not thoughts a normal person usually has about their superior officer." He groaned as he remembered how Roy had kissed him. He could already feel his face heating up, as well as slight stiffening between his legs. He wanted nothing more than to bury his head into his pillow and die. Every time he tried to sleep, however, he only saw Roy. When he did manage to sleep, he dreamed of dark hair and pale skin, usually not far from his own.

_Don't you think I can make decisions for myself?_ Roy's voice rang in his head.

_Yes, I do! _Ed argued silently. _I do think you can, but you just can't do this to yourself! I'm not worth it. I'll never be worth it._

He sighed, leaning back into his pillows and shutting his eyes tight, forcing Roy from his mind as he sank into a dreamless sleep.

* * *

Alphonse was worried. He was worried from the time Edward was released from the hospital to the time they reached their dorm set up in Liore. He knew that something was up, but he couldn't just _force_ answers from his older sibling. Still, that didn't keep him from worrying. After all, how could he _not_ worry? Ed had been complacent, quiet, and even _agreeable_ ever since the day Colonel Mustang had come to see him. Whatever the colonel had said to him, it obviously had made an impression.

Still, Ed was just acting _weird_. He'd even drank _milk_, as if it was no big deal at all! IT was almost as if he wasn't completely there. Whatever it was, something was bothering Ed. Though he wasn't sure he wanted to know, Al was going to find out what.

* * *

Roy was tired. Roy was tired from the second he'd left Ed's hospital room to the second he was forced back onto the train to Central by Riza.

_There's nothing we can do here, sir. We might as well go somewhere where we're needed,_ she'd argued when Roy had put up resistance.

But she was wrong! He had plenty to do in Liore. He wanted to finish what he'd started. It would have to wait for now, though. Riza seemed adamant about getting back to work. Since Ed could no longer work, he would stay in Liore until he healed well enough to travel. He would then return to Central, where he'd finish his rehabilitation. All Roy had to do was sit and wait. Still, he was impatient to get back to Ed, especially since there was so much left to discuss.

_I'd said I loved him,_ Roy thought as he watched the scenery pass by through the train window, _and I do. It's just…he never said…_

_He's just a kid, Roy,_ Maes said from inside Roy's conscience. _He's confused. He's lost. He needs time to make sure you're not just jerking him around. He wants to make sure you really do love him. Just be patient. Don't lose your head and ruin things._

_Guess you're right, Maes,_ Roy said. _You always were._

Time went on, weeks passed, and Roy found himself getting more and more frustrated with each passing day.

_Patience, sir_, Riza kept chiding, but it was becoming more apparent that patience was not Roy's strong point. It not only became apparent to those who knew him well; it also became obvious to those who didn't. Thankfully, none of those people came close to guessing the actually guessing the reason for Roy's distress.

Most just thought Roy was crazy.

"Damnit, Hawkeye," Roy hissed as he slammed his fist down on his desk, gaining the attention of everyone around him. He lowered his head to his desk and his voice to a whisper. "It's getting so hard to do this. I've been through horrible things, but this seems like torture."

Riza frowned. Roy truly was getting restless, and understandably so. It was tough to sit around, not being able to do anything. He was usually good at masking his irritation, but at that particular moment, he'd been reading through a report that was particularly frustrating and hard to read (thus reminding him of Ed).

"I just don't know how much longer I can—" Roy began.

"You won't have to, sir," Riza said plainly. "Alphonse reported in this morning, before you arrived. Both boys are safely back in their dorm room here in Central."

Roy felt irritated. Not only had he been late that morning, but in doing so, he'd missed what he'd been waiting weeks for. In addition, she hadn't informed him the second that they had arrived, like he'd told her to.

"And _why_ didn't you inform me of this, Lieutenant?" Roy asked irritably.

"To save you from making an ass of yourself, sir," Riza responded simply.

Roy narrowed his eyes and peered at her. "Glad to hear you have faith in my self-control," he said sarcastically.

The blonde officer smirked. "What self-control?"

Roy frowned. Since when had Hawkeye gotten so lippy?

Riza sighed, shaking her head. "Sir, we both know that when it comes to those boys—Edward especially—you don't always make the most sensible decisions. This is why I didn't tell you. People are talking already—"

"Who gives a damn who's talking?!" Roy interrupted. "I don't think I do." He took a deep breath, trying to cool his temper before he said something he'd regret. "I know you're concerned about my reputation, and I appreciate it, but just…don't."

Riza opened her mouth as if to say something, but then closed it again. There was nothing she could say. He didn't need her guidance, just her support. And he would have it, regardless of what came from his reckless behavior.

Roy stood and grabbed his coat. He was tired of waiting.

"Where are you going, sir?" Riza asked.

He wasn't certain if he wanted to tell her directly, or if he wanted to lie. Even if he lied, she would know, but it made little difference. She would not try to stop him. He paused, one arm in his coat. He was going to lie. He had to. It was more for her sake than his. If he lied to her, she wouldn't have to lie to anyone else. She could easily say that he'd said where he'd gone and that she didn't know for certain his location. He was willing to risk his own career, but he wouldn't allow her to risk her own, nor would he ask her to.

"A walk," Roy said simply. "I need to stretch my legs."

Riza nodded. "Very well. I trust your paperwork is done?"

Roy smirked. "Yeah, it's done."

* * *

Alphonse wringed his hands, pacing up and down the length of his and Ed's small dorm room. He knew that all the pacing in the world would do him no good. Ed was already gone.

"_Brother, where are you going?" he'd asked._

"_Out," Ed replied flatly._

"_Out where?" Al asked further._

"_Just out, Al. I'm not really sure where I'm going. I'll know when I get there."_

Knowing Ed, that could be anywhere. Regardless of location, it was usually trouble. Al had insisted upon coming, but Ed wouldn't hear of it. He'd tried to shake off the familiar feeling of impending doom, but it just wouldn't go.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door. Al felt his heart sink. Edward never knocked a day in his life when it came to entering familiar territory. Al just prayed that it wasn't another soldier coming to tell him that Ed had been hurt again.

As he timidly opened the door, he was surprised to find Colonel Mustang standing on the other side. He was more surprised to find that the colonel appeared almost _embarrassed._

"Colonel Mustang! Wha-what are you doing here, sir?" Al asked, astonished.

"I uh, came to see how Ed was doing," Roy said quietly, scratching his head and feeling uncomfortable in the presence of the younger Elric.

Al smiled weakly, shrugging slightly. "Well, he's doing better…well enough to get up and go out for a walk. He was even well enough to argue. I'd say he's almost to one hundred percent. Eighty-five, maybe. Nowhere near well enough to go back to work, though."

Roy nodded. "I figured as much. I just wanted to drop by while I was in the neighborhood and see how well he was doing. Since everything seems to be fine, I'll be going."

As Roy turned to leave, Al spoke up. "Since you're here, I thought I'd ask you…not that it's any of my business, but…what did you say to my brother…that day in the hospital?"

Roy looked down, afraid to look Al in the eye. Alphonse was a smart kid; surely he'd be able to read into anything Roy said. Sure, Ed might've said something to his brother, but somehow, he didn't think Edward had said anything. Still, he couldn't take the chance that maybe, he just might have.

"I uh…we were talking and I was worried…I might've been a little rougher with him than I had intended," Roy said, scratching his head.

_Understatement of the year,_ his Maes conscience chided.

"Did he say anything to you about it?" Roy asked. Realizing that it might've come out sounding suspicious, he added, "I mean, did he mention anything to you? Maybe how he took it?"

Alphonse shook his head slowly. "Nothing. I wasn't going to make him tell me, but I knew something had happened. He's been acting so strange lately."

Roy heaved a sigh of relief. So Ed hadn't told him anything. It was for the better, after all, the less people that knew, the smaller the chance that anyone might find out and leak it to the wrong people. There were more than a few people who would have loved to see Roy fall, and he couldn't let Ed be dragged into that…not anymore.

Roy shrugged. "What do I know? I was just a little tough on the kid. I didn't mean to actually hurt him or anything. If he intends on running off to pout, I'm going to have to insist on going out and finding him. The last thing I need is for the best alchemist under my command going AWOL on us, or getting himself into even more trouble. He won't be any good to me dead."

Alphonse nodded in understanding—a deeper understanding than Roy realized. Though to anyone else, Roy would have been completely inconspicuous, to someone like Al, he was as transparent as glass. There was just no way that Roy could get off the hook that easy.

_The colonel is obviously worried about Brother,_ Al thought. _It sounds like something's going on that I don't know about…could Ed have…told the colonel about his feelings? I don't think he'd have gathered up the nerve so soon, but then again, he was under a considerable amount of pain, and he did just have a close brush with death. So, either Colonel Mustang is worried for him because he doesn't want anyone else to know about what Brother told him, or…_

_Or he feels the same,_ Al realized suddenly, his eyes growing large and round in an instant. He glanced over at the older man, who was shifting weight awkwardly from one foot to the other. _He looks more like an overgrown child than a skilled military officer and trained alchemist,_ he mused. _Maybe there is more to this than I realized._

"Listen, Alphonse, you wouldn't happen to know where your brother might have gone, would you?" Roy asked. "I don't think it's wise for him to be out running around in his condition."

Al shook his head. "No, I don't think I know where he went. All he said was that he was going out for a walk, and he'd know where he was going when he got there. That's all he said."

"Sounds like Ed," Roy muttered irritably. He sighed and shrugged. "Oh well, I guess I'll have to go looking around for him then. Thanks anyway." With a wave, he walked off, leaving Al there to shake his head and chuckle at the colonel's blatancy.

* * *

Roy walked home, wondering just what he'd gotten himself into. He couldn't imagine where Edward could be, and he couldn't help but worry. He hadn't seen Ed since that day in the hospital, and then he'd looked pretty banged up.

_Understatement of the year,_ Roy thought miserably as he shuffled his feet along the pavement. He sighed heavily, shoving his hands in his pockets. Sure, he'd told Al he'd go looking for Ed, but he had no idea where to begin looking.

"Well, first I'll go home and make a few calls, maybe get Hawkeye to help me look…lord knows Falman, Fuery, and Breda won't have anything to do…Havoc said he had a date tonight…" Suddenly, the thought of Havoc having a date made him chuckle. "I'll call him in about ten minutes, I think. His date should be over by then."

Of course, Roy knew two things: one, it was about seven in the evening; two, Havoc's date was at seven. And it was assumable that Havoc's Law would come into play: _whatever could possibly go wrong in a date, would. _(A/N: reference to Murphy's Law: whatever can go wrong, will. Of course, this side of the gate would have no idea what that would mean. Well, except Ed, and no one can tell me how _that _isn't ironic…) So it could be logically assumed that Jean would be free in a matter of moments to join the search team.

Roy paused all thought, however, when he saw that the very person he was searching for was sitting on his front steps, clad in dark slacks, a light, white dress shirt, and what seemed to be a light jacket. He also seemed to be shivering and was unaware of Roy's presence. Roy shook his head in dismay. No matter what anyone did, Ed would never think logically.

Ed looked up and saw Roy, bringing him to his feet immediately. Roy couldn't help but notice how Ed favored his left leg. He was probably feeling vulnerable without his other arm. Roy vaguely wondered when it was going to be replaced. He hated seeing Ed so…awkward, so out-of-sorts. It was unsettling.

"Hello," he said slowly, making his way to where Ed stood. "You know your brother is worried, don't you?"

Ed nodded. "Yeah, probably. Al's always worried about something."

Roy raised an eyebrow in surprise. "You're not concerned about worrying your brother?"

Ed shrugged. "Not really. I guess he's always going to be worried about something. I can't help that, anymore than you can help being an arrogant ass at times."

Roy's brow furrowed. He felt a twinge of annoyance, but he also felt sad at how different the dynamic between Ed and Al had become. Neither seemed too concerned about the other's wellbeing. They cared, but Al seemed as if he'd given up and Ed seemed almost apathetic. Edward Elric had been many things: annoying, overbearing, arrogant, pushy, bossy, ignorant, and loud, but he'd never been apathetic, especially about his brother. It was very disconcerting.

"Ed, I…," he began.

"I know," Ed said sadly, as if reading his thoughts. "Listen, Mustang, I don't…know why you came to my room at the hospital, or why you said the things you did, but I thought about it, and this is just a bad idea. It can't end well. Either we go through with this and we get caught, which gets us both thrown out of the military and socially ostracized, or we go through with this and wind up tearing each other apart. It's just too messy."

Roy grit his teeth, but was unable to keep his thoughts from escaping. "And what if it does work? What if we don't get caught? I think you're being pretty pessimistic here, Ed. You've never been careful a day in your life, so why start now?"

Ed frowned, "Because it's you!" he shouted, seeming almost surprised at his own words. "It's you," he repeated quietly. "Even if this does work, we can never tell anyone. Sure, maybe Al will know, and that's fine with me, because he's all I have and I've kept things from Winry my whole life. But what about you? You have people who…who follow you, unquestioning of you like you're some kind of god, and…"

Roy felt his insides shake. No one had ever said such things to him, save Maes, and Maes had been his rock. If he lost Ed like he lost Maes…no, he couldn't. He couldn't give up on this. He'd come too far to let Ed get away this easily.

He walked forward and grabbed Ed by the shirt, pulling him close and kissing him fiercely. Ed tried hard to fight back, but he was still weak and could do little to fight Roy off. Finally, Roy released Ed, stepping back. The blonde stared at him, wild-eyed in disbelief.

"Are you crazy?! I know it's dark, but it's not late, and people are still out, you know! What if someone had seen that?!" Ed asked in a harried whisper.

Roy simply smirked and shrugged indifferently. "So what?"

"So what? SO WHAT?!" Ed nearly shouted. He blushed and looked around frantically. "Do you realize that you could be—"

"Thrown out of the military?" Roy asked, laughing. "I know. Actually, I can guarantee that should we be caught, we will definitely be court-martialed and then who knows? Discharged, maybe thrown in jail, though I seriously doubt it will be that bad." He shrugged again. "I don't really care. I've thought about this more than a dozen times, and I've decided that I just don't care what happens. At one time, sure, I might have, but right now, I just don't give a damn."

Ed's eyes widened. He couldn't believe what he was hearing. He'd always believed that the military was everything to Roy. After all, it was his livelihood, the thing he'd probably always done…why would he throw it all away for someone…like him? He just couldn't fathom it.

Roy smiled softly as he could practically see the wheels turning inside the young man's head. He gently took Ed's arm, earning a startled look from the young alchemist.

"Why don't we go inside? It's cold out here and you aren't wearing the right kind of jacket," he suggested.

Ed shook his head. "No, I actually…I came to say what I needed to say. I think I should get home now."

Roy tried to think of something, anything to get Edward to stay. He tried to rack up any short joke, but something told him that tactic would no longer work. He was now working with a different kind of Edward Elric. Something had changed inside the Fullmetal Alchemist, and now he had to get back on his toes. It was something completely new to him, since he'd always had the advantage in such situations. Now, he knew why this was so important to him, and why he had to make this work: he was on his toes, and he'd never felt so alive in his life. He'd felt a plethora of emotions in such a short time, and he had to find out more about it. He had to get more of it to see what it was that was happening to him, why it affected him so.

"Edward," Roy said softly, feeling his heart flutter as a pair of glazed over amber eyes locked onto his. "I…there's something I need to say too, but…you're right. Here's not the place to do it, where others can see. I need to tell you something now, so come inside. Please."

Ed's eyes widened slightly at the slight pleading note in Roy's voice. He nodded slowly, looking towards the door. "Just for a moment, though."

Roy nodded. A moment was all he needed to get out what he needed to say. He guided Ed up the steps to his apartment, pausing only to unlock his door. He stepped aside, to allow the younger man to enter without feeling pressured. Of course, he could understand Ed's nervousness. After all, he was nervous, too. It was the first time he'd ever brought anyone up to the apartment. As he thought about it, it wasn't very suspicious at all that he brought Edward up to his apartment. No one could possibly guess anything except a meeting between two alchemists who worked together, or a gathering of friends…

Friends? They were friends, right? Of course, in his heart, he knew he wasn't just wanting to be Ed's friend, but as it was now, they were friends.

"Have a seat," Roy said, gesturing to the plush black sofa situated by the window in the living room. Ed sat carefully and looked around. Roy couldn't help but notice how he grasped the empty sleeve of his jacket as he sat there. He wanted to sit beside Ed, to feel that empty sleeve and show him there was nothing to feel empty about, but he opted to stand instead…for the moment, anyway.

"Are you…cold?" he asked uncomfortably, unsure of how he was going to explain everything to the younger man. There were many things to be said, many things Roy had wanted to say for a long time, but he couldn't decide which was more prevalent. He just prayed Ed would have the patience to sit and listen. He knew he was practically asking for a miracle, but he figured he hadn't asked for much in his life; what was a few minutes of time from the person he cared for so deeply?

_Okay, Roy, just back it up a bit,_ he scolded himself. _Horse, then cart._

He became amused at how long it had been since he'd used that old saying. His father had always used to say it whenever he would get too quick to jump to conclusions, or would try to rush through something.

_Don't you think you're putting the cart before the horse, son? _his father would ask.

_Only if I want the horse to push, _Roy would say nonchalantly, shrugging and going off to do whatever it was his father warned him not to. Of course, his father was usually right, but he never told him that. Some days, he wished he had.

_Because you were right,_ Roy said fondly. _And I think now would be a good time to listen._

He sighed and crossed his arms, leaning against the nearby wall. His mind ran through a million things he could start with, but finally, he settled on one thing that had been bothering him for a long time.

"Why me, Edward?" he asked softly, looking at the floor. He could still feel Ed's questioning gaze, but he kept his to his shoes. The less he looked at Ed, the more he could get through.

"Why you…? Oh," Ed said simply. Roy heard shuffling and a slight sigh. "I don't know. I asked myself that for a long time. Why you? I never liked you. I _hated_ you. But you never hated me, I guess. That's it. You never hated me, or pitied me, or treated me like anything other than what I was. Everyone put so much on me. I almost hated them for it. I hated myself for it…for everything…for what I did…to Mom, and to Al…" He sighed again, more heavily this time, and Roy could practically feel the weight still sitting on Ed's chest.

_So he feels it, even after all this time… _Roy thought sadly. _Just like me._

"But you felt it, too," Ed continued, as if reading Roy's thoughts. "You knew all these things, and you could have made it so easy for me to go get myself killed. Instead, I was always placed in the way, and then out of it just in time. I was always too early or too late. You were either placing me in the right place at the wrong time, or keeping me from doing what I needed to. Had I ever been where I was…and without you…we never would have…"

Roy could hear Ed's throat tightening and it touched him so he felt his own burn. Was that what Ed had been holding in, all that time? He wanted to ask, but he decided to be quiet would be the wisest course of action, since he didn't think Ed had yet finished. He was certain there'd be time for him to say what he needed to say. This was Ed's time to let go. He'd opened a well deep inside of the young alchemist, and if Edward didn't let it all out, it would surely drown him.

"I thought about thanking you, once, that time I jumped the car…yours and Hawkeye's. I wanted to, but I didn't think it would make a difference. I thought I was going to die. I…did die, that day…" Ed said quietly.

Roy's heart jumped in his throat. Surely Ed meant it differently. Surely he hadn't actually died. It was probably metaphorical or something.

"Envy stabbed me, right in the chest…"

Guess not.

"And I saw the gate, saw London…the other Edward's body…and Al…and he sacrificed himself for me, but I couldn't let him do that again. So I sacrificed myself for him, so I thought…and then I was in Germany. Somehow, my old man found me…he'd thought I'd died when the Zeppelin fell on me…and I did. Well, the other Edward did. I was safe, back in my own body on this side of the gate. I couldn't understand it. And Dante…I don't know what happened to her, and frankly, I don't care. She won't be able to create another Philosopher's Stone in the condition the world's in now. It would be too obvious. She'd probably love the other side, with the war coming on…ugh, but I'm rambling again," Ed groaned. "Alfons always did give me grief for that, the rambling…"

Roy looked over at Ed when he'd paused, to gauge just how bad things looked. Surprisingly, Ed looked almost…_happy_. At first Roy thought Ed had finally lost his manic little mind, but something told him it just probably felt good to get it all out…even if it was incoherent. And Roy wouldn't ask him anymore about it after this night. No, it was Ed's secret to keep, and he'd let him keep it, if it would keep Ed there with him.

"I never told anyone about that. Not even Al," Ed said lightly. "I wonder why I never told him. I told him pieces, yes, but not everything. I wonder if I ever will…"

"Some things are meant to stay secret," Roy said softly, causing Ed to glance at him again. He smiled softly with understanding.

"Maybe…" Ed looked at his feet momentarily before looking back up at Roy. "What was it you were going to say?"

Roy cocked an eyebrow. Somehow, he'd almost forgotten the situation they were in. Since he finally got Ed to calm down and sit, he could easily assume he had the blonde's attention.

"I…wanted to say…," Roy began slowly, feeling his heart race in his chest. His mouth was dry and his eyes burned from adjusting to the dark. Why in the Hell were they sitting in the dark, anyway? The light from the moon gave enough light, he supposed, and the streetlights, sure, but why not turn on a light? His hand went towards a switch, but he suddenly felt compelled to leave the lights off, so he let his hand drop to his side.

"I missed you," Roy said plainly. He was amazed that the words had even left his mouth. They seemed to jump from his tongue of their own will. He paused, waiting for a reaction from Ed, a confirmation that what he'd said when they first arrived was a lie.

"Oh," Ed murmured. "Is that all?"

Roy felt the familiar irritation creep up on him. _Is that all? I just admitted that I missed you, you little pain in the ass! What else do you want?!_

He paused and chuckled. How easily he was pushed back to his old ways. All that time, and he hadn't learned a thing about Ed. Something he'd come to understand about Edward Elric was that he only made insensitive comments whenever he was uncomfortable. There was a certain ignorance about the blonde, but it wasn't as big as he'd once let everyone think. He knew a thing or two about changing a subject.

Roy smiled slightly and shook his head, even though he knew Ed couldn't see it very well. "No. That's not all." He walked over to the sofa and sat down next to Ed. His heart was thundering in his ears. He knew what he wanted to do, but he wasn't sure how to go about it. He wasn't Ed. He didn't just go around doing random things with the luxury of knowing people almost expected it from him. No, Roy Mustang was a predictable man.

And he was getting tired of it.

He grabbed Ed's chin and tilted it up so he could gently place his lips over Ed's. At first, Ed flailed, but Roy knew how to hold firm. He'd never been refused before, so it was different and somewhat exciting for him to be entering into such a different area. He was almost scared, but then he remembered that at one time, not so long ago, Ed had wanted him too. He wanted him now, Roy was sure of it, he just needed to remind the younger man who he used to be, and hope that Ed would catch on.

**Like I said, I'm writing! I'm writing!**


	27. Lemonade is Much Sweeter When Let Sit :

**A/N: Woo, yay, and woot woot. Finally, the moment you've all been waiting for… Yes, THAT moment. Most of you (especially those who've been waiting oh-so-patiently) know exactly what I speak of. So here it is, in black and white.**

**I would have had this posted earlier, but today was my 20****th**** birthday, and so I was somewhat busy. But now it is posted, and I feel loads better. Here's a little bit of birthday lemonade for all of you! **

**Thanks go to everyone who was patient enough to wait for this (how many chapters was it again?). This particularly enjoyable chapter is for you. Feel free to leave me a message letting me know if I have/have not been worthy of your time.**

**Ciao!**

Ed felt his breath catch in his throat. He was about to open his mouth and make a comment to try and lighten the somber mood, but he was momentarily distracted by the feeling of weight next to him and then…

The warmth. His heart was doing back flips and his head felt light. He knew the feeling by now, but it didn't stop him from putting an arm up in resistance.

_No! He can't do this! If he does, we're both_—

But the thought never came. The only thing he could feel was falling. His back hit something…something soft, and he was vaguely aware that he was laying back on Roy's sofa with Roy leaning over him, but his mind couldn't process it somehow. It was like being drugged or just waking up. He was so groggy, he could hardly feel his fingers. Then there were hot lips on his neck, hands on his waist, and oh, nothing had ever felt so solid, so real. He felt anchored to the world, but the world wasn't anchored to him like before. He didn't feel the burdens of sin, or the weight of his guilt. He just felt…_light_…

_Roy pushed up his shirt, kissing the flat, scarred tissue that was Ed's stomach. He paused for a moment to admire the feeling of solid muscle beneath his fingers before moving on. Roy was on a mission to get to the truth, Ed was certain. But what was the truth? He wanted to say it so bad, but it danced on his tongue like a lie that he knew shouldn't be told. But it wasn't a lie! It was the truth! It was the biggest truth he could ever tell, and his super-secret secret._

_Roy stilled his movements as his hands rested back on Ed's waist. "Am I…wrong?"_

_Somehow, Ed knew what that meant. Am I wrong? Am I wrong in assuming that you care about me, that you trust me, that you…love…me? It was such an odd question to anyone else, but somehow, Ed knew exactly what Roy had meant._

_Suddenly, there was a feeling of released pressure accompanied with a feeling of greater pressure. Of course, without actually knowing, Ed knew two things: 1) he was hard, and 2) Roy had his pants. Neither were of real consequence, because after all, it all felt so hazy, much like the dreams Ed used to have of Roy, back when he was in Germany and woke up next to Alfons, sweating and ashamed._

_Oh Alfons, you knew all along what I felt, and yet you still wanted to be my friend. I dragged you down…_

_No. No thoughts like that now. All thoughts of what he had done and what he should have done flitted away from him like butterflies. They were flying away from him and he couldn't feel them at all._

"_Am I wrong?" Roy asked, his breath hot in Ed's ear._

_Ed wanted to speak, but his lips were lazy and his tongue was heavy. His eyelids felt heavy too, and they slung midway down his eyes. It was like being really tired, but not being able to fall asleep. Oh, how many nights had he been like this, thinking of this very thing? It was almost like his body was training him for this, training him to surrender everything he had to the one man he felt really had him._

_He felt air hitting a place he knew well enough, only it felt different from other times it'd been touched. With girls, he never felt aroused. He just felt…empty. Now, with him, with the man he'd dreamed of so many nights, he felt the way he felt whenever he relieved himself after heavy dreams like this. He'd relieved himself in the shower, sometimes collapsing into sobs and letting the cold water hit him. He'd felt so pathetic then…_

_But now, now he felt better. Now he felt wanted. And the wetness hit his lower regions fast as Roy slid his throbbing member into his mouth. Ed let out a gasp and felt his muscles tighten. He had not expected any of that. It almost hurt, the wave of pleasure that hit him. As Roy spread his hands over Ed's stomach to try and ease his tense muscles, he let his tongue make lazy circles over Ed's hardened length, lapping up what liquid had begun to accumulate there. Ed groaned and involuntarily, his hips arched upward._

_Part of his mind was screaming. He knew this was wrong, he knew he was doomed, but part of his logic was telling him to calm down, that this was all a dream, that he hadn't really left the dorm; he was probably just in bed having what was turning out to be a very vivid dream and he would wake up to wet sheets and a throbbing headache, amongst other things._

_He felt Roy release his erection from his mouth and could literally smell his own scent on Roy's breath as the older man made his way back up towards Ed's face. He kissed Ed's lips gently and looked him straight in the eyes. It robbed Ed of his breath. He'd never seen Roy so completely vulnerable, not in his wildest dreams. Roy looked so open, so completely bare that it made Ed's heart ache._

"_Am I wrong?" he whispered again._

_Ed's brow furrowed as he tried to communicate what he knew would doom him for sure, but still nothing came. He could barely open his mouth. It was as if his very vocal chords were rioting against him._

"_Tell me I'm wrong, Ed, that's all you have to do," Roy said softly. His eyes seemed to be pleading with Ed to respond, but try as he might, Ed could not form any words. He simply laid there, breathing softly. His body had a mind of its own, and it wasn't letting Edward interfere with it at all._

_Roy lifted Ed from the sofa and carried him into a bedroom. Ed looked around, noting all the things in the room that were so incredibly __**Roy**__ that it was impossible to conceive that this room belonged to anyone else._

"_I'm probably just imagining all the things about Roy that I know and materializing them into objects," Ed reasoned with himself. "This isn't actually happening. I'll wake up soon."_

_As sad as that thought made him, he knew that was the way it had to be. And when he woke up tomorrow, he would resign once and for all. He had to. He had to save both Roy and himself from complete ruin. It was almost tragically amusing, the fact that it had to be he who saved the full-grown man of the military from complete ruin. It should have been the other way around. And it had been. So Ed could mark that one down as a way to repay Roy for all the times he'd saved Ed's ass and call it even. Yes, once he repaid that debt, he'd never have to come back again…_

_His mind was torn from its dreamy thoughts as the rustle of clothing alerted him to the fact that Roy was undressing, right in front of him. He would have been enjoying the view, but his mind was torturing him._

"_If this is a dream, why is it taking so damned long?" he wondered. "And since when did I go through this entire process?"_

_But he never answered himself. He was too busy being lifted to a sitting position, his jacket removed and his shirt unbuttoned. His shirt was finally taken from him, leaving him completely bare. He felt incredibly exposed, though he could distinctly remember feeling much more comfortable in his dreams. He glanced over at his naked port, sitting vacant and feeling oddly forlorn._

"_Oh yeah, and I wasn't one-armed, either. What the Hell?" he asked, half-amused at how warped this dream was becoming. "Maybe I got drunk and didn't know it. Maybe Al drugged me to keep my ass at home. Who knows?"_

_He felt Roy pause again and found himself looking back up at those eyes that just wouldn't leave him alone. Was this a dream, or a nightmare?_

"_Am I wrong?" Roy asked again, this time more firmly._

"_And it's also becoming very annoying," Ed remarked to himself. "If he asks me one more time…"_

_And he felt the push. The feeling of being filled with such a foreign thing that it nearly tore him in two. He tried to remember what Alfons had said once about feeling pain in your dreams meaning that you were really dying, but his mind was blank. All he could feel was that __**feeling**__, that feeling like he was being awkwardly stuffed but filled so completely at the same time._

_That feeling left him and then came again as Roy slid back into him. He could feel a burning sensation, but it felt more distant as Roy began softly pulling in and out of him. He gasped, but still, no words came._

"_Am…am I wrong, Ed? Was I really that wrong?" Roy asked, his voice almost sounding as if he was crying. It was tragic, and Ed would have felt heartbroken, but the feeling was so good, he couldn't bear to part with it for a few moments. He wasn't even sure he still knew what that feeling meant. He just felt the sliding of skin and the pounding of blood. Nothing else seemed to matter._

_Suddenly, Roy slammed into him and hit a point that made every cell in Ed's body sing._

"Ah!" Ed cried out, arching his back to give Roy better access. Roy drove into Ed again and again, clenching his teeth and putting everything he had into pounding Ed into the bed that was now damp with their sweat. Ed could feel something hot ooze from his opening, and it wasn't painful, but it certainly wasn't very pleasant, either.

"Am…am I…," he panted as he thrust into Ed's tight opening, barely able to form words and feeling as if his heart might burst, both from the strenuous activity and the grief he felt at how wrong this seemed. He'd already come, but none of that seemed to matter. It wasn't anything like he'd imagined. He'd heard so much about what it was like to be with someone you loved. He'd even heard specific details from a few of his comrades during the Ishbal massacre—men who'd been in the military so long, the unavailability of women with which they could procreate was not even an issue. He knew from these details that it was going to be messy, but he'd never imagined that it would be messy in a completely different sense altogether.

It was like a horrible nightmare he couldn't wake up from. It was something he couldn't even stop. He just kept going, knowing that he wouldn't stop until he passed out. This could possibly kill him, but it was what he wanted to die doing. He wanted to die, right there beside Ed, who he felt already owned his life, no matter what he did. So why not die? It would certainly be fitting.

He pulled out and gave one last thrust, feeling every joint ache and cry out in pain.

"No!" Ed cried out as he came, grabbing onto Roy with his arm. He slid it around Roy's neck, pulling him close to Roy so that their bodies were close together. Roy felt his knees give out, and he used the last bit of his strength to move himself over to lie next to Ed, rather than falling right on top of him. He knew he wasn't that heavy, and Ed probably could have handled it, if he were in better condition.

Ed blinked, the haze having cleared and his mind fully functional once again. He felt burning in his eyes and knew that he was crying. He hated himself for it, but couldn't help but cry. He wasn't crying for himself, but the man who had collapsed beside him. He'd nearly worn himself unconscious, just trying to prove that he cared. And Ed had been stupid and selfish in thinking he could make such a decision for a grown man like Roy. It was almost vain, holding himself over Roy, dangling himself when he knew from the first time he saw Roy again what the older man felt. It was so damned obvious.

_That doesn't matter now,_ Ed thought as he watched Roy's breathing slow. He pulled a blanket that Roy had pushed aside over both of them and cradled Roy's head to his chest. None of that mattered to him at all. For all he cared, half the military could come through that door. Nothing would separate him from the feeling he felt at that moment. He'd only felt it two or three times in his life, but it was never so intense as it was at that very second.

_Love. This must be it. I can't think of anything else to describe it_, Ed thought.

"I love you," he whispered into sweat-matted dark hair that clung to his chest. "I love you."

"Edward…" Roy whispered, his voice breaking with exhaustion.

Ed let a small smile slip past his lips and he pressed a kiss to Roy's temple.

"You don't have to tell me. I already know. I've known all along."


	28. And So It Goes

-1**A/N: Ah, and here it is…we come to the end of all things (well, maybe not ALL things, but the end of this story, at least). It has nearly been a year since I began this and I feel so privileged to have had the opportunity to share it with all of you (whom I will list at the end of this chapter--if you ever left a comment at any time in the story, your name will be there, as a sign of my gratitude for your attention). This is my first fic, and I am so thrilled that it went over as well as it did. Three hundred-fifty-five comments to date! I never expected it to be so well-received. I remember back when I was giddy at the idea of having a whole twenty comments! Ah, but I delay too long. So yeah, at the end of this chapter, I'll list everyone who ever paid homage to what has become my little baby (and little monster). Thanks.**

**Disclaimer (haven't seen one of those in awhile, huh?): This is not mine. If it was, I would currently be creating an anime that continues on after the movie. Why? Because that's the way uh-huh, uh-huh I like it. **

It was a beautiful afternoon in Risembool, and Ed was watching as his brother and Winry worked on the new prototype for his arm. He was not only anxious to once again feel complete, but also pleased to see his brother and friend working together. There was no better team for the job. Winry knew the mechanics of it all, and only Al knew exactly how it would be put to use, so Ed wasn't worried in the least. He trusted them both implicitly to give him the best work they both could. He was glad to see his brother so at ease as well. He knew how much Al worried about being worthy enough for Winry, though he never said it. He didn't have to. They _were_ brothers, after all.

It didn't really take a brother to see how Al felt about their mechanically-inclined friend, however. He simply glowed when she was around. Ed had a feeling Winry knew, but was just waiting for Al to do something about it.

Just then, Ed got an idea…a truly awful idea…

He grinned mischievously. "Equivalent exchange is a bitch, little brother."

As he was sitting there, watching his brother and thinking evil thoughts that no brother should ever think about another (but often do), he was unaware of a certain presence behind him, watching him just as intently as he was watching his sibling. This certain presence was currently inches from his ear, waiting for him to twitch, move slightly, do _something!_

"Planning something, Edward?" Roy asked, causing the smaller male to finally move away instantly, swatting to the side wildly in hopes of hitting whatever the disturbance was.

He missed Roy by feet and nearly took his own eye out. Roy simply looked on in amusement as the blonde began to slowly revert to behavior he was better known for when he was younger.

"What did you think you were doing, trying to give me a heart attack?! Geez, you bastard!" he screeched, waving his arms around angrily.

Roy smirked, realizing that it was a prime opportunity to make a small joke…literally. "Oh, were you there? Sorry, didn't see you."

Ed's eyes narrowed as he growled at the taller man. "WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE COULD USE YOUR SHOE LACES AS A JUMP ROPE!!!"

Roy laughed low in his throat, nudging Ed with his elbow. "Whatever you do in your spare time is your business. Just make sure you put my laces back on my shoes. Unlike you, I actually _tie_ my shoes."

Ed frowned slightly and opened his mouth as if to fire off a smart retort, but instead shut his mouth and crossed his arms, making a rather adorable pout.

Roy shook his head, amazed at how easily Ed gave up. It really was remarkable, the changes they had each gone through. Ed had become more subdued, like Alphonse, and Al had become more outgoing, like Edward. It was as if they had each swapped a little bit of their personality during their trip home. Ed had realized that as well, and he was ashamed for not noticing it sooner, but he would make up for it. There was a lot of that to be doing.

Ed gave a little smile and looked down at his shoes to find that they actually _were_ untied. _Evil bastard…_ he hissed in his mind. He glanced back at Roy to find him smirking back. Ed crossed his arms and bowed his head to hide his blushing. So much had happened in the time since he'd shown up at Roy's apartment…and there was still so much more that could happen… It had been no easy feat, trying to explain everything to his brother, but he felt that Alphonse somehow understood. He still had Winry to tell, but he somehow didn't think it would be as bad as he imagined. Sure, she hadn't been all that thrilled when Roy had shown up at her doorstep with Ed, but after being assured that it was only to keep an eye on the blonde, she had seemed somewhat subdued.

Al laughed as Winry accidentally shot a little oil in his direction, looking at her fondly in a way he reserved only for her. Nearby, Roy was looking at Ed in the same way, causing a warm feeling to flow over the younger of the two.

_No, come to think of it, I didn't miss you at all._

What a lie that had been. He had missed Roy. He'd missed everyone. He'd missed being home.

_Home. _Yes, Edward was finally home. He'd missed many things in the years he'd been searching for everything other than what was in front of him, when that was all he really needed…just what was in front of him the whole time. He really had just started to make up for what he'd missed, but there was still so much more…

It was really good that Ed had all the time in the world, because there was a lot of those things.

A lot to make up for.

**So how was that? Not too terrible, eh? Well, that's not where this story ends, I can assure you. I am currently working on two different pieces, one which happens to be the sequel to this one, and one called "Cherry Blossoms," another RoyEd fic I am very excited about.**

**So thank you, grazie, gracias, domo, merci, danke, and wado to everyone who has commented on this story and made it such a wonderful experience for me. (btw, that's thanks in English, Italian, Spanish, Japanese, French, German, and Cherokee. That's all I know, so please don't take offense if I missed a language. If you'd like to teach me a new one, I'm always open to suggestions.)**

**BlackMercifulFaerie, ThexYaoixNinja, Visual Confectionary, Pojo-san, rayvnofsorrows, Kawaii Kisu, Amy, Kitti, Vivian Black715, BloodRaevynn, Meekah Greenleaf, yutakayumi, TaintedShikonShards, edluver14, Nuitari Aquarius, Shadewolf7, marufu-chan, Panic, AirElemental101, Roy Mustang 08, amichka, KiboKi, Janchanb, Crimson lantern, GreyLiliy, xXX Bishiman Sephiroth XXx, Dark Mage Makai, anmbcuconnfan, GreedxEd, hiya24, Julietlvsthebeat, Sophie, Iseult of the Snows, Amsuhl, Sadler, Kirbychan, lotrhpfan1234, Mus4u, AstroStarr42, Koigokoro-Love, Satan in a Pretty Costume, ai-08, lady scorpio, DesperateMeasures, Chetra-card, gundanium, Glue Project, kiryanna, jam280, zst4ever, msberry, YaoiPrincess, HFA and Kisa, Shine Lumiere, catwomen47, KeveTenjoin, Lunadia-aloneforevermore, Meghan H., Bar-Ohki, nanoSaby5, Demonskid, theSaiyanKira, Mage of Dragons, Evil Pixies Are Yummy, the Sayjin Kira (theSaiyanKira? Same?), Daeleniel Shadowphyre, Krystal T. M., inuyasha-demon-lover, Kikiko, The Lady Morana, Crazy4Skittles, Phantomsnow, KajiMori, Ebony Cassandra selene Ridd…, littlelibra, BlazenFantasy, Chelsea, joe90, Suvi, Ranewen Ancalime, AAJ Edward, SoubiAgatsumaSama, gggggggggggggg (that's a reviewer, not a typo), I love Malfoy as a ferret, too-lazy-to-login, Paon, Afrieal, Ed Fullmetal Alchemist, tapole910, Mocodity, Amber-Brooke, **

**Spirix, Child of Rainbows, kitkat78, The Wonderful Crack Fairy, horsepoet, Leminy, pure.life, WhisperedDaydreams, Wolfgirl99, StupefiedNarutard, Kichi Tsukima, Eternal-Goddess-Of-Light, and animevamp727.**

**Good grief! That's a lotta reviewers! Well, I love each and every one of you for it. In fact, I do so love you that I am designing an icon for the sequel. However, I am not posting it on my DeviantArt account (samaire). I am only giving it to those who have been so wonderful to me this first time around. So, you ask, "How do I get it?!" Well, just leave a comment on the sequel with this somewhere in it: "ALTMUF commentaholic." That's all. :D I also hope to see many familiar names gracing the reviews page. There's nothing better than a panel of readers who have already given so much attention. Thank you, and see you in the next one!**

**houseprodigy**


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